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The one who wanted to know was Thomas, my best friend, who, together with his big brother, regularly sold all kinds of stuff at the aforementioned flea market. And I was regularly roped into helping set up and sell. Not a particularly pleasant activity in freezing temperatures. I was still freezing just thinking about the past weekend. This time, however, I had a good reason to decline with thanks.
“Sorry, I really can't. My mother and her boyfriend are dragging me to a swimming competition.“
”And who's competing? Not one of those water-shy specimens of the human race like you?"
Thanks a lot. It wasn't my fault that I was in the hospital with leukemia when everyone else was taking swimming lessons. When I wanted to learn how to swim later on, I almost drowned the first time I went into the water, and since then I've had a somewhat strained relationship with the subject. Although I've since learned to keep myself reasonably safe above water, I still preferred to stay in areas where at least my head was above the water's edge.
“Nah, it'll never come to that. Tim, the guy's son, is a great swimmer. My mom thinks a day spent together would be the ideal opportunity for us to get to know each other.“
”Oh, oh, it sounds like they're actually serious.”
“It really looks that way. They spend almost every free minute together. I wouldn't be surprised if wedding bells were to ring in the near future.“
”And what do you think of it?“
”Difficult question. Well, my mother hasn't been this happy in years, and Reinhardt seems okay too.“
”And your stepbrother-to-be?”
“Ha, you got me, you weren't really listening.“
”Why?“
”I said that we were just supposed to meet on Saturday. So far I've only seen a picture of him and spoken a few words with him on the phone when I called there because of an emergency and was looking for my mother.”
I don't know why, but in all the time that my mother and Reinhardt had known each other, she had never actually met Tim.
“Well, then you should at least know how old he is.”
“Sixteen.”
“So he's still a young vegetable.”
We both burst out laughing, since we were only a year apart in age. To be precise: I celebrated my 17th birthday eleven weeks and three days ago. And on that very day, my mother had met her Reinhardt, fittingly exactly when she had invited me to the movies to celebrate the day. I had just bought a maxi-sized bag of popcorn when a bearded giant of around forty spilled a pint cup of Coke over my trousers. White jeans and black coke – that really doesn't go together. The giant baby was obviously more shocked than I was, at least he had only stammered the beginning of an apology when my mother came rushing up and started to beat him up.
Now, it should be noted that my mother is not particularly tall, and the sight of a 5'5“ woman chewing out a 6'5” man was not without a certain humor. This scene had very quickly attracted the undivided attention of all bystanders, and after a short time I was about the last one to laugh out loud – but certainly a few decibels louder than the rest of the people present. This in turn silenced my mother, and the two main actors looked at each other wordlessly for a moment. A small, energy- and rage-filled woman and a devastated Rambo lookalike. A picture for the gods. This was obviously also clear to my mother, because the angry expression on her face gave way to a broad grin. This in turn confused the poor guy in front of her even more, who now no longer knew what was happening to him.
To cut a long story short: the gentle giant introduced himself as Reinhardt, drove the three of us home (going to the movies in our soaked clothes was out of the question), and then invited us to dinner and to attend the evening performance. Well, and while I rinsed the sticky remains of Coke off my body in the shower, my mother and the culprit apparently got pretty close. When I emerged in the living room in a change of clothes, they were laughing and joking as if they had known each other forever. Which was true! They had gone to school together many years ago and then lost touch. And now this unexpected reunion, under these circumstances. In the weeks that followed, their renewed friendship developed into obvious love, with the result that two families would soon become one. Ha, Cupid himself had probably knocked the coke out of Reinhardt's hand!
Some background information about the family. My father had died in a plane crash a few years ago, and I still missed him every single day. My mother had thrown herself into her work after that, not that she needed to do so financially, but it obviously helped her to keep her mind off her husband and my father. I, on the other hand, didn't get much help, especially at a time when I needed her most, she was hardly ever home before midnight. Fortunately, this only lasted a few weeks until we both realized that it couldn't go on like this and somehow pulled ourselves together. We had a good time together for the last two or three years, and we were reasonably optimistic about the future again. A few months before my last birthday, we had even discussed the topic of “mother plus new man,” and after a few long evenings and sleepless nights, I had come to terms with the fact that this situation would probably happen at some point. That Reinhardt had really been lucky: if he had pulled this stunt on my sixteenth birthday, I would certainly have made life hell for him while he tried to land my mother.
Reinhardt himself was divorced, his wife had run off with a Latin lover without a second thought for her husband and son. That was quite a while ago, and since then Reinhardt had been a single parent. As I said, we got along well, and if my mother felt attracted to a new man, someone like Reinhardt was definitely not a bad choice. He didn't force himself into my life, didn't try to curry favor, but on the other hand was always willing to listen to me, and without treating me condescendingly. But enough of that, I'd better jump back to the current events. Where was I? Oh yes, Thomas wanted to forcibly recruit me and had probably been rebuffed for the first time.
“I'm really sorry, Thomas, but you'll have to manage without me.“
”Like hell you will. But well, at least we won't have to give you any of the income.“
”I'll have to live with that, even if I don't know how I'll manage it yet.”
“Said Rockefeller Jr. Well, anyway. Do you already know how long the family reunion will take? Can you make it to Katja's party?“
”Sh...it, I forgot all about that! Damn, I have no idea if I can make it. Who knows, maybe my mother and Reinhardt have planned some kind of activity for the evening, too.”
“Come on, you just have to come. You're the only one who can make their music system work for the whole house.“
”Oh, is that why you really want me there?”
“Well, that too. But think of the great atmosphere at Katja's parties. Jürgen manages the grill, Lisa gets drinks. There will definitely be at least fifty people there. Oh, and there are bound to be a few cute guys there too.“
I had to grin. Now he had me.
”Okay, okay, I'll try harder.”
“I knew it. Oh, damn, is that the time already? Bye, I have to go pick up my little sister from kindergarten. See you tomorrow!”
And he was gone before I could even utter a reply. As for the cute boys: Well, I'm gay. And I'm pretty much out. (Has anyone ever noticed how stupid it can sound when you mix German and English words?) It wasn't like the whole school knew about me, but all of my friends knew. It hadn't been a completely smooth process, but with the help of Thomas and three or four others, I had made it through. A few former “friends” had turned away from me a bit, but at least they had been willing to keep their mouths shut. So I was now at peace with myself and generally satisfied with my life. Now I just needed a suitable boyfriend. (Haha, just now I was complaining about English language influences, and now I'm using one myself. But what the heck, has anyone noticed that there is no really suitable German translation for this term? I mean, when someone says “That's my boyfriend” in English, everyone immediately knows what is meant, in contrast to “That's my friend.” But in German? “Das ist mein Freund” says everything and nothing at the same time – I mean, Thomas is my friend, but he is not my ‘Freund’. So which word should be used for the purpose of unambiguous identification? Beloved? Fiance? Husband? Life partner? Nothing seems to fit. So if anyone has any ideas, please share them. Otherwise, I'll just leave the boyfriend as it is for now.)
Where was I? Oh yes, pretty boys at parties. Well, I really kept my eyes open, and especially at Katja's famous parties there was always plenty of choice of guys that I would definitely let into my life. However, it had always remained only with looking, because usually a female being belonging to each cute guy emerged soon, and all my hopes went down the drain. I had not yet allowed myself to be too depressed by this, but secretly I hoped that at some point I would not leave such a party alone. I mean, it just couldn't be that all the pretty boys were either straight or already taken, right? Anyway, on my way home, I decided not to miss the upcoming celebration under any circumstances. Somehow I would be able to extricate myself from my family obligations.
Saturday morning. Or rather, Saturday night. That is, Friday night. Whatever. In any case, it was an extremely unchristian hour.
"Danny, rise and shine! Remember, we have plans today.”
I love my mother, really I do, but there were times when I wished she was far, far away. For example, right now. Not even 8:30, and my cozy slumber was rudely ended. And on the weekend, no less! Oh well, turning over onto my other side couldn't hurt. Ah, that pillow was nice and soft...
“Daniel, get up at last, or do I have to get a bucket of cold water?”
Grumble. Daniel, that said it all. If I didn't react now, she really was serious about the cold water. Wouldn't be the first time. Oh yes, by the way, in case someone reads this text out loud: Danny is pronounced the way it is spelled, not Dänny. And woe betide me if I hear someone call me that!
So I had no choice but to grumble as I got out of my warm feathers. Brrr, what a cold snap! It's only the beginning of December, and already there's a heavy frost. I'd either have to close the window overnight or find some thick winter pajamas. With a few quick steps, I was at the window, and while I pushed it closed with my right hand, I turned up the heat to full blast with my left. Then I fled to my well-heated private bathroom, where I performed the usual morning rituals.
Fifteen minutes later, I wandered back to my room, which had now reached a reasonably comfortable temperature. A glance at the outdoor thermometer: minus 8 degrees Celsius. Great. So it was going to be one of those days when I would look twice as bulky in all my warm clothes as in my normal outfit. That's what you get for being frostbitten.
“Danny, are you almost ready? Breakfast is on the table. And dress warmly, it's bitterly cold!"
Someone must have read my mind. Incidentally, this ability runs in the family, I'm quite good at it too. What? Proof? Okay. I'll try to fathom the current thoughts of the esteemed reader. Concentration. A little bit more. Almost there. Right, there it is. What? You gotta be kidding me, the reader is thinking, “This guy, at just seventeen years old, seems like quite the mama's boy.” Thanks for playing, but I'm way above that! If a mummy's boy is defined by getting along well with his mother and respecting and listening to each other instead of constantly shouting and boring each other, well, then I was probably a mummy's boy. Maybe this freshly tapped thought of the reader was just an expression of envy. Exactly, that's what it is.
Oh, by the way, I just realized that I have wasted a lot of words on my family, but not on myself. At least as far as appearances are concerned. Well, my age is already known, I am 1.81 tall (or small, I guess that's a matter of opinion), dark blonde with light highlights, brown eyes. Not fat, not thin, not a muscleman, but not a wimp either. I guess the word “average” describes me best. Which also applies to my performance at school. Although my teachers keep telling me that I could achieve a lot more if I only tried. Ha, that's all I need, to be seen as a nerd too! I'm also reasonably sporty, I'm learning karate and I'm probably quite good at it. In summer, I cycle for miles and miles. Musical preferences: N'Sync, B3, Phil Collins and Mike Oldfield – at least the first two bands are a must for a gay teenager, aren't they? Well, and that's about it, what you need to know about me.
Where was I before I got distracted again? Ah yes, the call for feeding. First, quickly take off my pajamas and put on my first day clothes. “Dress warmly,” my mother had said. In this house, that meant that under a fleece shirt and thermal jeans, a sweatshirt and - anyone who laughs now or brings up the “mama's boy” again will feel my karate skills - knitted tights were also necessary. My mother always insisted on the latter; all my attempts in earlier years to dissuade her had failed miserably. By now, I had resigned myself to her stubbornness in this regard and to the teasing from my fellow students and acquaintances, and for the sake of peace and quiet, I no longer brought up the subject. Apart from the fact that the things are quite practical and anything that kept me warm was most welcome at the bottom of my heart. So I reached for a white sweatshirt and a pair of dark blue tights, put them both on and walked in this outfit to the breakfast table in the kitchen. We always had good heating, and to put on another scarf now would have been nonsense.
“There you are at last.“
”What's the rush? There's still plenty of time, and it's only a ten-minute drive to the swimming pool at most.“
”We're not taking the car, we're walking. After the competition, Reinhardt will drive us home, or we'll do something together. All four of us have to talk about it.”
“Katja is throwing a party tonight, I should show up there by six at the latest.“ Actually only at seven, but a small emergency cushion certainly couldn't hurt.
”Do you really have to go there today?“
”I promised her long before you told me about your plans today.” Well, that wasn't the whole truth, but that must be allowed.
“Is Katja still in love with you?“
The poor thing had actually been after me practically non-stop since the fourth grade.
”I don't think so. After I told her why she'll never have a chance with me, she looked elsewhere. As far as I know, she's also had a boyfriend for a few weeks.”
“Phew, thank God. I mean, she's a nice girl, but not necessarily what I would choose for my son. So superficial and always chasing the latest fashion. Promise me you'll never fall for a male Katja.”
My mother was the first person I had told about my otherness. The time after that was anything but easy, it took many weeks for her to accept it. But when it finally happened, she had made a complete turnaround and now stood completely behind me. Which could sometimes be quite annoying, for example when we were sitting in the ice cream parlor in the summer and she would point out boys to me every few spoonfuls. “Look, Danny, he's quite good-looking, isn't he?” Hmpf, embarrassing. ‘Wouldn't that be exactly your type, Danny?’ And you couldn't say that she whispered this or even tried to keep it to ourselves.
“Don't worry, even if I were into girls, Katja would never have been on my shortlist.“
”I'm relieved to hear that.”
During this conversation, I had gradually stuffed three fresh bakery rolls into myself and emptied two large cups of tea. Fortunately, I didn't have to worry about my figure; I could eat whatever I wanted and I wouldn't get fat. Which was perhaps also due to the fact that I always made sure to get my daily exercise.
As I leaned back in my chair, my mother looked up from her crossword puzzle.
“Well, finally full?” I'm afraid I couldn't afford another eater like you, two of your kind would eat the hair off my head."
She was speaking out of pure envy that she gained half a pound just by looking at a piece of cake.
“Hey, I'm a growing teenager, I need this!“
”All right, all right. I'll quickly put this away, you get dressed, and then we'll go. Let's go!”
I trotted off to my room and completed my outfit there with a pair of blue jeans and a white fleece shirt. A quick glance in the mirror by the wardrobe – yep, I was ready to face the world. With a bold swing, my ID, keys and wallet landed in the designated pockets, and I was ready to go. I went back downstairs, where my mother was already standing in the hallway, squeezing into her coat. Someone was really in a hurry. I slipped into my well-padded shoes and then put on my favorite winter jacket. I had discovered it in a catalog for military clothing; supposedly it was the original polar jacket of the US Navy. In any case, it was wonderfully warm, and with the fur-trimmed hood, I could even do without an additional cap. However, I almost needed a seeing-eye dog, because this hood slid quite far over my eyes. Now gloves on and I was reasonably ready to face the elements.
"Can we go?”
My mother was apparently ready too, she opened the front door and pushed me through it. So the eight degrees below zero were flattering, an icy wind was blowing, and the perceived temperature was certainly well into the minus double digits. In addition, there was a light snowfall. I quickly pulled the hood over my head and was thus as well insulated as possible from the inhospitable outside world.
On the way to the swimming pool, my mother set a remarkable pace, which was particularly surprising because she normally always had to slow me down when we went somewhere together, as she couldn't keep up with her shorter legs. In view of the weather, that was fine with me, of course. Just twenty minutes later, we reached the competition venue, where Reinhardt was already waiting for us. After a brief greeting in front of the door, we went inside, where we first handed in our warm jackets at the coat rack. Reinhardt looked at me.
“So it really is you, Danny. With your disguise, I wasn't so sure.”
I gave him a pained smile. My mother hugged her future husband.
“Let him be, he's never been a fan of freezing temperatures. By the way, where is your son?“
”He's already in the changing rooms with his team. He's got a semi-final race right at the start and will join us later. I've reserved a few good seats, shall we go to the stands?”
So we wandered to our seats in the pleasantly tempered hall, and gradually I began to feel comfortable again. Which was perhaps also due to the fact that all around the pool there were only boys in skimpy swimwear, including some who truly deserved the title “eye candy”. Reinhardt's voice tore me out of my pleasant contemplations.
“Danny, Tim's trainer asked me to record the races of his team on video. Unfortunately, this means that I can't take photos with our own camera. Would you do it for me?"
Taking pictures? Why not, that was one of my hobbies anyway. I had my own little darkroom at home, and I had even won a few small prizes in photo competitions.
“Sure. You just have to explain the camera to me.“
”No problem, you'll probably be fine with it. Look, it's digital, so you don't need film."
Wow, I had been eyeing one of these for a long time! Reinhardt briefly explained to me what I needed to pay attention to, and I probably wouldn't have any problems with it.
“Well, that's actually it. If you want, you can also walk around a bit and look for suitable motifs. Here, put this card around your neck so you can get into the area where only supervisors and the press are allowed.”
This was getting better and better! On many of my photo excursions, I had been annoyed that I was not allowed to get to the really interesting places. The colorful piece of cardboard on the string around my neck would help me overcome this hurdle this time.
"Can I go right away?”
“Go ahead. Here are a few more memory cards. Take as many pictures as you want. There's room for at least 150 pictures on each of these things, so you can really let off steam. Oh yes, here's a set of batteries too.“
”Thanks!” And off I went.
First, I took a few shots of the hall – always keeping a safe distance from the edge of the abyss, that is, the edge of the pool – then I turned more and more to individual details. The mother of a swimmer, who was apparently much more excited than her son. The gray-haired ice cream seller, who wouldn't have a chance of doing business with me again until spring. The speaker who just asked the participants of the first race to gather at the starting line. Time to move there.
My wonderful pass actually got me right to the edge of the pool, where I now recorded the gladiators entering the water. One of them had to be Tim, and I tried to recognize him from the small picture I knew. However, since this was no longer the newest and the swimmers with their wet hair and training clothes looked a bit different, I didn't succeed right away. I had narrowed the circle of suspects down to three when the announcer began introducing the participants. A few names I didn't recognize passed me by, and then it happened.
“On lane four, Tim Bergner, last year's champion and holder of the state record in his age group.”
I had guessed right, it was one of my three candidates. I took a photo of him and then watched as he took off his tracksuit. It would certainly be interesting to see what kind of figure he cut in a skimpy swimsuit. But wait, it seemed that I was not granted this view. What was coming into view then?
When the tracksuit was completely off, I could see in full what Tim was wearing. It was one of those modern swimsuits that covered the body from the shoulders to just above the knees. Speedo Aquablade was on it. I wasn't quite sure whether I should regret this or welcome it. The skin-tight piece of fabric really showed off the muscular body of my future stepbrother. So I quickly took a few more photos, then tore myself away from him and also paid attention to his competitors, of whom another was competing in the same outfit. All swimmers had now been introduced, and the starter called them to the blocks. I took a strategically favorable place from which I intended to photograph the start as authentically as possible. The commands came, the starter raised the pistol, and with the bang of it I pressed the trigger, focusing on the middle lanes and thus also on Tim.
Shortly afterwards, I was rewarded with an obviously very good picture on the control monitor. If that looked half as good in large, I had managed to take a great snapshot. I tore myself away from the monitor and turned my attention back to the race. Damn, what was it all about? I probably should have listened better. Oh yes, 200 meters freestyle. I pointed the camera again, but decided not to take a picture and waited for the swimmers to approach me again after the first turn. Tim and his two neighbors were practically neck and neck, and I took the opportunity to zoom in very close on the three of them and take a series of six pictures. While the camera was saving these, I followed the race, in which Tim now managed to pull ahead a little. The camera was ready to go again in time for the next turn, and I caught my soon-to-be stepbrother in close-up.
Now I was looking for a good place to get the finish line in my sights. A man who was recognizable by his professional equipment as a press photographer spotted my searching look and waved me over to him. He had picked a really good, slightly elevated spot, and I was allowed to set up right next to him. In the meantime, the race was going very well for Tim; at the last turn, he had already swum out a full body length ahead. Now he was approaching the finish line with powerful arm strokes, and I was aiming at the spot of his impending triumph. Just before he touched the wall, I released the shutter and was rewarded when the camera did exactly what it was supposed to at just the right moment. I took a few more shots, including one of Tim climbing out of the pool, dripping wet. When he was completely out of the water, he looked at me intently.
“Hey, isn't that our camera? You must be Danny, right?“
”Exactly. Good race, congratulations. I hope you didn't overexert yourself and saved a little strength for the finals.”
He smiled at me a little uncertainly. Oh oh, that smile, those green eyes! At that moment, I was damn glad not to be standing in front of him in a skin-tight swimsuit like that. My God, that would have been embarrassing!
"Don't worry, I held back a little on purpose.”
Held back? It hadn't looked like that! Just as I was about to tell him that, a guy in a tracksuit turned up.
“Great, Tim, well done. The other finalists are already shaking in their boots. Get in the shower and put some clothes on. Your final is not until one, so you can go to your father's then. But remember: don't eat or drink too much!”
So that was Tim's trainer. He sent his protégé into the changing room with a slap on the backside. I almost did the same, but I managed to pull myself together at the last moment. The man turned to me.
"And who are you, a friend of Tim's?”
“Not yet, but I hope to be. His father and my mother are going to get married.“
”Ah yes. Tim has already told me about that. Then that's your mother sitting up there next to Reinhardt?“
”Exactly. The two thought this would be a good opportunity for Tim and me to get to know each other.”
“In that case, you're welcome to come with me to the changing room, you're practically part of the family.“
Oh no, I'd rather not go through that test. Up close and personal with a bunch of more or less naked guys, no thanks. I mean, yes please! But not necessarily now.
”Thanks for the offer, but I'd rather move on and take a few more pictures.”
“As you wish. The offer stands. Will I get to see the pictures sometime? You recorded Tim's finish, didn't you?“
”I did. As for the pictures, you'll have to ask Reinhardt; it's his camera and I work for him, so to speak.“
”I'll do that. Well, I have to go, it was nice to meet you. Bye.”
“Bye.”
And I was alone again. Alone and quite confused. Wow. No boy had ever made such a huge impression on me at first or even second glance. Okay, I had already realized that Tim had a great body when I saw him on the starting block, but what threw me off the most were his eyes and shy smile. I realized that I had obviously fallen in love.
But wait a minute, help, this can't be true! For heaven's sake, not with this one boy! My future stepbrother, the thought of it almost bordered on incest! Not to mention all the problems that would arise from it. This simply couldn't happen. Lost in these frightening thoughts, I made my way to our grandstand seats.
“Well, Danny, did you manage the camera?“
I woke up from my brooding.
”Uh, yes, thank you. It was actually quite easy.“
”Great. Did you take some good pictures?“
”I think so. Some of the hall, Tim's start and also his finish.“
”Very nice. Did Tim notice?”
“I think so. We also spoke briefly when he came out of the pool.“
”Hm, then you have been tasked with defending the camera against him. Tim doesn't particularly like being photographed, and if you're not careful, he has the ability to delete pictures of him immediately.”
“Sorry, I didn't know that. Otherwise I wouldn't have photographed him.“
”No need to apologize, quite the opposite. Sometimes you have to force him to be happy. Later he will be grateful when he can show the pictures to his children and grandchildren.“
”Well, but I don't want to be blacklisted on his first day.”
“Don't worry, it's not as serious as it sounds. He'll grumble a little, but he won't be really angry with you. Or did he say something like that?“
”No. I congratulated him on his victory, he said he held back a bit and smiled. Then his trainer came and sent him to the locker room.”
“Tim smiled? Wow, then I definitely have to put a red dot on the calendar. Since... well, since his mother left us, he rarely smiles. I think that's a good sign, you'll probably get along well."
Hopefully. And hopefully I didn't ruin everything with my emotional turmoil.
“So, are you going to stay with your mother for a while? I'll check on Tim in the cabin and then bring him over here.“
And off he went. My mother hadn't had a chance to say anything the whole time, which was certainly a new experience for her. So she turned to me after Reinhardt's disappearance.
”So, Danny, be honest. Do you have a good feeling about this?”
Great choice of words. I'd rather not tell her what kind of “feeling” I had about the matter.
“Sure, Mommy. We'll work it out together. And if not, we'll just see who has the stronger arguments: a swimmer or a karateka.”
She looked deep into my eyes.
“Do you always have to make everything funny? This is a serious matter.“
”Don't worry, really. Tim seems okay, he didn't go for my throat and didn't give me the impression of rejecting or even hating me. He's probably just as resigned to the new family circumstances as I am.”
“Just resigned? Nothing more?“
”Hey, don't expect too much at once. Reinhardt is nice, and I'm happy for you, but only time will tell how all this will affect my life. In any case, I'm willing to give him every chance. And Tim, of course, too.”
“Sorry, Danny. It means a lot to me that you're giving us this chance. I know it's not easy, especially for you guys. I mean, Reinhardt and I have found each other, we love each other – but you guys are more or less thrown together without really knowing or knowing each other. We're asking a lot of you.”
“Don't worry, everything will be fine. By the way, have you talked to Reinhardt about tonight yet?“
”Not yet, we can discuss that when the four of us are together. Maybe at lunch.“
”Okay.”
At that moment, the two objects of desire, my mother's (Reinhardt) and mine (Tim), approached and sat down with us. Tim's hair was dry again and I could see its actual color: an almost white blonde, with a few green(!!) highlights. He was wearing a tracksuit from his club and white basketball shoes. My mother, who was the only one who hadn't seen him today, greeted him and congratulated him on his victory. Again, the shy smile was on his face, and he thanked her with his head slightly bowed. He didn't seem to be an example of self-confidence.
The announcer announced the next race, in which two swimmers from Tim's team would be competing again. Reinhardt grabbed the video camera to do his job.
"I still have to film the next two races, after that nothing more will happen that I need to record until Tim's final. What do you think about all of us going to the Sportlerklause for dinner?”
He received general approval. Shortly thereafter, the race was started, and two minutes later, both of Tim's teammates had been eliminated. He seemed to be more or less the only figurehead of his club, because in the next race, only one of his colleagues managed to qualify for the final. The loud cheers from the stands freed me from the need to make a big show of conversation; I just looked in Tim's direction every now and then, very cautiously and a little unsure of myself, and caught him doing the same a few times in my direction. Whether this was because I had captivated him with my super body and outstanding personality, or whether it was simply a little nervousness towards the future “big brother” – well, who could say?
Then it was time to make our way towards the feeding trough. Reinhardt packed the camera, and we all rose from our seats.
"You three go ahead, Tim knows the way. I'll quickly drop the camera off at the trainer's, I don't feel like lugging it around with me.”
We did as we were told and set off. Our march was more or less silent, although my mother tried a few times to engage Tim in conversation, but she only ever got monosyllabic answers and then gave up. This continued in the restaurant, where, to our great surprise, we immediately found a free table for four. Then my mother couldn't take it anymore.
“Well, Tim, that was a really great performance you showed there. How long have you been swimming, anyway?“
”About eight years. And I'm really not that good.“
”But it looked different earlier. You were a lot better than the others in your race.“
”Thanks.” Finally, the corners of his mouth pointed slightly upwards again. Let's see if that could be strengthened a little.
“She's absolutely right. You might even be able to beat me."
My mother snorted, and Tim looked back and forth between us in confusion. When my mother had calmed down somewhat, she explained my somewhat strange relationship to the wet element to Tim. And then she felt obliged to make a comment about my performance in this regard.
“To beat Danny, you'd have to get him into the water first! And if you then hung a hundredweight of lead on your body and gave Danny half the distance as a head start, well, then there would be a risk that you would lose to him, at least not completely.”
Of course I couldn't let that sit entirely uncommented and turned to my mother in well-played outrage.
"Come on, I'm really not that bad. I would have a chance against him too, if only he had to lug half a hundredweight of lead around. If he would just give me three quarters of the lead.”
Now we had made it with combined forces, Tim burst out laughing, which drew the attention of the neighboring tables to us. Appropriately, Reinhardt came to our table at that moment, who obviously enjoyed the sight of his tearfully laughing son.
"I see the ice has broken. What's so funny here, Tim?”
“It's about Danny's swimming skills.“
”Exactly, I was just about to give Tim a few crucial tips on how he could improve his technique to stand a chance against me in the pool.“
”But that was very kind of you.“
”Well, that's one of the tasks of a big brother, isn't it?”
Tim, who had calmed down a little in the meantime, burst out laughing again at this exchange, while Reinhardt and my mother looked at each other with pleasure and relief. My mother turned to Reinhardt's son.
“Tim, it's self-service here, do we two want to go and get food and drinks for all of us?”
Reinhardt intervened.
“Leave it to me, Maria, I'll take care of it.“
”No way, Reinhardt. Look at Danny, he's wearing a fresh white shirt, he certainly doesn't need any cola stains on it.“
”Well, I'm not that clumsy!“
”Nevertheless, we'd rather not take any risks. Agreed, Tim?”
“Sure. Dad, Danny, what do you want to eat and drink?“
While Reinhardt placed his order, I quickly scanned the menu. Ah yes, there was something that suited my taste. Tim had meanwhile finished with his father and was now looking at me questioningly.
”I'll have the gipsy schnitzel with fries, and a large Spezi.“
”As you wish, sir.”
Then the two temporary waiters left, leaving Reinhardt and me alone at the table. He (Reinhardt, not the table!) looked at me briefly and intently, then smiled.
"You two did a good job with Tim, thank you. It's been ages since I've seen him so happy. I'm sorry if the joke was at your expense.”
“It was worth it. He seemed like he could use a little cheering up.“
”You've got that right.“
”Is he always so reserved? I don't just mean now, to a stranger like me, but in general. My mother praised his running, but he acted like he wasn't nearly as good as she made him out to be.”
“That's a big problem. Since his mother left, well, he's been in a real crisis ever since. Not so much physically as mentally; he believes it was his fault that he's just not good enough and good for nothing. No matter how many people congratulate him on his achievements, he simply doesn't believe them. Damn it, the boy is the state champion, will probably be again this year, but he didn't want to participate in the championship at all because he was convinced he wasn't good enough. He seems to have lost all self-confidence.“
”Stupid situation. What can you do?”
“Not much, except to prove him wrong again and again. I consider what happened earlier a good sign. As I said, it's been a long time since I've seen him have such a fit of laughter. So, thanks again!“
”Don't mention it. After all, we're family now, or at least we'll be family soon. I'm going to go after the two of them, they can hardly carry everything by themselves.”
“Should I go? Or at least come with you?“
”Nah, you better guard the table. Besides, I like my shirt the way it is, that is to say: white.“
”Huh, not you too! Off you go!”
I set off and caught my mother and Tim at just the right moment, just as they had paid at the checkout and were about to make their way to our table with three trays. I grabbed one of the trays, and when my mother realized who the cheeky thief was, she was relieved.
“You're a godsend, I have no idea how the two of us would have gotten this away!“
”I'm not sent by heaven, but by my own ingenious intuition that exactly this would happen. I will not risk my food landing on the floor because of the weakness of the staff.“
”Oh, thank you, you too!”
But she laughed at her words. Such banter was the order of the day for us. The three of us now pushed our way back to our table, where Reinhardt had heroically defended the empty seats against the ever-increasing crowds. Phew, we made it, and without any casualties! Luckily, because I was ravenously hungry by now, and so I pounced on my meal without much preamble, which I consumed in record time. Afterwards, I sat back contentedly and watched the other three eat.
My mother had, as so often, only a salad and a glass of mineral water, Reinhardt was working on a roulade, with a glass of beer for company, and Tim was content with a potato soup and a glass of orange juice. When everyone had finished eating, my mother brought up the subject of the rest of the day.
“Reinhardt, do you already have any plans for what we could do after Tim's final race?“
”No, not yet, but I thought it would be better if we all discussed it together.“
”Good thinking. Danny already has plans for this evening. A friend is throwing one of her famous parties and he doesn't want to miss it.”
“Too bad, I had actually hoped that we would do something together, especially so that the boys could get to know each other a little better."
Hm, I really didn't want to disappoint him, but I didn't want to miss Katja's party either. Wait a minute, what was that, was an idea crawling through my brain? Wow, that could be the solution.
“I'm really sorry, Reinhardt, but the party was planned a long time ago. But I have an idea: Why doesn't Tim just come with me? We could keep snooping on each other, and you two would have a free evening.“
”I don't know. Maria, what do you think? What kind of parties are they?”
“Don't worry, Reinhardt, the troop is a bit freaky, but completely harmless. I think it's actually a good idea, Tim will meet a few of Danny's friends, and the two of them can get along without us two old folks constantly stepping on their toes.“
”If you think so. Tim, what do you say?”
“I don't know. I don't want to impose. Who knows if Danny's friends even want me there.“
”Don't worry about that, they want you. Especially the girls!“
”But they'll all be older than me.”
“Not all of them. Most of them are seventeen or eighteen, but there will also be a few people your age. They're mostly younger siblings, and we always invite them along. As long as they're not too young. Anyway, how much older am I than you? Six months, nine months? It really doesn't make that much of a difference.“
”Okay, if you say so.”
“Hey, don't be so gloomy! I promise you'll have a good time.”
Maybe that was what he was afraid of, because he looked at me with a pained expression, even a little afraid. But I wasn't going to let him off the hook now. Aside from the fact that I really liked him, what Reinhardt had told me in private had left a certain impression. I mean, when my father died, that was bad enough, but at least we knew that it was a tragic accident and that none of us could have changed it. Tim, on the other hand, apparently blamed himself for his “mother” leaving him and his father, and I could vividly imagine what was going on in his cute head.
“Good, that's settled then. What time does Tim have to be home?“
I looked at his father. Reinhardt shrugged, though.
”Tim hasn't been a big party-goer so far, I have no idea. Maria, what do you think?”
“Well, it's Saturday, so let him off the leash a little. One should be sufficient, Katja's parties are usually over by that time anyway.“
”Great. Now we just have to decide where I can pick him up. I don't want him wandering the streets in the middle of the night, especially alone.”
“He could stay in our guest room, which would only be a five-minute walk from the party, and he would be walking with Danny.“
”That sounds reasonable, Maria, thanks for the offer. So it's a deal. And what are we two old folks doing tonight?“
”I don't know, didn't you once mention something about a new pub around the corner?”
“The Hotchkins? Good idea, I wanted to try that anyway."
Reinhardt looked at my mother, and you could see his gray cells working.
“Tell me, boys, can we rely on you two? It may be late for Maria and me, and I think it would be a good idea if she spent the night with us. But then we have to be sure that everything is going well with you. What do you say?”
I looked at Tim, Tim at me. He shrugged his shoulders. That was enough encouragement for me.
"Go ahead, I said you'd get a free evening. And I'll take care of the little one.”
The last sentence earned me an extended middle finger from the aforementioned person, but at the same time a slight smile, which betrayed that this gesture was not meant too seriously. Then Tim turned to his father.
"Hey, Dad, then we have to stop by our place later, I don't have the right stuff for a party or stuff to stay overnight.”
He was right about that, and Reinhardt saw it too.
"No problem. After your victory, we'll drive to our place, you'll grab a few things, then I'll invite you all to have coffee at the Italian restaurant, and then we'll drop you two young'uns off at Maria's place. Agreed?”
There were no objections. Now that we had all been fed and the big palaver had been successfully concluded, we left the hospitable restaurant and returned to our grandstand seats. Tim went straight to the changing room; his final race would be announced in half an hour. I prepared the camera for action again, changed memory card and batteries, and went off to capture more pictures. While I was walking away from the other two at a leisurely pace, I caught a word of how happy they were that everything had gone so harmoniously. Well, what can I say, I was very pleasantly surprised myself. Although there was hardly a chance that Tim would return my deeper feelings – I also liked him as a brother, I could have done a lot worse. Now I just had to wait and see what would come of it.
Half in thought, half taking pictures, I didn't notice how quickly time passed, and soon Tim's race was called. I hurried to get a good place at the starting line in time. There he was, standing on the starting block in his chic blue swimsuit, I just had time to focus on him before the starting shot was fired.
During the next minute and a half, I took a few more pictures, mostly with Tim in the center. He justified the attention paid to him by swimming an extremely good race in which he never gave his opponents even the slightest chance. When he crossed the finish line, he was more than two body lengths ahead and had set a new national record. The spectators went wild, especially two particular spectators, of course, and I was thrilled too. Fortunately, my strategically chosen position meant that I was one of the first people to congratulate Tim after he climbed out of the pool. He now looked a bit more self-confident, as if he had proved to himself that he was not that bad after all.
After the next race, my mother and Reinhardt had come to see the award ceremony up close. Of course, I was there with the camera. Tim received his medal and a rather large trophy, and he beamed from ear to ear. A sight that in turn brought tears of joy to his father's eyes. His son really seemed to mean an extremely great deal to him, which was exactly how it should be. Good prospects for the future, that is, if he would feel at least a fraction of that way about me over time. It was impossible to miss the fact that my mother had already taken Tim to her heart.
When Tim left the podium, he immediately rushed over to us and also received the congratulations he was due from the other two. When Reinhardt told him how proud he was of him, Tim couldn't hold back the tears either, and the two hugged each other fiercely. My mother put her arm around my shoulder (not so easy given the size difference) and smiled happily to herself. She seemed quite satisfied with the way the day had gone so far.
Afterwards, the hero of the day went to the changing room to change his tracksuit for something more appropriate. Fifteen minutes later, we all met in the foyer by the cloakroom. Tim appeared all in black, black turtleneck, black jeans, black jacket, with equally black gloves and a cap in the same color.
"I'm ready, let's go.”
“Did you dry your hair properly?“
”I did, don't worry. I don't want to catch something just before Christmas.“
In the meantime, we had also retrieved our jackets and coats, and I slipped into my outer line of defense. Tim looked me up and down.
”Cool jacket.”
“Thanks. And it's really warm!“
”Tim, you have to remember: Danny and freezing temperatures are like fire and water, they just don't go together.“
Tim and Reinhardt laughed. Thanks, Mom.
”Mock if you will, but freeze."
We headed for the exit, and I pulled the hood over my head.
“Are you sure that with this outfit you don't fall under the disguise ban?“
”So what? Tim, with you we could never take the tram for it, they would immediately fish you out as a fare dodger.“
”Touché.“
”Well, at least you can never get lost if you fall into a snowdrift.”
Now we all laughed, and two minutes later we had reached Reinhardt's car. A dark green Chrysler Stratus, not bad. I had always had a preference for American cars, and even if it wasn't a Viper or a Corvette, it was definitely better than the everyday German counterparts.
After a five-minute drive, the temperature in the car was slowly becoming pleasant, and I leaned back relaxed into the cushions. Fifteen minutes later, which was mainly filled with uninterrupted conversation between my mother and Reinhardt, we reached our destination, a newly renovated old building. Reinhardt turned off the engine.
“You'll come in for a few minutes, won't you?"
Since I knew from personal experience how quickly a car cooled down in the prevailing outside temperatures, this offer was very convenient for me. We got out and entered the house, where we had to overcome a height difference of three floors before we stood in front of the apartment door with the nameplate ‘Bergner’. Reinhardt opened the door and, like a concierge at a luxury hotel, guided us past him into the hallowed halls. Halls, by the way, was quite appropriate – large rooms, high ceilings, a full-grown bowling alley would have found enough space in the corridor without much difficulty. I would have to talk to my mother about this topic at a suitable opportunity. If we were to move in together, it would hopefully be in our house and not here, as nice as the apartment was.
We took off our jackets and coats and slipped out of our snow-wet shoes – which presented Reinhardt with a minor problem.
“Excuse me, but we don't have any guest slippers at the moment, I entrusted the old ones to the dumpster last week. Is that a problem?“
We two guests looked at each other, then at the carpeted floor, then we shook our heads.
”No, Reinhardt, not really.”
“Very nice. Tim, will you pack a few things? We'll be waiting for you in the living room.“
”Okay, I'm on my way."
He made his way to the lower levels of the apartment, and while Reinhardt opened the living room door for my mother, I looked after his son. He stopped after a few steps, paused briefly, and then turned to us.
“Danny, do you want to come to my room?“
I certainly wouldn't want to miss this opportunity, but I tried not to show my enthusiasm for the invitation too clearly.
”Sure, why not?"
I followed Tim to the end of the long corridor, where he opened a door with a large prohibition sign to keep uninvited visitors out. Well, I didn't seem to fit that description, so I fearlessly followed him into his private chambers. His room was much smaller than I had expected, judging by the scale of the other rooms I had already seen. My astonishment must have been obvious.
“What's the matter, don't you like it?”
"No, no, I just thought of something bigger.”
The room was considerably smaller than my own. At most half the size, although almost twice as high. But it was very comfortably furnished, in one corner by the window was a sofa bed, which served as a bed at night and as a seat upholstered with many pillows during the day. Opposite was a small wall unit with a fold-out desk, a small TV and a stereo system. Behind glass, a good dozen trophies and even more medals. In addition, there was a wardrobe and a few shelves. Various posters hung on the walls, but I couldn't quite figure out their combination. I mean, how do Lara Croft and the Backstreet Boys go together? I turned back to my host, who was now answering my unspoken question.
“I could have had a bigger room, but I like it better this way. It's somehow cozier when you can't get lost in your own room. The next bigger room is three times as big, I wouldn't even know what to put in there.“
”Funny, but the word cozy just came to mind, too."
Tim smiled at me (apparently relieved).
“It's best if you sit on the couch while I pack my bag.”
I did as I was told, and before Tim put his announcement into action, he turned on the radio, where the Spice Girls, whom I didn't particularly admire, were performing. The couch was even more comfortable than it looked, and I took the opportunity to put my feet up a little after standing at the edge of the pool for so long.
Meanwhile, Tim had taken out a gym bag and was now starting to pack a variety of things into it from several compartments and drawers. Initially, I tried to follow his actions, but at some point the short night before took its toll, and I must have actually fallen asleep.
"Danny? Hey, Danny, wake up!”
“Hm... What? Oh crap, sorry, I must have dozed off. What were you saying?“
Now Tim wasn't smiling at me, no, he was grinning mockingly! Okay, I guess I had deserved that.
”I wanted to know if there was any kind of dress code for the party. What should I wear?”
“Whatever you want, as long as you don't show up stark naked – which wouldn't be recommended at these temperatures anyway – anything goes.“ Huh, my mind must not have been fully present, otherwise I certainly wouldn't have let that slip. Although, the idea... Tim stark naked... not that bad.
”What are you going to wear?”
“I'm not sure yet. Maybe white jeans and a blue shirt. Let's see what's in the closet.“
”I have something like that too. Would you mind if I wore it?“
”No problem. It doesn't bother me, but I would recommend that you never show up at a party in the same dress as my mother. She can get pretty nasty about it.”
“It's good that you're telling me, I'll be careful. Fortunately, I have a wide selection of clothes, so there should always be something that is very different from what she wears."
Oops, the little one had a sense of humor! Very good. We looked at each other and burst out laughing. When we had calmed down, Tim looked at me a little uncertainly.
“What do you think, should I change right now or just before the party at your place?“
”I guess at my place is better. Especially safer. Your father still wants to take us all out for Italian food, and there are a lot of things there that he can spill over us.”
Tim didn't seem to mind the little dig at his father; on the contrary, he was on the verge of bursting out laughing again. But he pulled himself together.
"You're right, that wouldn't be so great. So I'd better pack everything up.”
And that's exactly what he did. Shortly afterwards, he disappeared for a moment and came back with a smaller bag, which probably contained his toiletries. He then put these in his large gym bag.
“Well, that's everything, I'm ready to go.”
"Then I guess we should see what our old folks are up to.”
With a bit of melancholy, I said goodbye to the comfortable couch and left Tim's room, with Tim in tow. Loud laughter came from the living room, and after a short knock, we entered.
“Dad, I'm ready.”
“Do you have everything you need?”
"I think so.”
“And if he has forgotten something, it's not a problem, Danny can help him with anything.“
”Well, if you think so. Let's go, the Italian restaurant is waiting."
We left the house, got into the car, and five minutes later we were where we wanted to go. We found a nice place by the window and studied the menu. Fortunately for me, they not only had ice cream but also a large selection of cakes and pies. I decided on a cheesecake and a hot chocolate, and, surprisingly, Tim went with my choice. We didn't have to wait long before our order was served.
Generously, Reinhardt refrained from dirtying other people's clothing and limited himself to decorating his own shirt with a coffee stain – which earned him a pained look from my mother.
"Well Reinhardt, if we move in together, I refuse to constantly wash your stained clothes! How can such a big guy be such a klutz!”
“I plead guilty, but I refer to mitigating circumstances. Just look at the cup handle, it's not for such big hands.”
She had to admit that he was right, and the rest of the coffee klatch went peacefully and without further damage. After that, it wasn't long before Tim and I were dropped off at our house. The usual mixture of farewells and admonitions followed.
"So, here we are. You boys behave yourselves, we're counting on you, understand?”
“Sure, Mom, don't worry.“
”Hm.“ She pulled me aside and lowered her voice. ‘Take care of Tim, don't let him sit around all alone at the party. He doesn't seem to be the type to approach others on his own.’
”Don't worry, I'll make sure he has a good time, too.”
We went back to the other two, where Reinhardt was just telling his son what to do.
“Well, Tim, have fun. And remember, Danny's in charge. If he tells you something, listen to it, okay?”
Hm, that sounded promising. Although I would definitely not take advantage of it. Never. Honestly.
"Got it.”
A few more brief parting words, and the two adults drove off. I looked at my ward.
“So, we've got rid of the two lovebirds. Come in.”
I opened the front door and pushed Tim into the hallway.
“The coat rack is on the left, hang up.”
"Where can I put my wet shoes?”
“There's a rubber mat right behind you. Put them on it."
While I flung my jacket on a hanger, Tim took off his shoes, and it became clear once again that our corridor was a bit too narrow for two people to use it. That is to say, we kept bumping into each other. When Tim then wanted to push past me to the wardrobe, I stopped him.
“Wait a minute, it's not going to work like this. Give me your jacket, I'll take care of it.“
”Thanks, it's probably better that way.“
When finally all the jackets and shoes were where they belonged, I led Tim to the stairs.
”Go up already, my room is the second door on the left.“
”And what about you?”
“I'll be right up, I just want to get something from the kitchen. Now that your father is gone, it shouldn't be too dangerous to open a bottle of Coke. Do you want a glass too?“
”Sure, thanks.”
Tim dragged his bag up the stairs, and I took a maxi-bottle of Coke and two glasses from the fridge. With my supplies in hand, I followed Tim towards my room.
My future little brother had left his bag there and was taking a look around. As already mentioned, my room was considerably larger than his and was distinguished, among other things, by a large-screen TV and a computer system with two printers, a scanner, a slide scanner and a 19-inch monitor. Tim, however, had noticed something quite different.
“Tell me, why do you have two beds?“
There were actually two such pieces of furniture in the room, and there was a good reason for that.
”The left one more or less belongs to Thomas, my best friend. He's been staying here fairly regularly for about ten years – no wonder, he has an older brother and three younger sisters and is always happy to get out of the chaos for a night or two.”
“I don't know, I always wanted brothers and sisters. It's no fun being all alone."
I hadn't really thought about it much. I didn't mind being alone that much, and as I said, Thomas was a frequent guest.
“Well, it looks like your wish will come true after all. I can't offer you a sister, but I'm available as a brother.“
”Well, I was thinking more of a younger brother, but I guess I'll be able to live with that.”
Tim smiled at these words, so I didn't worry about it any further.
“So this is Thomas' bed, and I thought I would sleep here.”
"Would you like to? Mom said something about a guest room, but if you want, you can also sleep here. We just have to change the bedding.”
“If I'm not getting on your nerves too much, I'd actually prefer to stay here. Please don't laugh at me, but this is the first time in ages that I've stayed in a stranger's house, and then all alone in a stranger's room... well, I'll have to get used to that first.”
“No problem. Besides, it's probably more fun with two of us. If you want, you can take your toiletries to the bathroom, which is the door next to the closet. I'll take care of the bedding in the meantime."
Tim took his bag and opened the door in question, only to turn to me a moment later, wide-eyed.
“You have your own bathroom? Complete with shower and tub?“
”Yep. After I got in the way of my mother more and more often, she had an extra bathroom installed without further ado.“
”Great.” And he disappeared into the aforementioned sanctuary.
I, on the other hand, grabbed all the bedding from Thomas' bed and transported it to the guest room to exchange it with the bedding there. When I returned to my room, I tried my best to make the bed look as perfect as it had before, but to be honest, I wasn't very good at it. Thomas, on the other hand, was – well, let's put it this way: both the Bund and his future wife would have been delighted with him. As I made the last more or less unsuccessful attempts, Tim came out of the bathroom again.
“Well, everything stowed?“
”Yes. You're really a lucky guy, having a huge bathroom all to yourself. When I think of home... Especially in winter, it's stupid if you have to go to the bathroom at night, it always means a hike across the freezing corridor.”
“Well, as the saying goes, my toilet is your toilet. At least tonight you will be spared such an unpleasant journey.“
”Thanks. With such advantages, I might even get used to an older brother.“
”I should hope so, our parents are relying on us.”
“It won't be me. By the way, when do we have to leave? Should I change already?“
”We have plenty of time, we don't have to be at Katja's until seven, so it's enough if we start marching around a quarter to eight.“
Tim looked at the clock. Just before four.
”And what do we do with all that time now?”
“Well, I don't know what you're doing, but I'm going to jump in the shower for now.“
”What, I thought you were afraid of water?“
”That only applies to deeper waters; I have no objection to a nice hot shower. By the way, you've already had your fair share of water today, but if you want, you can have another go at me.”
“Hm. Thanks for the offer, but I don't really feel like showering at the moment.“
”No problem, it was just a suggestion.“
”Uh, without wanting to appear intrusive, but...“
Tim stopped mid-sentence.
”Go on, spit it out, I'll tell you if you get too intrusive."
Which, however, I could hardly imagine.
“Well, my bones are aching a little, and a hot bath is the best thing for that. So if it's not too much trouble...“
”Absolutely not. When I come from karate training, that's my favorite thing to do, too.“
”Thank you.“
”No problem.”
I went to my closet and took out a few extra large bath towels.
"Here, take these for now.”
Then I took some fresh underwear from my wardrobe and put it in the bathroom. Now came the big question: where should I undress? In the bathroom? Well, that would seem a bit silly to me now. In the room? In front of the boy I had a more or less intense crush on? Not the best idea either. I decided to take the middle ground. I would undress in the room down to my underwear, and then do the rest in the bathroom. I opened the straps of my dungarees and let them fall down. Then I pulled the fleece shirt over my head. Then came the moment of truth: I let the jeans slide down my legs. Tim didn't pay much attention to that, but continued to look around the room with interest. He had just discovered my CD collection and was studying it in detail. I put my undressed clothes on a chair and headed for the bathroom.
"So, I'm off. If you want, feel free to put on some music or whatever. If anything comes up, just come in, I can't hear you calling or knocking from outside anyway with the rushing water.”
“Okay.” Without turning his head to me. I disappeared into the bathroom.
Once there, I first slipped out of the rest of my clothes, stuffed them into the laundry basket, then I laid out my toiletries, adjusted the water temperature to a comfortable level and finally jumped under the water jet, pulling the shower cubicle door closed behind me.
As usual, I completely forgot about time and my surroundings while standing under the shower. There was hardly anything more pleasant for me than the warm water running down my back. I was content with myself and the world, but suddenly there was a knock on the frosted glass of the shower cubicle.
"Danny?”
“Yes, what is it?“
”Sorry to bother you, but do you mind if I turn on the tub?“
”Go ahead, I'll be done in a minute anyway.“
”Don't worry, I don't want to rush you. Stay as long as you want.”
Actually, I should really finish my shower orgy now, but on the other hand... While it was so pleasant. And again, I was startled some time later by Tim.
"Do you mind if I get into the tub?”
I looked at my waterproof watch. Oops, I had actually been in the shower for half an hour! Not particularly hospitable. And now I would see Tim naked, and he would see me too! But what the heck, after all, it was he who had the idea, not me.
"Go ahead. Sorry I'm dawdling.”
“No problem, I often forget the time when I'm doing things like that, too.”
While I now reached for the shower gel and lathered myself thoroughly, I saw Tim's shadow through the frosted glass, walking to the tub and then getting in. Shortly thereafter, a satisfied groan was heard. I now hurried with my tasks, and five minutes later I was pondering how best to slip out of the shower cubicle and bathroom. I didn't come to any real conclusion. So I rinsed myself off thoroughly once more, then turned off the tap, opened the cubicle door and stepped out. I benefited from the fact that Tim couldn't really see me from where he was standing, between us was the shower cubicle and its outward-opening door. So I could feel more or less safe from his gaze and dry myself undisturbed. However, my clothes were at the other end of the bathroom, and I would soon have to leave the privacy screen. Well, there was still another possibility. I tied one of the large bath towels around my hips and wandered into Tim's field of vision.
"Well, little brother, is it nice?”
I dared to glance in his direction, without really seeing anything, because with the exception of his head, his entire body was hidden under a thick layer of foam.
"Thanks, big brother. Just wonderful. I can already feel my muscles relaxing.”
“That's good. Stay in there as long as you want, I'll let you know in time so we can leave on time.“
”Okay. I'll try not to fall asleep.”
I grabbed my stuff from the stool and left the bathroom. It was now just before five, so still way too early to get all dressed up for the party. So I just slipped into my fresh clothes, which, like in the morning, consisted of a t-shirt and tights (I guess that's what you call a well-trained son). Let's see how Tim would react to that.
Once that was done and I had quickly dried my hair, I sat cross-legged in my computer chair and started up the Mac. I wanted to use the time that Tim spent in the tub to quickly check my e-mails. The computer booted up, and a few minutes later I was absorbed in answering a technical call for help from a classmate. I only noticed that Tim had got out of the tub and back into the room when he addressed me directly.
“I'm back. That was just wonderful, exactly what I needed.”
“Very nice. It doesn't surprise me with a water rat like you.”
"I'm just like that. Even as a small child, I jumped into every puddle.”
“I certainly hope that you have since given up this habit.“
”I think so. At least it hasn't happened to me in the last three months.“
I turned around in my chair and looked in Tim's direction. He was standing in the room, wearing only a pair of boxer shorts, and looking around.
”Do you have a hair dryer anywhere?”
I pointed to my bed, where the said device was lying half-covered by the pillow. To get to it, Tim now had to pass me, and I was able to admire his swimmer's body at close range. And “admire” was the right word. Although it was already December, the remains of a summer tan were still present, and his smooth skin was not marred by any hairs or other disturbing things. Luckily, my loosely hanging T-shirt covered a certain region of my body. It was precisely these lower parts of my body that Tim, who had stopped in front of me at a distance of one meter, was now staring at. However, as his next words showed, he had something other than my stated problem in mind.
"Say, what are you wearing?”
Although I knew exactly what he meant, I decided to play a little uncomprehending.
“A T-shirt, why?”
“Nonsense. I mean down below. These are tights, aren't they?”
“Oh, that. Yes, you're right.”
"And you wear something like that?”
“Not entirely voluntarily, my mother insists on it.“
”Well, I would never go along with that.“
I had an idea, he shouldn't feel too safe.
”Just wait and see, when we're a family, this instruction will also apply to you, you can count on it.“
”Never! If necessary, I'll talk to my father about it, he'll talk her out of it.”
“I wouldn't be so sure about that. My mother can be damn stubborn, and knowing her, after such a conversation between the two of them, not only you but also your father will be walking around in those things.“
”I really can't imagine that.“
”Believe it. But it's not quite that bad, at least the things are nice and warm.“
”That seems to be the most important thing for you.”
“Exactly. If you can't avoid winter, then at least I don't want to freeze. And now don't tell me that you only walk around in jeans in the cold.“
”Nope, I never said that.”
Tim went on to get the hair dryer, then he returned to “his” bed and sat down on it, reaching for a pile of clothes that I only noticed now.
"Thermal underwear. Just between us, I don't like to freeze either. Besides, my father would never let me go out without something on underneath. But he would never think of getting me tights.”
“Well, that's more of a mother's domain. We'll see. Either I'll be allowed to wear something like you in the future, or you'll soon find a stack of tights in your linen closet. I'm afraid, though, that the latter will happen, the odds are about 10:1.”
Tim grumbled something into his non-existing beard and started to put on the aforementioned long underwear. I watched him do it, and a few moments later he was dressed in light blue from top to bottom. He added a pair of thick socks. At this sight, another question occurred to me that had been burning under my fingernails since the swimming competition.
“Tell me, do these swimsuits really work? I mean, okay, you won, that should be proof enough, but still...“
”As you may have noticed, someone else was wearing one of those suits in my semi-final, and he only came in second to last.“
”Hm, that's right, I'd forgotten that.”
“But seriously: my trainer thinks that you have to believe in it for it to work. I believe in it, and as you can see, it seems to be working. Besides, there's something else behind it: our team is being provided with swimming and training clothes by the sponsor in return for me wearing the suit.“
”That's quite an incentive, though.”
“Exactly. We are neither a particularly large nor a particularly good club and have to count on the money quite a bit. Of course, an offer like that comes in handy.“
”Well, if you keep winning like this, the status of your club will probably change for the better soon. And don't start again with the fact that you're not that good. Finally believe what everyone else is telling you. Or can't you get it into your head?”
Tim looked down sheepishly.
“Maybe you are right after all. It's just... well, I guess I'm pretty critical of myself.”
"You're not being critical, you're being overly strict. But we'll get rid of that in you yet.”
Now Tim laughed, and I leaned back contentedly in my chair. I just couldn't get enough of this sight. He reached for the hair dryer, then looked back in my direction. And his gaze froze! Well, I thought he was over the pantyhose thing? But wait a minute, he wasn't staring at me, he was staring past me. But at what? Holy shit! I suddenly realized what had shocked him. I hadn't paid the computer the attention it deserved for a few minutes, with the result that the screensaver had activated. And this consisted of a slide show. To be precise, it was a slideshow of rather explicit and revealing pictures that I had downloaded from the internet during long nights. In a fraction of a second, I turned to the computer and moved the mouse to stop the screensaver. Sure, covering the well after the child has fallen into it. Good work, Danny. I didn't dare to turn back to Tim.
A period of time passed that seemed like an eternity to me, but probably only lasted a few minutes, if not just seconds. Then Tim found his voice again.
"Um, Danny, are you gay?”
Well, what should I answer to that? I thought feverishly, but there was no way out in sight. There was hardly anything to cover up or to deny. This was probably the end of my so hopefully begun friendship with my future little brother. Without turning around to him, I answered him in a low voice.
“Seems that way, doesn't it?“
”Indeed.“
”And?“
”What?“
”Well, are you angry, shocked, disgusted? I assume you no longer want to sleep in this room. I'll change the bedding again.“
”Not so fast, okay? I have to figure this out for myself first.”
Hm, could there still be some hope? Okay, I knew that I didn't stand a chance with him, but I would be completely satisfied if he would accept me as a brother and a friend. I gathered all my courage and turned to him. I saw an expression on Tim's face that I had never seen before. He wasn't smiling, nor was he angry, and I couldn't make out the pronounced introspection that was still there in the morning. Then he looked directly at me, and it was extremely difficult for me to withstand that gaze.
"Let's see, I'll still sleep in the room anyway. That is, if you don't mind.”
“Absolutely not, but... I mean, will you be okay with that?“
”Don't worry about it. Besides, I don't need to be afraid of you attacking me during the night, do I?"
I'd rather not tell him how much I would like to do just that. Besides, it was clear to me that I would resist that at all costs.
“You can be sure of that, I'm not a danger to you.“
”Why not?“
I thought I had misheard.
”Huh?“
”I mean, do you think I'm ugly or why am I not a danger to you?"
I had to digest that for a moment. And then I decided to be reasonably honest with him.
“Uh, Tim, I really don't think you're ugly, quite the opposite. But I can guarantee you that I would never, ever do anything against your will.“
”I'm relieved to hear that. I thought there was something about me that repelled you.“
”Really not.”
However, there was one thing I really needed to know, as his question had raised some doubts in me.
“Tell me, Tim, please don't freak out, but... are you gay too?”
He stared at me silently for a minute.
"You don't have to answer that question, just forget it.”
“No. You were honest with me, so I have to be honest with you...“
I interrupted him.
”Tim, you don't have to do anything. My honesty was also only forced. If it hadn't been for the computer and if it would have been impossible to keep quiet about it anyway, I would certainly not have told you, at least not today.”
“It's okay. You want to know if I'm gay? To be honest, I don't know. I've never thought about it. I mean, I've never been with anyone, neither with a girl nor with a boy. And it's also not that I've missed anything so far. But I can tell you one thing for sure: I don't have any problems with you being gay, really.”
Phew, now I was relieved, the stone that fell from my heart has the dimensions of an ice age glacial erratic. And the impact was certainly recorded by all surrounding seismological stations.
"Thanks, Tim. That really means a lot to me. I really like you, don't worry, as a brother and a friend. I'd find it stupid if that were to now put a strain on our relationship.”
“As I said, it won't. But just to be on the safe side, so I don't say something inappropriate: does anyone else know about it besides me? After all, I don't want your mother to have a heart attack because of something I said.“
”Not her, she was the first to know. But it's nice that you're thinking of me. Well, except for my mother, everyone knows, so there's no danger there.”
“And my father?“
”If he doesn't know from my mother – and I doubt that she told him without asking me first – then he's still in the dark. And I'd prefer it to stay that way for the time being. I'll tell him eventually, but I really want him to hear it from me, at the time I think is right.”
“Okay, my lips are sealed.“
”Thanks.“
”But what I'd really like to know is when and how you realized it yourself. If you don't want to talk about it, that's okay, but I'd really like to know.”
So I started telling Tim my story, with all the ups and downs, the support and the rejections. I even told him about the time when I had seriously considered suicide. That was one thing I had never told anyone before, not even my mother knew about it, because I didn't want to worry her. Why I told all this to Tim – I have no idea. Maybe just because I just had to tell someone, I had buried this time very deep in my memories, and somehow it felt good to let it out. Tim listened very carefully, asked a few questions and tried hard to understand everything.
“You really wanted to kill yourself?“
”Well, probably not really, otherwise I would have done it for sure. But the thought haunted me a few times through the head.“
”Why?”
“I was scared. Scared of no one wanting to have anything to do with me anymore. Scared of losing my mother after my father. Scared of having no friends anymore. I was fourteen or fifteen, and such thoughts can really scare you.“
”Sorry, it was a stupid question.”
“You don't need to apologize. It wasn't that stupid a question. For someone who hasn't experienced it themselves, it's just hard to understand. I didn't think I had anyone I could talk to about it back then. Fortunately, I eventually found the courage to tell my mother, and from then on things went uphill again, with a slight delay. And Tim?”
“Yes?“
”If you ever need someone to talk to, and don't want to go to Reinhardt or even to my mother, then try me. You can talk to me about anything, I will never laugh at you or despise you for anything or whatever. You'll see, if you let someone in on your problems, it will be much easier to solve them.”
“Thank you. Honestly. Nobody has ever made me such an offer.“
”Well, it's there. Whenever you want to take me up on it, it's fine by me. But damn, now we've talked for hours. We have to get going soon, I still have something to do before the party at Katja's.”
“Damn. It's my fault again, I've kept us here for so long with my curiosity.“
”Stop apologizing all the time. It's late but not too late. Besides, I was the one who kept monologizing. But come on, we should finish getting dressed and then go.”
“Agreed. And Danny... thanks for telling me all that. It means a lot to me that you trusted me with it.“
”Hey, no secrets between brothers, okay?“
”Okay."
With that said, we both got up and got fully dressed. I turned off the computer, grabbed two large plastic bags, and headed for the door.
“Come on, Tim, we have to dismantle some of the furniture.“
He looked at me blankly.
”What do you mean?“
”Well, my mother is a total radio freak. She wants to be able to hear her favorite station in every room. But we only have one radio hooked up to cable, and she can't get that station over the antenna. So I rigged up a radio link for her from that one radio, with speakers in all the rooms she is in. And we are now dismantling that radio link minus the speakers and taking it to the party. That way, Katja can entertain the whole house from her system in her room.“
”I see, so that's why you absolutely had to go to this party.”
“Well, I'd like to believe that I was invited solely because of my inimitable charm, but I'm afraid my technical genius also plays a role in it.“
In the meantime, we had arrived on the ground floor.
”So, you hold the bags for me, I'll pack the technology.”
Ten minutes later, everything was stowed away, we put on shoes and jackets and set off on the short walk to the venue of the cultural event.
After a few minutes of suffering from the cold, I pressed the doorbell, and apparently Katja had been standing right behind the door, because it was immediately opened for us.
“Hello Danny, I'm so glad you could come. Thomas told me about your little dilemma.“
”Are you glad to see me or the contents of these bags?“
”Well, how can you doubt me! The answer to that is obvious. Give me the bags! You can pick them up here tomorrow.“
”Your warm welcomes never cease to amaze me. By the way, this is Tim, my future... I mean, my future stepbrother. I just thought I'd bring him with me, I hope you don't mind. Tim, this disheveled figure here is Katja, the unfriendly organizer of tonight's happening. And if she doesn't let us in soon and save us from the cold, we'll go back home.”
“No way, in you come. Danny, you're not allowed to leave until the system is up and running. Your new brother is cute, he's allowed to stay anyway. You just have to
tell me whether I should set him up with a girl or a boy."
Oh oh, she had really put her foot in it this time. Poor Tim turned bright red and pale by turns.
“Just don't listen to what Katja says. Anyone who takes her seriously is asking for trouble. Besides, Katja, your matchmaking attempts never worked on me. What makes you think you can do better with Tim?”
“Quite simply, he's much better looking than you.“
”Okay. You want a party without music – you get a party without music. Tim, how about a cozy movie night at our place?”
“Oh no! Oh, please, please, Danny, you said yourself that I can't be taken seriously! Please stay here and set up the system, I beg you! I'll do anything you ask. Should I organize an escort for you for the evening? Or should I get a few of the guys who are coming tonight to play a round of strip poker with you? Name your wish and it shall be granted.”
“You know what, I won't be that way. I'll save that wish for a more opportune occasion, and I guarantee you I won't forget it. So come on, Tim, take off your jacket and get to work.“
Katja jumped up and down in delight.
”Yay, I knew I could count on you. You are and will remain my favorite homo.”
“Thanks a lot.“
Suddenly she covered her mouth with her hands.
”Oh my God, I'm sorry Danny. I hope Tim already knew, or did I blab again?“
”He already knows, even though it's only been a little over an hour.”
“That's a relief. So, you know where everything is, I have to take care of other things again.“
”Is anyone else here yet?“
”Jürgen is preparing the grill, and Lisa has already stocked the bar with her boyfriend. The first guests will probably show up in about half an hour. Is that enough time for you?“
”Don't worry, it's not your first time.”
Katja disappeared, and I set to work with Tim to equip the loudspeakers in the rooms with radio receivers. When that was done, we went to Katja's room to connect the transmitter to her system. Just as I was about to open the door, the owner of the room came running in.
"Wait, Danny, my system is broken, we have to use my brother's.”
“Does he already know about his luck?"
Katja and her little brother Ralph, just fifteen years old, didn't get along very well – well, I felt a little sorry for the poor lad. Having to live under the same roof with Katja all the time must seem like a completely undeserved permanent punishment to him.
“No, but he's not even at home, he's out with his friends. Just go in and plug everything in. There, I'm gone again.”
I didn't feel entirely comfortable with the thought of simply entering a stranger's room and messing with someone else's property without asking, but somehow I had to make it through. I went with Tim in tow to Ralph's room door and opened it energetically, and then took a big step into the room, which was completely unknown to me. It was pitch-dark, so I reached for the light switch, and shortly afterwards the light from several halogen spotlights blinded my eyes. But not hard enough for me not to have been able to see that Katja had been completely wrong with her statement that her brother was not at home. Ralph was there, lying on his bed – and he was obviously not alone. I could only see him properly, but there were a few blonde hairs that didn't match his brown ones, and I was also pretty sure that he had only had two feet and not four the last time I saw him. He was fully dressed, but the position of his body didn't leave much room for interpretation regarding what was going on. The boy had nerves – party preparations were going on all over the house, and he was enjoying himself with his girlfriend! Yes, yes, youth. He was not enthusiastic about my impetuous intrusion, though.
"Damn it, what's going on? Who's there? Get out!”
Did he want to know who had intruded, or did he want the intruder to leave immediately? As much as I could understand his reaction, my natural curiosity got the better of me, and I decided to answer his questions first.
“It's me, Danny. Your lovely sister told me to connect the radio transmitter to your stereo. She said you're not even in the house.“
Ralph remained in the position I had found him in.
”That was never the fucking deal."
The little commotion had meanwhile also attracted Katja.
“What's going on here? Ralph? I thought you were out with your friends?“
The latter slumped a little.
”Danny, give me two minutes, okay? And keep that stupid cow away from me.“
”Okay.”
I pushed my way back out through the door, pushing Katja and Tim in front of me. When we were all outside, I closed the door and stood in front of it, preventing Ralph's sister from storming back in immediately.
"The little bastard, what's he doing here?”
“Uh, just so you know, the little bastard lives here. This is his room. We're the ones who don't really belong in there.“
”So what do we do now? He'll never let me use his stereo!“
”You only have yourself to blame, you paragon of a big sister."
At that moment, the doorbell rang again.
“I suggest you take care of your guests, I'll try to sort this out. If Ralph sees your face again, he's bound to get stubborn.“
”All right, I'm counting on you. But I want to know afterwards who the floozy was he was messing around with. Our parents have handed over the responsibility to me!”
“Ah, come on, Katja. Your brother is growing up slowly. My God, the two were fully dressed, so not much could have happened. Besides, do I have to remind you what kind of stunts you pulled when you were fifteen? So go on, beat it, I'll take care of everything.”
She gave me a doubtful look, but my last comment seemed to have got through to her. Shaking her head, she made her way to the front door, which was now being banged on. I turned to Tim, who was leaning against the doorpost with a grin on his face.
“Well, I'll say one thing for you, Danny, you're a lot of fun to be with.“
”I promised you you'd have a good time.“
Tim didn't get a chance to answer, because at that moment the door opened and Ralph stuck his head through the crack.
”Danny, would you come in here, please? Alone.”
I looked briefly at Tim, who shrugged, and then I followed Katja's brother into his room. His visitor had curled up under the covers, only a piece of blonde hair sticking out, and a low sob could be heard from the corner. On closer inspection, I noticed that Ralph's eyes also looked a bit red and tear-stained. He sat down on his bed next to the rolled-up bundle and stroked the hidden head reassuringly.
“Danny, thanks for kicking Katja out.”
“That's all right. Ralph, I'm really sorry for barging in like that, but your sister said you weren't home.”
"My plans just changed a bit.”
“You don't have to justify yourself, that would be my job. But come on, it's not that bad. I mean, hey, you're almost old enough, aren't you? So how about you introduce me to your girlfriend and then we'll tackle the technical stuff together?”
Ralph gave me a slightly pained look, then turned to the still sobbing bundle, took it in his arms and slowly pulled it into an upright position, whereby the protective blanket slowly but surely slipped and revealed a tear-stained face. A tear-stained, pretty face. The face of a boy!
“Danny, I'd like you to meet Christoph. Chris, this is Danny, a friend of my sister's. You don't need to be afraid of him, he's okay. He's..."
Ralph stopped mid-sentence.
“Go ahead and say it. It's not like I'm making a secret out of it. I'm gay. And apparently I'm not the only one in this room right now. By the way, is it Christoph with an 'f' or a 'ph'?“
”With a 'ph'.”
“Well, that's great, you're a perfect match. Ralph with 'ph' and Christoph with 'ph'. You couldn't have made it any better than that.“
A slight smile spread across two rather stressed faces. Ralph looked at me questioningly.
”What should we do now?"
I thought for a moment.
“Is there another way out of your room than through the large corridor? A back exit maybe?“
”No. I mean, there is a back exit, but to get to it, we'd still have to go downstairs and past the living room first.“
”Hm. What about the window, any way to get down safely?”
We were on the first floor, but maybe there was something like a flower trellis or something like that.
"Under my window is the entrance to the underground car park, no chance of getting down safely.”
Damn. I was slowly running out of ideas. In the meantime, the doorbell had rung several more times, and more and more guests were arriving. And Katja had surely already told everyone that she had caught her brother “engaged in immoral activities.” Any attempt to smuggle the two lovers out of the house discreetly was doomed to failure.
“Have you ever thought about your coming out? If not, now would be a good time to start.“
”You can't be serious! That would be the end of us!“
”Well, it wasn't the end for me. And practically everyone out there knows about me.“
”Don't worry, my sister will make sure I survive this.”
“Does anyone know about you two?“
”My parents.“
Those were the first words I heard from Ralph's friend.
”That you're gay or that you're dating?“
”Both.“
This answer seemed to surprise Ralph a lot.
”What? You told your parents? Why?”
“I couldn't do it any other way. They've known for a while that I'm into boys, well, and since I've been hanging around with you so much lately, they put two and two together and asked me about it. I wouldn't have told them on my own, but I just couldn't lie to them. Will you forgive me?”
He stared at his friend with wide eyes that simply had to be forgiven for anything. At least that was how I felt, and Ralph was not spared from this impression either.
“Okay, okay. I'll have to get used to that, though. When did that happen?“
”Two weeks ago, after the weekend you spent at my place.“
”Has it been that long? And your parents never said anything, just smiled at me and treated me like always! They even invited me over for more sleepovers!”
“You see, Ralph, it's not that bad. Your parents haven't had any problems with me either. As I see it, you have only two options: either you leave secretly and silently, in which case you will definitely be noticed. Then the gossip will be huge, and all behind your back, without you being able to defend yourselves. Or you can walk out with your heads held high, say nothing at first about the subject, but if someone asks you about it, you tell the truth. Your decision, but I see no other alternatives.“
The two caught sinners looked at each other silently for a moment. Then they nodded, hugged each other again and stood up. Ralph took the lead.
”Okay, let's do it.”
I stopped them on their way to the door.
“Wait a minute, you should do something about your faces first. You're not exactly presentable right now. The bathroom is just across the hall, right?”
“Right.”
“Good, wait a moment.”
I stuck my head out of the room door and motioned for Tim to come here.
“Please go to the corner of the corridor and see if the coast is clear."
Tim looked at me questioningly, but then did as I asked. He took a look around the corner and gave me the thumbs up. I opened the door wide and pushed the two love-struck boys into the corridor.
“Come on, get a move on before someone comes. You'll be back here in five minutes, and then we'll take care of the technical stuff. That'll give you a short reprieve."
Ralph and Christoph disappeared into the bathroom, and I could hear the key being turned in the lock. But they could have thought of that before in Ralph's room!
I wandered over to Tim, who was staring at me with wide-open eyes. I grinned and shrugged.
“Did you know about this beforehand or was it a surprise for you, too?”
"I had no idea. But I think they make a cute couple, don't you?”
“Hm. In any case, they were lucky that you were the one to surprise them.”
We stood on the corner for a while and I explained to Tim how things would proceed, then we heard the key again and the bathroom door opened. The two boys dashed back to Ralph's room, and I followed them, pulling Tim along with me. When we arrived in the room, Ralph and Chris were sitting close together on the bed, but when they saw Tim, they immediately moved apart. I couldn't help grinning.
“Just stay like that, Tim's cool.”
Ralph looked at Tim questioningly.
“Is he your... your boyfriend?”
"My future brother. He knows about me, and now about you too. Right, we should get the technology up and running. That is, if you still want to provide it after all this.”
“Do I have a choice?“
”Yes. Just say no and I'll back off.“
”I believe you. But that wouldn't be such a good idea, either. I can't afford to make all those people down there angry with me. Let's get started.”
There wasn't much to do. The biggest problem was that, as usual, all the necessary jacks and plugs were located in the most inaccessible places. Just as I had plugged in the last connection, there was a knock at the door, it opened and Thomas entered.
“Katja sent me to find out what the situation is regarding the music. And I'd like to see the girl who turned little Casanova's head.“
Thomas looked around the room, but couldn't see any female presence.
”What, did you guys smuggle the girl out already? Good work, Katja will flip when she finds out.”
The four of us looked at each other, the corners of our mouths twitched, then we started laughing out loud. Even the two caught up joined in. Thomas, on the other hand, stood in the room completely baffled and didn't understand what was going on.
“Uh, could someone fill me in?”
"But that would actually be a job for your parents, don't you think?”
Thomas shot me a slightly offended look. Well, I didn't want to let him die a stupid death.
“Thomas, this is Tim next to me. We've already talked about him.”
"Ah yes, nice to meet you. It was a good idea of you to bring him to the party, you've killed two birds with one stone. So, who's that next to Ralph?”
Katja's brother took Chris's hand, summoned all his courage and answered Thomas.
“This is Christoph. He's the one who turned my head.”
Thomas gasped for air like a carp on dry land.
“I... I... I don't believe it. Danny has been looking for his prince charming for years, and these two little snotty-nosed brats are a couple?"
His expression revealed that he found the whole thing funny.
“Congratulations, you two. Ralph, I hope you realize that when this gets out, half the girls in your grade will be severely depressed.”
I had to agree with him; both Ralph and his friend were extremely handsome. If they weren't a bit too young for me, I would probably kick myself now for not trying to get close to Katja's little brother earlier. Thomas brought me back to reality with his next question.
"And how do you want to proceed from here?”
Together we explained to him how we envisioned the matter progressing. Thomas made a serious face and nodded in agreement at the end of our explanations.
“Danny's right, that's the best solution. I don't think you need to be afraid, the people here are all handpicked. We've been making sure for a long time that only people who don't have a problem with Danny show up at our parties. It would be stupid if, in the middle of the best mood, such an intolerant asshole started to mess with one of our best friends.”
Well, that was news to me. And I had sometimes wondered a little why everything had always gone so smoothly. No one had ever looked at me askance at such festivities, and those who had made stupid comments at school had, strangely enough, never shown up. Why that was so became clear to me all of a sudden – and at the same moment I realized that I had even better friends than I had ever dared to hope for.
"Danny, here are a few CDs, you'd better put on the music before angry crowds make their way up here. In the meantime, I'll show Tim around and introduce him to everyone.”
With these words, Thomas pushed a bag full of CDs into my hand, grabbed my bewildered future stepbrother and pulled him out of the room. Okay, if he says so. I reached into the bag and took out the CDs, a colorful mix that went up and down the charts of recent years.
"Ralph, this is your stereo, so you're stocking it too.”
He nodded. While plugging in the cables, I saw that he had a 5-disc changer – once loaded, we would have peace (and music) for a long time. Three minutes later, the first track sounded, and we decided to go into the lion's den. But before we left the room, I had to get something off my chest.
“Listen, guys, I hope I'm not offending you, but... you know about safe sex, right?"
The color that came to their faces would have done credit to a Dutch greenhouse tomato. A bashful nod was their answer.
“Well, that's good. I just wanted to make sure you didn't do anything stupid. Come on, let's go downstairs. And remember, just mingle with the guests as if nothing had happened.“
”Okay. And Danny? Thanks.“
”My pleasure. Let's go!”
Pushing the hesitant couple in front of me, I made my way downstairs, where the festivities were slowly getting underway. Among the guests, I spotted Thomas's oldest sister, who was just the right age for my two charges. I didn't know if they already knew each other, but that would become clear. With gentle pressure, I steered Ralph and Christoph in the desired direction.
“Hello Caren, did you manage to persuade Thomas to bring you along again?“
”Hi Danny, well, you know that he can't refuse me anything. By the way, this is Patrick, my boyfriend. Patrick, this is Danny. He's the one who has the unpleasant task of keeping Thomas out of trouble.”
I had to grin, that was actually true, well, at least there was a grain of truth in it. Thomas sometimes had such strange impulses; for example, he had once managed to insult three bald guys who had pushed him more or less accidentally. Fortunately, I was there to mediate. All I can say is: karate. Fortunately, this had happened on a school trip, otherwise it could have had unpleasant consequences. But back to the current event. A boy with fiery red hair held out his hand to me.
"You certainly have your hands full. At least if you believe what Caren said about her brother.”
“It's not quite that bad. By the way, this is Ralph and Christoph. Ralph is in the unfortunate position of being Katja's brother. Or do you already know each other?“
”I've seen Ralph before, but I don't know Christoph. You don't go to our school, do you?“
”No, I go to the same school as Patrick. We already know each other.”
The two lovers were obviously in good hands, so I could slowly pull away.
"Well, have fun, I'll take a walk around the house.”
I moved away, trying to locate Tim in the crowd that was getting denser. Ah yes, there he was, at the other end of the living room, where Thomas was just introducing him to a group of our friends. Tim seemed to be quite comfortable, and I decided to leave him in Thomas' care for a little longer. I began to feel my stomach growl, so I made my way to the feeding trough. Halfway there, however, I was intercepted by our hostess and her friend. I greeted Karsten and tried to make a quick getaway, but I had reckoned without Katja.
"Stay here! Where do you think you're going in such a hurry?”
“To the kitchen, if you don't mind. The forced labor you've sentenced me to has made me quite hungry. So if you'll excuse me...“
”No way! You still owe me a few answers. So, who was the chick that was hitting on my little brother?”
“You'd better ask him yourself. By the way, who have you told already?“
”Just Thomas and Karsten. And Jürgen. And Lisa.“
”No one else?“
”No! But why do you want to know?”
Hm, that sounded better than I had feared. If I hurried, I would be able to get rid of all of them in time – before there was a big bang.
“Katja, I'm being completely serious about what I'm about to say. I want it to stay with just those few people, understood?”
"Well, since when did you take such an interest in my brother?”
“Did you hear me?“
Katja must have seen that this matter was really important to me and that I was deadly serious.
”Yes, yes, all right, I understand. I promise.“
”Good. Karsten?“
”I'm staying out of this completely. I don't care what the little heartbreaker has done, I'm not telling anyone anything.”
“Very well. I have to go on.“
For the moment, my protesting stomach was forgotten, and I went in search of the co-conspirators mentioned by Katja. During a little round, I spotted Lisa, who was distributing drinks with her friend Mike. I pushed my way to them.
”Hello Lisa, Mike.“
”Danny, hello, what can we offer you?”
“Nothing for the moment, thanks. Mike, can I borrow your girlfriend for a moment?“
”Go ahead, I'll be fine on my own. It's not like I have to worry about you.“
”Don't be so sure, maybe I've just discovered my bisexual side."
I pulled a bewildered Lisa into a slightly quieter corner.
“I heard Katja tell you that we caught her brother at, well, at a kind of tryst.“
”Yes, she did, and I think she should have kept it to herself. I certainly didn't want to know, and I hope you don't plan on spreading it around either.”
It's nice when you turn out to have judged someone right.
"Don't worry, I was just about to persuade you not to tell anyone. That doesn't seem necessary now.”
“You can count on that. The poor boy is punished enough with Katja as a sister. But on a different note: Thomas was with us earlier and introduced us to your future brother. God, he's so cute! And so shy. Knowing you, you fell for him immediately."
Great, now it was my turn to blush.
“Am I that easy to see through?“
”Only for us who know and love you. Besides, I can understand it with Tim, heck, I might even go weak with him. If you ever tell Mike, I'll firmly claim never to have said it!”
“Too late, I've got it all on tape for later blackmail attempts. Well, I have to go and do some damage control. Save me something nice, something nice to drink, I mean.”
I left Lisa to her own devices and took another look around at the crowd. There must have been fifty or more people there by now, and I decided not to volunteer to clean up after the party this time. Just as I was on my way to the kitchen to find Jürgen, someone tugged at my arm from behind. I turned around to see Thomas and Tim standing in front of me. The former spoke to me.
“So, there you have your brother again. I showed him around a bit, but now I want to start looking for a girlfriend for the evening. So if you'll excuse me..."
And he wanted to slip away, but I stopped him briefly.
“Thomas, you can go in a minute, but just one thing first. Katja has only told you, Karsten, Lisa and Jürgen about what happened earlier. I'm in the process of sealing everyone's lips, so please shut up too, okay?“
”All right, I'll keep quiet like a grave.“
”Good, buzz off.”
He was gone, and I was left alone with Tim. He seemed quite pleased.
"Well, little brother, how do you like it? Do you regret coming with me?”
“No, I don't. The people are nice, the music is good, and somehow I'm slowly realizing what I've been missing for the last two or three years."
Well, that was quite a different impression from the pile of self-doubt I met earlier in the day.
“Very well. Listen, I have to shut up one more person, and it just so happens that this person works in the kitchen and I urgently need something to eat anyway. Are you coming with me or do you want to keep mingling?“
”I'll come with you. First of all, I'm hungry too, and secondly, I don't want to walk around all alone. Of course, only if I'm not a burden to you.”
“Don't worry, you won't. Come on, this way."
There was no missing the way to the kitchen; the aroma of steaks and sausages practically dragged me in the right direction. When we arrived, we saw Jürgen loading a large electric grill with lots of good things. Unfortunately, there were also a handful of other guests in the kitchen, and I had to get rid of them first.
“Good evening, everyone. Hygiene inspection. If everyone except the cook would please leave the kitchen. Hurry, hurry!“
The unwanted listeners grumbled quietly and left – I really couldn't take such trifles into consideration.
Jürgen grinned at me expectantly.
”Greetings, keeper of the meat pot!”
“Greetings to you, too, O master of good manners!“
We had once appeared together as Roman senators in a school play – a thing we always enjoyed reminiscing about.
”So, Mr. Hygiene Inspector, what can I do for you? And who is that next to you?“
”That's Tim, my brother.”
“Nice to meet you. But why did you send everyone out, surely not just to introduce me to Tim and reminisce?“
”You got me pegged. Listen, Katja told you something about Ralph earlier...”
“Don't even remind me of that! That old chatterbox never knows when it's better to shut up. If we were to tell everyone everything we've experienced with her, we could write entire TV series about it.“
”So can I assume that you have not spoken to anyone about this and will not speak to anyone about it?”
“Absolutely. What Ralph does is his business, and Katja is the last person who should play the moralizer here.“
”Very good. Now that the business matters have been clarified: what nice things can you offer us to eat?”
Jürgen had once again cleared out his parents' butcher shop. (By the way, you could clearly see his parents' profession in Jürgen, but he was a sweetheart and always overlooked the occasional teasing about his body shape with boundless generosity. As a friend, he was one of those rare specimens you could rely on one hundred and ten percent.) Three minutes later, Tim and I were sitting at the kitchen table, tucking into two plates full of meat and sausage.
“Inspector, may I let the other customers in now?”
"Be it allowed.”
The rest of the party went as usual: lots of music, dancing, more or less meaningful conversations, good food, more or less substantial drinks. With the exception of two glasses of beer, I stuck to non-alcoholic drinks, and Tim also lived very solidly in this regard. My intention to look for handsome boys had been pushed into the background by the events of the evening, and I didn't really feel like it anymore anyway. The party had degenerated into hard work.
At some point in the middle of the festivities, Katja pulled me into a small storage room. I had a vague feeling of knowing exactly what was going to happen now.
“Danny, damn it, you should have told me!“
”What?“
”About Ralph and his... his friend! How am I going to look now!“
”What do you mean, how are you going to look now? Is it so bad that your brother likes boys? Surprise: me too! That hasn't bothered you before.”
“I'm not bothered by the fact that Ralph is gay either. Well, not particularly. But Christoph was supposed to spend the night at his place, and now I have to see how I can fix it. You don't happen to have his parents' phone number?“
”Man, Katja, I just met him too! And what do you need the number for anyway?”
“Well, I have to call them to come and get him! There's no way he can spend the night here!“
”Nonsense. When you were fifteen, friends of yours would spend the night, with the knowledge and approval of your parents.“
”But that was different!“
”Was it? Well, I can't see any difference. It's even perfectly legal.”
“And what about our parents? How am I supposed to explain that to them?“
”You don't have to explain anything to them, if at all, that's something Ralph has to do. As long as you don't blabber, your brother just has a friend over, and that's really not the first time. When the two of them are ready, they'll talk to your parents on their own.”
“And I'm supposed to just grin and bear it?“
”First of all, I don't see any bad game, and secondly, how often did Ralph have to watch your conquests suddenly sitting at the breakfast table?”
“Fine, fine! Whatever you say! But I disclaim any responsibility. If something comes out of this and my parents cause trouble, I'll tell them it's all your fault! Now I have to take care of my guests again!"
Wow, she was really steamed. Anyway, I wasn't going to let her lousy mood ruin my evening.
Around midnight, everyone started to leave, and half an hour later only the volunteers of the clean-up crew were left. Although Katja and Ralph's parents generously allowed such parties from time to time, they demanded that when they arrived – which would be around two o'clock – there should be peace and quiet and the worst of the mess should have been cleared up. Lisa, Mike and Jürgen took care of the kitchen and dishes, Thomas, who had spent the second half of the evening with a girl from our parallel class, struggled with the vacuum cleaner, and some others moved furniture. Tim and I dismantled the radio receivers, but Ralph and Christoph were nowhere to be seen.
The first bag was full, only the transmitter from Ralph's room was missing. I went upstairs, and mindful of the afternoon's experiences, I knocked softly on the door this time. No answer. I knocked a little louder – again without result. So I pushed down the door handle, half expecting it to be locked, but no, the door opened. The two missing boys were lying on the bed, peacefully slumbering and snuggled up to each other in full gear. A cute sight. I decided to do without dismantling the transmitter, which would have made too much noise and certainly woken them up. Instead, I just switched off the hi-fi system and then looked again at the two boys, amused. Although I didn't want to disturb them, I decided to at least carefully take off their shoes. When that was done, I took the blanket lying on the floor and spread it over them both. Finally, I stroked Ralph and Chris's hair briefly, whispered “Sleep well” and then crept out of the room. Tim was waiting for me at the door. I grinned, put my index finger to my lips and quietly closed the door behind me.
“Well, I think we should start heading home soon. I'll get the transmitter back tomorrow.“
Tim looked at me penetratingly, his head cocked slightly to the side.
”Danny?“
”Yes?“
”I think you're the best big brother I could ever wish for."
If this were a real love story, I would be moved to tears. Ahem, to be honest, I was really on the verge of doing so. But I just managed to swallow it all down and point Tim towards the stairs with a generous gesture. Downstairs, we said goodbye to those still present, I impressed on Katja to leave the boys in peace upstairs, then we got dressed and wandered through the dark, freezing night towards home.
We were both very happy when we reached the entrance of the well-heated house! Who ordered this freezing cold? Ten minutes past one, I locked the front door from the inside, and we peeled off our jackets, scarves, gloves, etc. Tim stared at the bag of technology.
“Do we have to set this up again now?“
”Nah, the transmitter's still missing anyway, and who knows when my mom will show up here again.“
”Thank God.“
”I assume you want to go to bed right away?”
“To be honest, I'd rather quickly jump back into the shower. My clothes and my hair smell of cigarette smoke, and I've sweated quite a bit too."
Tim had danced a few times with different girls, and indeed an awful lot had been smoked, as I could tell from a quick sniff test on my fleece shirt.
“Right. That's a really good idea. This time you can start, not that you have to wait for me forever again.“
We walked up the stairs, Tim disappeared into the bathroom, and after a short time I heard the water rushing. I went to my closet and picked out a pair of really warm pajamas. At that same moment, the phone rang.
”Thom.”
“Hello Danny, it's me, Mom.“
As if I didn't recognize her voice.
”Hello Mom. Well, how was your evening without us pests?“
”I almost said 'boring,' but of course that's not true. We really had a few nice hours. I hope you did too? Did everything go well?”
“Of course. Tim seems to have enjoyed it too, and he made a few new friends.“
”Reinhardt will be relieved to hear that. Wait, he's standing right next to me. He would like to talk to Tim, can you hand him the phone?“
”I'm sorry, he's just in the shower. Can I take a message?”
“Oh no, that's not necessary. He probably just wanted to hear from him himself how he was doing.“
”Tell him not to worry. So, what time should we expect you tomorrow? Do you have any special plans?”
“Knowing you, you probably want to sleep in, and Reinhardt says that Tim isn't averse to a sleepy morning either, so we thought we'd pick you up around half past eleven and go somewhere for lunch together. Agreed?”
“Sure.“
Just at that moment, the bathroom door opened and Tim came into the room wearing only a towel.
”Mom, hold on. Is Reinhardt still around?“
”Yes, why?“
”Tim just got out of the bath, I'll give him the phone.”
I handed the phone to Tim, grabbed my pajamas and retreated to the bathroom so I couldn't hear what Tim was discussing with his father. When I left the bathroom ten minutes later, ready for bed, Tim was already in bed.
"So, everything okay with your old man?”
“Yes, everything's fine. He thanked me for the nice evening. Rather for being allowed to spend it alone with Maria.“
”Maybe we should get separate apartments, us two here, the two of them at your place.“
”Oh no. It's nice to be alone for a while, but in the long run I'd probably miss Dad.”
“I feel the same way about Mom. Did he explain the plans for tomorrow...“ I looked at the clock, ‘I meant for today?’
”He did. So we can sleep a little longer.“
”You can, but I still have to do something first.“
”What?”
“I still have to pick up the transmitter from Katja. I'll arrange to be at her place around half past ten, at eleven. That way I'll have enough time to dismantle everything and still be back here in time.“
”Do you mind if I come with you?”
“Not at all. But then we have to get up at half past nine to have a quick breakfast beforehand.“
”No problem. Will you set an alarm?“
”I'm just doing that."
When that was done, I reached for the light switch, turned off the lights and then carefully walked to my bed. On the way there, I stopped at the window.
“Do you mind if I tilt the window slightly? I sleep better with fresh air. If it gets too cold, we can always close it again.“
”No problem, I can't sleep with the window closed either. I always find it terrible when I can't open it during a storm or heavy rain.”
There he was, completely on my wavelength. When I arrived at my bed, I settled down comfortably, stretched out and snuggled into the warm duvet.
“Good night, Tim.”
"Good night, Danny. And thanks for convincing me to come along.”
“My pleasure. So sleep well and fast.“
”I hate you!"
Help! What an awful sound! After a brief period of disorientation, which was not surprising for someone who had just been woken from the deepest sleep, I turned off my radio alarm clock as the source of all evil. If I had any say in the matter, the radio editor who had dug up this old Tic-Tac-Toe piece would lose his job right now.
With a well-aimed blow, I silenced the source of the noise. A glance at the other bed showed that Tim had reacted similarly to me and was sitting upright in bed with sleepy eyes.
“Did you have to do that, Danny?“
”Sorry. Next time I'll plug in headphones and sleep with them.“
”Hey, I didn't mean it like that!“
”I know you didn't. What do you say, you want the bathroom first?“
”You just want me to be the first to get out of bed and close the window!”
“Exactly! Besides, you can turn on the heat while you're at it. After all, what does one have a little brother for?“
Tim resigned himself to his fate, pushed his blanket off, sat on the edge of the bed and slipped into his slippers.
”Argh! They're freezing!“
”Now you know why I sleep with socks.”
“Thanks for letting me know in time.“
”No problem."
He put on his socks, got up, closed the window, turned up the heat, grabbed his clothes and went into the bathroom – pleased to find that it was already comfortably heated. I, for my part, lay back down and let the events of the last day pass in review again. It had certainly been one of the most interesting days of my life so far. Most important of course was Tim, even though I was in quite a dilemma in this regard. On the one hand, I enjoyed my role as a big brother and assumed (probably not wrongly) that we would both become close friends very quickly – if we weren't already. On the other hand, there was of course also my other side, the one that longed for even more and different attention. My grandma had always said “There's a lid to fit every pot,” but no matter how hard I had looked so far, I hadn't come across mine yet. And now fate suddenly threw someone at my feet who could have sprung straight from my imaginary dream boy catalog – and it's my future little brother, of all people! The difficult-to-interpret signals from Tim in this regard didn't help me sort out my feelings either.
Then, of course, there was the discovery of Ralph and Christoph. It had always been clear to me that, from a purely statistical point of view, there had to be other boys in my environment who felt the same way I did, but I never thought that they would be so close and that I would be able to discover them personally. The stupid thing is that the more I thought about the two of them, the more jealous I became of their shared happiness. Damn, wouldn't I have been there first? After all, with my two-year age gap, I had the “older rights.”
Tim's reappearance in the room startled me out of my musings. He stood there in his blue thermal underwear and held the clothes he had worn to the party far away from him.
"This stuff still smells like smoke.”
“Throw the stuff in the laundry box in the bathroom, my mom will wash them.“
”Do you think so? I can also take them home with me.“
”Then your bag will also stink afterwards.“
”Right. Thanks.“
Tim threw the aforementioned things to my dirty laundry.
”That's it, the bathroom is all yours.”
The time had come. There were no more excuses now, I had to leave my nice, warm bed. Fortunately, the room was now reasonably warm. So I dangled my feet over the edge of the bed, got up and marched into the bathroom with more momentum than I would have dared after last night. After a quarter of an hour, I had finished everything, got partially dressed and went back to the room, where Tim was still sitting on his bed in the same clothes as before, browsing through one of my books.
"I thought I wouldn't get fully dressed yet, we surely want to have breakfast first before we have to leave, right?”
“Right thought. I practically always walk around the house like this in winter. It's more practical than constantly changing clothes. So let's see what we can fill our stomachs with.”
When we arrived in the kitchen, we decided on baked baguettes. While I started the oven and loaded it, I verbally maneuvered Tim through the depths of our kitchen cabinets so that he could set the table. Then I went to the refrigerator and inspected the jam supplies.
“Tim, what would you like? Strawberry jam, plum jam or Nutella?“
”Nutella.“
”A chocolate child. Sweet.“
”There must be another one of those here, otherwise you wouldn't have the stuff around, would you?"
Oops, I gave myself away. Quickly switch to a different topic.
“What do you want to drink? Coffee, tea, cocoa?“
”Cocoa, if it's not too much work. I can't stand coffee.“
Another thing we have in common. Normally I would have tea, but I decided not to make a big deal about it and just go with Tim's choice.
”So cocoa. No problem.”
A few minutes later we were sitting across from each other, chewing, and I soon realized that one of my mother's worst fears would come true. She would get another eater of my caliber in the house. I ate a lot, but Tim practically inhaled his breakfast. I was starting to worry that I had miscalculated the amount I had prepared.
“Uh, Tim, do you want me to throw some baguettes in the oven for you?"
He paused briefly in his chewing, took a quick glance at the available supplies, and then shook his head. Phew, that was a close call. I made a mental note to ask him beforehand how much he intended to eat in the future.
I leaned back comfortably and watched Tim as he followed the baguettes with a large glass of hot cocoa in one go. When he put it down and looked at me full and satisfied, the corners of my mouth twitched involuntarily upwards.
"What is it?”
“There's a mirror over there. See for yourself.“
Tim got up, went to the mirror, looked in and then licked the cocoa off his upper lip.
”Exactly these drops I had already missed.”
Well, that's it, now I had to snort out loud. Laughing, we then removed the traces of our breakfast, then went back upstairs and got dressed. The thermometer showed 6 degrees below zero, and thick snow clouds were hanging in the sky. Tim quickly packed his bag so that he only had to grab it later, then we set off for Katja's. The way there was uneventful, except for the fact that Tim slipped on a snow-covered, icy puddle, clung to me in his search for support, and in doing so caused us both to fall. Cursing and shifting our bones back into the right places, we got up, knocking a lot of snow off our clothes.
“Listen, I thought you gave up jumping in puddles?“
”Sorry, it's just in my blood. But at least the water was in a solid state, so it shouldn't have scared you too much. No danger of drowning in it. That's progress, isn't it?”
Oh yes. By the way, is a big brother allowed to take his cheeky little brother over his knee? On the other hand, I was glad that he had abandoned some of his reserve and shyness.
With our senses heightened, we managed to cover the rest of the way without further incidents or mishaps. I rang the doorbell, and shortly afterwards a tall, blonde woman opened the door for us.
"Danny, how nice, we were hoping to see you today. And this must be your brother, we've heard about him too.”
“Good morning, Mrs. Maurer. That's right, this is Tim. We're here to pick up the rest of my equipment. I didn't get around to it last night.“
”No problem. Come in.“
We entered the house and took off our shoes.
”Are you in a hurry, or do you have a few minutes? We'd like to discuss something with you.”
I looked at my watch. We were well on schedule.
“No problem. If it doesn't take too long.”
“Definitely not. Come with me to the living room.”
We followed her into the room, where her husband was already sitting. After a general greeting, they escorted us to two chairs. There was a brief silence between us, then Mrs. Maurer spoke again.
“Danny, do you have any idea what we found tonight when we took a quick look into Ralph's room to see if everything was okay?"
Oh dear, I actually had a pretty good idea. The Maurers immediately recognized the look of shock on my face, and theirs changed to a smile.
“So you know what I'm talking about. Listen, we only invited you in here to thank you. The boys told us earlier what you did for them, and Katja also reported, a little indignant, how you took responsibility for her.“
”So they have no problem with it?”
“But of course not!” The laughter lines on Mr. Maurer's face came into action. ”We've had a hunch for a few days. We drove past the movie theater, and now guess who was standing there holding hands in line at the box office. Very conspicuously inconspicuous, of course. However, we wanted to give them the time and the opportunity to decide for themselves when they wanted to tell us something.”
“So you didn't mention last night's somewhat unusual sleeping arrangements to them today either?“
”No, we really didn't. After we saw the two of them clinging to each other, we immediately decided not to say a word about it. Well, and today at breakfast they came out with it on their own.”
I was relieved. It seemed as if everything concerning Ralph and Christoph was on its way to a happy ending.
"By the way, they couldn't remember taking off their shoes or covering up. Do you have any idea who intervened?”
I smiled at Ralph's parents, but at the same time I wondered how such a brat as Katja could have grown up in their care.
“When I went to get the transmitter, I found more or less the same scene as you did tonight. It looked so peaceful that I didn't have the heart to disturb them, so I just did what I was sure wouldn't wake them, and then I quietly left.”
“That was really nice of you, we think you helped the boys a lot. We're so glad you stumbled across them and not Katja. She can be a little... well, she's not particularly sensitive.”
Not particularly sensitive! This description easily qualified for the Understatement of the Century Award. Just using her name and the word “sensitive” in the same sentence grossly violated the rules of the new spelling.
“So, as I said, we wanted to thank you. Uh, I hope I'm not offending you, but I'd really like to know if... well, if you've found a boyfriend yet. He would be very lucky.“
”Well, I'm still single. You don't happen to have another son around Katja's age who looks like Ralph and has his personality?”
The two laughed, and Mrs. Maurer shook her head regretfully.
“We're really sorry, we don't. Otherwise, you would be very welcome as a son-in-law.”
“Too bad. But there's nothing we can do about it.” I looked at my watch. “Now Tim and I should slowly take care of the technology, our parents will pick us up at half past twelve for lunch together.”
“Oh, go ahead, we don't want to keep you unnecessarily. But... uh... maybe you'd better knock when you're upstairs."
I had learned that lesson. We rose, and shortly thereafter we stood in front of the famous room door. I knocked, and we were immediately invited to enter. Ralph and Christoph were sitting on the bed holding the controllers of a Playstation in their hands. They had interrupted the game when I knocked, and now they looked at us with wide eyes and blushed a little again. Then a mischievous smile broke out on their faces.
“Well you two, sleep well?”
I just couldn't resist that now.
"Yes.”
Oh, they even answered in stereo! Ah, love must be beautiful!
“Danny, we have to... ‘
’Stop! Not another word! My capacity for thanks has been pretty much exhausted.”
“Who told you that we wanted to thank you?”
That was Chris, this time all alone. And Ralph felt compelled to continue.
“We actually wanted to complain that you just turned off the music last night. Turning it down would have been enough.”
“And thanks is the world's reward. Won't happen again. So, while I'm shutting down the station, you can show Tim your toy.” Whether he was interested in it, I didn't know, but suddenly I didn't have the strength to continue talking to this contented, happy couple. It reminded me too much of what I lacked myself.
Five minutes later, everything was safely stowed in the bag we had brought with us, we said goodbye to the two young lovers, walked downstairs, checked out of Ralph's parents' house and were back at my place shortly after. We used the next quarter of an hour to put the technology back where it belonged, and no sooner had we finished than the horn was already honking outside the front door. We put on shoes and jackets, left and locked the house and got into Tim's father's waiting Chrysler.
The reunion between Reinhardt and his son was tremendous, that between my mother and me... well, it was definitely there. The two “old guys” immediately grilled us about the previous evening (as true gentlemen, we of course left out the topic of Ralph and Christoph) and were very pleased to learn that we had actually “clobbered” each other well. You could almost hear a relay clicking in their brains, triggering the action “switch to next family reunion stage”. As soon as we arrived at the restaurant (an Italian restaurant again, for some reason the Bergners seemed to like it – not that I was complaining), my mother started to lay out her plans for the further integration of the families in front of Tim and me.
“Boys, we were thinking that it would be quite nice if we all went somewhere together over Christmas and New Year. As a real family.“
Tim jumped at the idea.
”Great. To the Alps, to go skiing!”
I slumped in my chair and made a pained face. Actually, it was cold enough for me here. And I really didn't like those treacherous, slippery wooden boards. I could already see myself in the hospital with broken legs for the holidays. Reinhardt seemed to have noticed my skepticism.
“We'll see. We'll think of something that we'll all like. I already have an idea.” His words were accompanied by a mysterious smile.
That ended the discussion, and dinner was soon on the table. For the first time, my mother had the pleasure of watching Tim eat a normal meal that was not dictated by competitions. While Tim was devouring a pizza the size of a cartwheel, my mother's face grew longer and longer. She cast a doubting glance first at Tim's plate, then at her usual salad bowl, and then shook her head in resignation.
“Tell me, Reinhardt, how come the boys can eat as much as they want without it showing on them! I count every single calorie and still don't lose weight. Tim, where do you eat it all?"
She had asked me this question often enough, and now she got an answer from my little brother that she had also heard from me.
“No idea. Hollow legs?"
If he had any, they were now being filled at a tremendous speed, and before my mother had even finished half of her salad, Tim's plate was empty. Mine too, by the way. All in all, there were four rather satisfied people sitting at the table.
During the meal, we talked about what we could do with the day, but unfortunately my severe headache put paid to the plans (which ranged from Christmas market to sauna). It had hit me out of the blue, and I hadn't even had a sip of the glass of wine that our old friends Tim and I had bought to celebrate the day. My mother was the first to notice my pain-distorted face.
“Danny, what's the matter, you suddenly look so pale.”
"Nothing serious, I just have a killer headache all of a sudden.”
My mother immediately switched to her “poor-me-mode,” and ten minutes later we were on our way home. By the time we got there, I felt as if a hundred dwarfs were playing bowling in my skull. And the brothers always hit the bull's-eye! I was really surprised, because I couldn't explain it. I definitely didn't have a hangover, and headaches were actually quite unheard of. Anyway, my mother immediately put me to bed at home, gave me two painkillers and then wanted to send Reinhardt and Tim away.
"I'm sorry, but as you can see, I have to take care of Danny.”
I really couldn't let that happen. It was enough that I was out of action, the other three didn't need to suffer because of me. I managed to convince my mother that her presence was not necessary and that I could suffer just fine alone. After she had asked half a dozen times whether she could really leave me alone, Reinhardt pulled her out of my room by the arm. All three wished me a speedy recovery and then set off for the Christmas market. I lay back in bed and tried to find a position for my head in which the pain was somewhat bearable.
Apparently the pills had actually worked, because at some point I had fallen asleep, and when I woke up, it was already dark outside the window. The headache was gone and had given way to a dull feeling, which, although not pleasant, was much easier to bear. I carefully sat up, and when I didn't feel any negative reactions from my body, I decided to see if I still had the house to myself.
Of course I hadn't. It was almost seven, and my mother had been back for a while, pottering around in the kitchen – extra quietly so as not to disturb me. I went to the kitchen table and sat down on a chair with a sigh.
“Danny, there you are. How are you, is the pain gone?”
"I'm okay again. At least it doesn't hurt anymore.”
“Do you have any idea what got you? Did you maybe drink too much yesterday?“
”Mom, I just had two beers! If it had been too much, it would have hit me right away and not waited until we were comfortably sitting at lunch. So, on to another topic, how was your afternoon?”
“Really nice. We wandered from stall to stall for three hours, taking it easy. We tried everything: waffles, roasted almonds, candied apples, cotton candy, mulled wine, etc. Just thinking about it makes me dread stepping on the scales tomorrow morning.“
”And did you at least get me something?”
My mother smiled at me and took a large paper bag out of the kitchen cupboard.
“Here, I know exactly what you're after.”
I was found out. A Maxi bag of roasted almonds, my teeth were already grinding in barely restrained anticipation.
“Agreed?”
"Absolutely. Thank you.”
“Oh, that reminds me: Reinhardt also sent you something."
She disappeared for a moment and then reappeared with something huge and fluffy in her hands. It took me a while to figure out what it was, then it dawned on me. A giant stuffed dog stared at me with button eyes the size of five-mark pieces.
“My God, where did you get that from?”
“Reinhardt drew 'free choice' twice at a lottery booth, and so he asked me what would make you happy. Since you like dogs, I suggested this little animal to him. Tim got a bear that was at least as big. You should have seen the two of them dragging the creatures across the market to the car, because they get pretty heavy over time!”
I could well imagine that. According to the unofficial teenage codex, I was way too old for stuffed animals, but I still appreciated the gesture. Besides, my room was big enough – though I couldn't quite imagine where Tim was going to put his bear in his small room. I decided to thank his father profusely at the next opportunity.
“So, my boy, what about it? Do you feel like some supper?”
I listened to myself. I didn't really have an opinion on the subject. But before I woke up in the middle of the night with a growling stomach, I let myself be talked into a few slices of toast. Afterwards, I said goodbye for the night and went to bed at a time on this Sunday that I would have heroically protested against even at the tender age of ten in my normal state. The huge plush dog found its place on the bed of Thomas/Tim.
Monday. I hate Mondays. At least those that are not distinguished by falling on a holiday or during the holidays. I went with the Boomtown Rats: “I wanna shoot the whole day down.” But it didn't help, there were still a few days to go before the Christmas holidays.
The pain dwarfs in my head had left me in peace, but I had a slight feeling that my head was wrapped in cotton wool. I was awake, but I wasn't really present. Instinctively, I worked through the morning checklist, ate a breakfast that normally wouldn't have been enough to fill even one of my cavities, and then, to my mother's concerned looks, I made my way to the building that euphemistically bore the name “high school” – instead of being more truthfully known as “dungeon”.
As usual, I met up with Thomas and a few others, most of whom had also been at the party and didn't show any of the symptoms I was suffering from – so food poisoning could probably be ruled out. It quickly became apparent that I was not a good companion that day, and some were also seriously concerned about my unnatural pallor. But what the heck, I just had to get through it.
The first two hours were reasonably bearable; they passed by without me really noticing much of them – actually a blessing. Later, my headache from the day before returned, and towards the end of the third hour I was so nauseous that I was only able to prevent a major disaster by sprinting to the toilet. I – excuse me – puked my guts out and was about to collapse in the cubicle. Fortunately, Thomas had followed me unnoticed and now intervened to help and held me upright.
“Man, Danny, what are you doing!"
I would have liked to know that too. After I had recovered a little, I managed with Thomas' help to make my way back to class, where the break had now started. The next lesson was history, and luckily our teacher (unfortunately already of an older vintage) was already present. He looked at Thomas and me, had a brief explanation of what had happened, and then marched straight to the secretary's office, instructing Thomas to take me there very slowly.
I didn't really notice what happened next, they had probably called my mother, and I only came to in our family doctor's office. There I had to endure the usual procedures, among other things the good doctor found out that I had a fever of almost forty. In my head the skittles were rattling again, and I felt generally about as bad as what I had spat out in the toilet before.
My mother had, of course, insisted on being present during the examination and was now really quite worried. I had already indicated at the very beginning that I had already cheated the Grim Reaper once, and since then we had lived in constant fear that the blood cancer could return. My current symptoms were not particularly reassuring. In view of my medical history, the doctor naturally took a great deal of time. She tapped here, listened there, poked there. At the end, she smiled encouragingly at us.
“Young man, I don't think you have much to worry about. I'll have another blood test done, but in my opinion you've caught the flu that's going around where I live at the moment. Did you not get vaccinated?”
Me? I should voluntarily expose myself to a needle? Never! I shook my head violently – and immediately regretted it bitterly. The pain dwarfs stopped bowling and started several huge church bells.
“Which message do you want to hear first, the good or the bad?”
"The bad one.”
“You'll feel really dirty for a few days.“
Great, I couldn't think of anything better.
”And what's the good news?”
“You won't have to go back to school this year."
Well, that was something, at least. The doctor took some blood samples, wrote out a few prescriptions, and then I went home, making a quick stop at the pharmacy. When I arrived home, I went straight to my bed.
Mom soon appeared with various medications. I would seriously like to know who decided that effective medications have to taste awful! But that wasn't the worst yet; that was yet to come. The brave pill-pusher had actually prescribed suppositories for my headache! Eek! The thought of someone fumbling around in my backside was not a pleasant one, at least not if it was your own mother. But I heroically endured that too, then my mother left the room, leaving the door ajar, and after the headache subsided a bit, I dozed off into a fitful sleep.
When I woke up again, my bedclothes were soaked through with sweat, and my watch insisted that it was already shortly after three o'clock in the afternoon. The headache had become a tolerably bearable dull throb, but my throat felt like it had dried up, so I gathered all my strength and called for my mother. I had my doubts as to whether my hoarse croak had reached her, but shortly afterwards she stormed up the stairs and into my room.
“How are you, Danny? Are you all right?”
"I'm getting better. I need something to drink.”
“I'll get you some tea in a minute, you need to take your medicine again anyway. Let me see your forehead. Hm. Not quite as hot anymore, but we'll measure it right away. My God, you're soaking wet! And so are your bedclothes. Look, I'll give you a fresh pair of pajamas to put on, and then you can lie down in the other bed.”
So it was done, and five minutes later I felt a little more comfortable in dry surroundings. With a death-defying courage I swallowed the disgusting medicine, and the tea that was served with it had a very pleasant effect on my throat. Then my mother came in with the clinical thermometer, and I resigned myself to my fate. She didn't think much of taking the temperature in the armpit but insisted on the more traditional method. I think I don't have to go into that here. Anyway, I had just endured the invasion of my posterior realm and was patiently waiting for the result when the doorbell rang.
“Stay there, I'll see who it is.”
As if I were in a position to run away.
A moment later she was back in the room, but she was anything but alone. Reinhardt and Tim pushed through the door behind her and stared in my direction. It took me a moment to realize why they were staring so hard, then I quickly pulled the blanket over my exposed backside with the thermometer sticking out of it. Thanks a lot, Mutsch. She really had a rare talent for putting me in the most embarrassing situations. At that moment, she apparently realized what she had done again.
“Oh God, I'm sorry, Danny, I hadn't even thought about that anymore.”
Reinhardt smiled at me briefly and then grabbed his son.
“Come on, Tim, we'll wait outside for a moment. Let us know when we can come back in."
The two of them left the room, my mother quickly finished what she had so carelessly forgotten, and apologized to me again in a whisper. Well, I had never been able to stay mad at her for long, and this was no exception.
“It's all right. So, how about it, can you fry eggs on me yet?“
”Not anymore. 38.9 – that sounds a little better. Now, get dressed and cover yourself up so I can let your visitors in.”
I had hardly done that when she brought Tim and his father back into the room. How did they actually know about my condition, or had they just come by? I didn't need to ask them this question, because Reinhardt answered it immediately and voluntarily.
“Hello Danny, I'm sorry to show up like this, but when Maria called me and told me what was going on, we thought you might like a little company. Now tell me, what have you been doing?”
I had already heard the last sentence today. From Thomas, if I remembered correctly. Somehow this question from a healthy person to an ill one seemed to be anchored in the human genome. Cut your finger – “What are you doing?” Break your leg – “What are you doing?” Catch the flu – “What are you doing?” Get the neighbor's daughter pregnant – “What are you doing?” Well, at least I would never have to worry about the latter situation. That's how everything in life has its good side.
My mother kindly took on the task of telling the two what had happened since our breakup yesterday afternoon. I was able to spare my voice and enjoyed a little of the concerned attention that the other three showed me. When my mother was finished, I received more sympathetic looks. Reinhardt shook his head sadly.
“I'm really sorry, Danny, and I hope you'll feel better soon. Fortunately, there's still a little time until Christmas, otherwise I would have to...”
He stopped mid-sentence. I really don't like it when you arouse curiosity and then leave us hanging. The other two felt the same way, and my mother fell into her role as the boss interrogator. A role, by the way, that she had perfected.
“What would you have to do?”
Reinhardt hemmed and hawed a little, but then gave in.
“All right, it's not exactly the most appropriate moment, but what the heck. Maybe Danny will take this as an incentive to get better as quickly as possible. I booked a trip for the four of us to Florida for the holidays this morning. I hope you're not angry with me for deciding this all by myself, but it was supposed to be a surprise.”
So he had managed the surprise! I decided to voluntarily take the most disgusting medication without complaining and to endure the most humiliating treatments in order to be fit again in time. I only had to look at the faces of Mom and Tim to get an idea of how surprised and enthusiastic I must have looked myself. It didn't look like anyone wanted to complain to Reinhardt about his solo effort.
The next few minutes passed in animated chatter about how thrilled everyone was with the idea. So the others chattered, I just listened. Tim's eyes lit up with joy, and he could hardly sit still. All of a sudden, my mother put her hands to her face in utter horror.
“My God, I completely forgot that I have to go to Paris for five days tomorrow!”
Oops, she felt the same way I did! I hadn't thought a single word about the fact that she was invited to an international congress of architects. She was even supposed to give a lecture! A great honor that had been bestowed on her for the first time. After a short discussion, we came to the conclusion that she could easily leave me alone for that time – with my current condition, however, the situation had changed drastically.
“I'll call them right now and cancel.“
Great, now I was overcome with guilt because I was making her miss something she had been looking forward to for weeks. It was written all over her face how sad she was, and when she went to pick up my phone, Reinhardt stopped her.
”Wait a minute, Maria. Let's see if we can't find a better solution. I know this is all very sudden, and it would certainly have been nicer to be able to discuss it all in a calmer way, but that can't be helped now. How about Danny coming with us and staying with us while you're in France. He would only be alone for an hour or two at a time, the rest of the time either Tim or I would be with him.”
Reinhardt earned his money as a freelance translator for foreign languages, mainly for specialized books. He was obviously very successful and – what was even more important for this particular case – he worked from home. In my mother's eyes, hope was spreading. Nevertheless, she still had her doubts.
"I don't know, that's a lot to ask of you. He also has to see his doctor again on Thursday.”
“That's not a problem, I can organize my working hours as I need to. We don't have a spare room, but Tim is sure to be willing to sleep on the living room couch for a few days.”
Although the latter nodded in agreement immediately, I decided not to evict him from his cozy room under any circumstances. But I wouldn't burden my mother with that now; there would be plenty of time to sort that out later.
"I still feel uncomfortable with the idea. I mean, Danny is sick and suffering, and I'm enjoying myself in Paris.”
“Spit for me from the Eiffel Tower and you shall be forgiven.“
General laughter.
”You see, Maria, he's making jokes again. You'll see, when you come back he'll be back on his feet. You can also call daily."
He had done it, my mother had been convinced.
“Well, I don't know how I'll ever thank you for this, but if all three of you agree, that's how we'll do it.“
”So that's all settled. What time does your plane leave?“
”7:55.“
”Hm. Then Danny should probably move today. It would be very tight tomorrow morning.”
We had to admit that he was right, though. The idea of having to get out of bed at five or so didn't seem particularly appealing to me. So it was agreed that Reinhardt and Tim would quickly drive home and prepare everything, while mom would pack everything I needed, and I would get dressed at my leisure. And that's exactly how it went.
Right in the middle of our preparations, the medical woman called with the relieving results of my blood tests. All the relevant values were in the ideal range, with no indication of a return of the leukemia. After she had heard this, my mother had to sit down for ten minutes and cry happily. I also felt several degrees better. Anyone who has ever seen a cancer ward from the inside can certainly understand that.
While we were waiting for our private taxi, Thomas called and wanted to know how I had fared. Since my throat was now more or less functioning again, I quickly filled him in on what had happened and would happen, gave him the Bergners' phone number, and he promised to keep me up to date on school. I would also take my Powerbook and modem with me, so I would be able to regularly check my email when I felt like it. If I was allowed to use the Bergners' phone line for it.
At around six, we were picked up by Reinhardt. I was wrapped up even thicker than usual for the few steps to the car and from the car to the Bergner front door, and that means something with me. I guess a sumo wrestler could easily have hidden behind me in this outfit. With arms spread and Prince Charles and glider ears on my shoulders. Fortunately, Reinhardt's car was more spacious than the SLK that my mother had given herself for her last birthday. The Stratus was well heated, so I survived the trip to my temporary home despite an intervening traffic jam. Shortly before seven I entered the room that would be my quarters for the next few days. Reinhardt pointed to Tim's lounger, which was already prepared as a bed.
“Make yourself comfortable, Danny. We'll give you a few minutes so that you can undress in peace. If you need anything, just call."
But before I could start with these tasks, my mother said goodbye to me, half in tears. She was suddenly in a bit of a hurry, no wonder, as she still had a lot to prepare at home for her big trip. She promised to call daily, wished me a speedy recovery and swore me to behave properly. After I had promised her that, she waved goodbye and left.
Now I could change undisturbed. I grabbed the pajamas at the top of my duffel bag and five minutes later my body had returned to its normal shape by losing several layers of clothing. I tested the lounger for comfort, found it to be extremely acceptable, and lay back comfortably in the soft pillows. Shortly thereafter, there was a knock at the door, and at my request, Tim came strolling into the room.
“Well, are you comfortable?“
”Thanks, I'm just fine. But we should talk about a few things. First of all, this is your room, so you can come in anytime. After your surprise visit earlier, there's not much of me that you haven't seen yet."
Tim chuckled to himself.
“And secondly, I don't feel entirely comfortable with the idea of stealing your room. I think it would be better if I slept in the living room with you, you have to go to school and need a good night's sleep. Besides, all your stuff is here in this room.”
“Absolutely not! You're sleeping here, you need a quiet place, the living room is completely unsuitable for that, because it faces the main street and it's always pretty noisy there. If I need something from the room, I'll just get it. Anyway, I plan on keeping you company from time to time, if I'm not getting on your nerves.”
“Tim, you're definitely not getting on my nerves. I just feel a little bad about the whole thing. I'm already a burden to you, and then I'm banishing you from your most personal realm.“
”Well, unfortunately I don't have two beds. Unless...“
”Unless what?”
“Well, we have a folding bed. I always sleep on that when my cousin comes to visit.“
”Why didn't you say so? I'll sleep on that thing, and you can have your bed to yourself.“
”I thought you might want a little privacy.”
“Uh, I don't feel like it at all right now. To be honest, I'd rather not have to brood here all alone, I'd just get stupid ideas and end up bored to death.“
”Are you well enough to bear my company?”
I listened to myself. The medication was working, I was still a bit queasy, and I was sure I wouldn't be able to do any great feats of strength right now, but in general I felt much better than I had in the morning. My skull was padded with cotton wool, so that crazy bowlers and bell cleaners no longer had an easy time of it with me.
“Don't worry. If I'm really feeling really bad and I want to suffer all alone, I'll let you know in time.“
”Okay. I'll tell Dad that we'll both be staying here. But only on one condition: you stay in bed, I'll take the folding bed. And there's no discussion about it!”
Oh God, the little guy could be really authoritarian! But well, better a half victory than none at all. I decided not to make a fuss about it, and so it happened that half an hour later half of the remaining space in the room was taken up by the aforementioned folding bed. Fortunately, as the name suggests, it could be folded up during the day and stored in a space-saving way.
Reinhardt asked us again whether we were sure about this arrangement, but when we both said yes, he was obviously very pleased with it. Incidentally, in contrast to me, both Bergners had heroically submitted to the flu shot, so I posed no danger to them.
Time flew by, and suddenly it was nine o'clock in the evening. In between, Tim had brought me a light supper to bed, and Reinhardt contributed my pills and juices. I got a little fright when he announced that it was time to take my temperature, but when Tim's father saw my slightly shocked expression, he just grinned and showed me the thermometer he intended to use. It was one of those new things that you can use to take your temperature in your ear, and I was extremely relieved. The technical marvel showed 38.5. After this somewhat reassuring measurement, I negated Reinhardt's question of whether I needed anything else, wished me good night and a speedy recovery, left the room, and I decided to try to fall asleep. Tim joined his father's wishes and said that he would watch a little TV in the living room. Actually, I wanted to tell him that he could do that in here, but somehow I suddenly lacked the strength, and my eyes closed. I must have slept pretty soundly, because I didn't realize how Tim came back into the room at some point and stretched out on the folding bed. I was probably too busy with my rather confused fever dreams.
I woke up around five o'clock in the morning, mainly because the painkillers had stopped working. Once again, I had the feeling that my skull was about to burst, but I didn't really know what to do about it. I really wished my mother were here with the suppository box, but tempting as the thought was, I would never be able to bring myself to ask Tim or even Reinhardt to help me out. So I would have to brave the pain.
For the next hour and a half, I suffered in agony, and when Tim got up, it took all my acting talent to hide my condition from him. I pretended to be still asleep and watched through tiny slits in my eyes as he grabbed a few things and then left the room, obviously on his way to the bathroom. Now I couldn't stand it anymore, I decided to take the painkiller myself. With fidgety fingers, I tore open the packaging and grabbed the slightly slippery thing, and then tried to get it to where it was needed. The latter was now easier said than done, because this destination was just characterized by being damn hard to see. After two or three unsuccessful attempts with a trembling hand, I finally landed a hit. Now I could only hope that the effect would be as fast as the day before.
I was lucky, after a few minutes the pain subsided. Relieved, I flopped back into bed just as Tim entered the room. Today his thermal underwear was bright red, and when he saw that I was awake, he gave me a radiant smile.
“Danny, you're awake! How are you, did you sleep well?“
”Thanks, I'm okay. Good morning. Well, ready to face the cruel reality of school?“
Tim laughed.
”It's not that cruel. At least not for me.“
”Oh yeah? How are you doing in school?”
“You really don't want to know.“
”Oh yes, I do!“
”Do you promise not to laugh at me?“
”Sure. I already promised you that on our first afternoon together, remember?“
”Right. All right. 1.0.”
WHAT? Oh God, I was in for it! If my mother found out, she would always remind me of how good my little brother is at school and that I should take him as an example. But I had always been satisfied with my grades – which were always between 1.8 and 2.2.
“That's not good at all, Tim, not at all. You're corrupting the standards.“
”I'm sorry, but that's no reason for me to intentionally fail assignments.“
”Huh, so I'll just have to live with it.“
”Exactly.”
Tim walked past me to pack up his school things at his desk, and his eyes fell on the empty suppository packaging. Damn, why didn't I think to get rid of that? Curious, he picked it up and looked at it.
“Cool, the doctor prescribed those for me a few months ago, too. They're so strong that I was literally a little high from them. But the pain was gone in no time.“
I could confirm that, my headache had also lost the battle for the moment.
”Did you give yourself that thing?”
I nodded.
“And you waited until I was in the bathroom?”
I nodded again.
“How long have you been in pain?”
“For an hour or two.”
“Stupid. You could have just woken me up and I would have helped you with it.”
"Hey, maybe I'm embarrassed in front of you!”
“Uh, in case you've forgotten: I'm your brother, no need to be embarrassed around me. Besides, I got to see that side of you yesterday. And even if you didn't want my help, you didn't have to wait for me to leave to help yourself.”
What's this, a reversal of roles? Just three days ago, I was trying to teach him that we were siblings and could trust each other with anything. Okay, I plead mitigating circumstances. My mind was just a bit addled due to illness.
"All right, I get it. No more false modesty, especially in emergencies.”
“I should hope so. Well, I have to get dressed, I have to leave in ten minutes. Dad and I have already had breakfast, should I tell him when I leave to make something for you?“
”No, thanks. I don't feel like eating yet."
My mother would put a red dot on the calendar for that statement.
“Okay, whatever you say. But don't be embarrassed to call him if you need anything, I'll leave the door ajar.“
During our conversation, he had slipped into his shirt and trousers, then grabbed his school bag and went to the door.
”Well then, have a good rest. And get better. Bye.“
”Have fun. See you this afternoon.”
And he disappeared, leaving the door ajar as promised. Well, it was kind of nice to be the center of attention and to be mothered by everyone. However, it came at a high price with the pain and the rest of the symptoms.
I managed to fall asleep again, and was only woken by a hand stroking my hair. I forced my eyes to open and looked into the smiling face of Tim's father.
"Good morning, you problem child. How are you today?”
“Good morning. I'm fine now, but I had a headache again this morning.“
”Did you take something for it?“
”Yes, and it worked.“
”Well, that's good. Let me take your temperature first."
The miracle thermometer was used again and showed 37.9 at the end of the measurement. Well, it could be better.
“Are you hungry?“
Hm. Interesting question. I think so.
”Yes.“
”How about a warm pudding? With tea? You have to take your medicine anyway.“
”Okay.”
“Good. I'll be back in a quarter of an hour. I hope you can hold out that long. By the way, your mother called from the airport."
I looked at my watch. It was already half past nine. So she must be close to Paris by now. Well, she deserved it. She had worked hard for it.
In the meantime, Reinhardt had disappeared from the room, and I wondered where and how I should eat. It would probably be best to go to the kitchen with him. I sat up and tried hanging my feet over the edge of the bed. No negative reactions. So I slipped into my slippers and got up slowly and carefully. I was a little dazed, but not so bad that I couldn't make it. I had to go to the bathroom first anyway. Although I had no idea where to find it. So I shuffled into the kitchen, where the host looked up in astonishment when he saw me standing in the doorway.
“Reinhardt, could you please tell me where the restroom is?“
”The last door on the left, at the end of the corridor. Tell me, are you sure you can make it there on your own?“
”I think so. But if you hear a loud crash, please come and see what's going on.”
“Don't joke about that, young man! I promised Maria I'd take good care of you. And I intend to keep that promise!“
”All right. But I'll be fine, don't worry.“
”All right.”
With slow steps, I made my way to the door in question, and indeed, a spacious bathroom was hidden behind it. I took care of what I had come for, washed my hands, and got the fright of my life. When I looked in the mirror, a fearsome figure stared back at me. My eyes were set in dark hollows, and to call my complexion chalk white would have been a flattery. And all this after just a day and a half! I tore my eyes away from the sight and made my way back to the kitchen. Reinhardt was just about to pack my breakfast on a tray and take it to Tim's room. I was able to convince him that I would rather eat in the kitchen.
“Well, since you're already here, sit down."
I sat down in the seating area and looked at the pudding plate in front of me with mixed feelings. On the one hand, I felt very hungry, but on the other hand, the sight of the food made me feel a little sick again. Oh well. I didn't feel like starving, and it couldn't be any more than coming out again. Spoon by spoonful, I put the chocolate pudding into my mouth, sipping hot tea repeatedly. It didn't take long for the dish to be empty; my morning pill ration had also found its way into my stomach. As I leaned back, I could see that Reinhardt had a satisfied look on his face.
"So, the world looks a lot better again, doesn't it?”
“That's right, I needed something in my stomach now. Thanks. Oh, by the way, could you do me a favor?“
”Sure, go ahead.“
”Could you cover all the mirrors in the house? The sight of my face almost made me faint earlier.“
”Well, you don't seem to have lost your sense of humor.”
“It's pure self-defense, otherwise I wouldn't be able to stand all this crap.“
”How about it, are you going to lie down again?“
”In a minute. I just want to sit for a while, I've been lying down almost all the time for the last 24 hours.”
“I understand. But it's not very comfortable here. What do you think about going into the living room? You can sit comfortably on the couch, and if it gets too much for you, you can just stretch out. I'd like to discuss something with you anyway, of course only if it's not too much for you.”
Now he had sparked my curiosity. I was doing relatively well at the moment, and I didn't feel like being alone in Tim's room anyway.
“Okay.”
"Go ahead, you know where it is. I'll just put the dishes in the dishwasher and then come.”
So I slowly crept into the living room and sat cross-legged on the couch. A quick glance around allowed me to see that a technology freak was obviously at home here. A TV with a monster picture tube, plus a stereo system from a brand where the nameplate alone cost a three-digit sum. Tim's father was obviously not only professionally but also financially successful. No wonder he could afford to jet off to Florida with four people.
While I was still thinking about these things, Reinhardt came into the room, bringing a quilt. He brought it to me and put it around my shoulders.
"Here, it's not quite as warm as in the kitchen. We don't want to take any more risks.”
Anyone who brought me a warm blanket automatically got a lot of brownie points from me. I pulled it tightly around my body and snuggled into it. Reinhardt sat down in a chair across from me and just looked at me for a while. Then he got down to business.
"So, Danny, first of all, if it gets too much for you, just say so and we'll postpone it. There's really no rush.”
“It's okay, I'll let you know in good time before I fall off my stool.“
He laughed.
”Good. But now seriously. Danny, I love your mother.“
I had already gathered that.
”And I like you too, very much.“
That sounded really encouraging.
”And I know that Tim feels the same way.”
It was getting better and better.
"Danny, Maria and I would like to all move in together and become a real family. But it's not something that the two of us oldies can decide on our own, you two boys have at least as much say in the matter. I would like to know how you feel about it, whether you could get used to the idea, and I would like to hear your honest opinion. I guess it's not all that surprising for you."
That's right. I had been expecting such a proposal for quite a while now. Okay. He wanted the unvarnished truth? He should get it.
“Reinhardt, first of all, you should know that the most important thing for me is that my mother is happy. She's already had to put up with a lot, first my illness, then the death of my father. If it makes her happy, I would even put up with a monster of a stepfather and a pesky little brother.”
An expression of disbelief and shock spread across Reinhardt's face. He started to say something, but I interrupted him.
“Wait a minute, I'm not finished yet! I said I would endure that too. But I'm really very happy that I don't have to endure that, but instead get people like you and Tim.”
Relief showed on his face.
“Well, I have to tell you, I'll probably have to get used to your sense of humor first.“
”Don't worry, you will.“
”So you agree?“
”You have my blessing. But what about Tim?”
“Oh, you don't have to worry about that! He likes Maria very much, she probably gives him what he has been missing since his mother disappeared. I think I have been a reasonably good father, but I could never replace his mother. Well, and as for you..."
I was hanging on his every word.
“... he really admires you. I don't know how you've managed it in such a short time, but when he talks about you, his eyes light up. He looks up to you, and if you don't do something really stupid, you've gained not only a little brother but also your biggest fan.”
My God, he really didn't need to put me on such a pedestal. On the other hand, I was pleased that Tim thought so highly of me.
“I hope that clears up any doubts you might still have had. We would like to move in together at the beginning of next year. At first we thought about the time between Christmas and New Year, but then we decided that we would rather enjoy those days together somewhere.”
“It won't be up to me. Just let me know the exact date in good time so that I can quickly sprain my ankle and avoid having to help with the heavy lifting.“
”Oh no, you won't get off that easily! Self-mutilation is severely punished.”
Now we both laughed, and the slight tension that had hung over us at the beginning of the conversation had completely disappeared. However, an important question had not yet been raised. I had to change that.
"Now please tell me where we will live together. Here or with us?”
“As much as I like it here, it would probably be a bit too cramped for four people. We need a living room, a bedroom, a large study, and depending on how you and Tim decide, one or two children's rooms. Please excuse the term 'children's room'.“
”So you'll both be moving in with us.”
It was actually logical, we had more than enough space. When my parents planned and built the house, they immediately expected more family members to move in. It was never planned that I would remain an only child, and both my father and mother also firmly believed in the idea of a multigenerational house. There was enough space to accommodate my family later, including two or three children – well, back then no one suspected that little Danny, who had been put in the corner in kindergarten for looking up a girl's skirt, would later switch to the other side. So, what about the children's rooms?
“I assume Tim wants his own room, right?“
”Not really. He said he'd like to share a room with you, but only if it's okay with you.”
Was I okay with that? A difficult question. On the one hand, I really liked the idea – and without any ulterior motives. I just liked having Tim around. On the other hand, I wasn't quite sure how this would affect my feelings towards him. Well, I'd just have to pull myself together.
“I wouldn't have any problems with that. And if, contrary to expectations, it doesn't work out, we can always go our separate ways."
But there was something else. This was the right time for the final test for Tim's father. This test could still spoil everything, but better now than later, when nothing could be done.
“Reinhardt, there is something you should know about me. There is one thing that could possibly change your opinion of me.“
”What is it? You don't have a dead body in your bed drawer, do you?"
Contrary to my normal nature, I didn't feel like making jokes at all.
“I'm really serious. I'll just say it, there's no way to teach you this gently anyway. Reinhardt, I'm gay.“
To describe his reaction as stunned would have been a huge understatement. Well, at least he hadn't jumped down my throat yet.
”You're gay? You?“
”Yep.”
“I'll have to digest that for a while. I really didn't think so.“
”Does that change anything between us?“
”Indeed, that changes a lot!"
Reinhardt rose from his chair and came to me. Now I was a little worried. But he just sat down next to me and took me in his arms.
“Silly. The only thing that changes is that at some point I will only have one daughter-in-law instead of two, and a son-in-law instead of none."
Phew, now it was my turn to look relieved. However, if I were him, I wouldn't be so sure about the one daughter-in-law either. Reinhardt grinned at me.
“I'm sorry, but revenge is blood sausage. How do you think I felt earlier when you started talking about the 'monster of a stepfather'?"
Okay, okay. I guess I had that coming.
“Danny, you're still the same nice boy I'd like to have as a son. What I don't know is how Tim will react to this. I actually hope that I have raised him to be a tolerant person, but we have never spoken directly about this topic.”
“Tim has known since Saturday afternoon.“
So, now I had completely thrown Reinhardt off track. He stared at me with wide-open eyes.
”And how did he react?!“
”Uh, do I really have to answer that question now? After all, you have spoken to him a few more times since then, haven't you?”
“Huh, right. Sorry, but that caught me a bit off guard. It was pretty brave of you to tell him right at the first meeting.“
”It wasn't. It was pretty stupid.“
”You'll have to explain that to me now, though.”
And I told him about the chain of unfortunate circumstances that led to the discovery of my big secret. When I was finished, Reinhardt laughed.
“That's what you call a stupid turn of events. So, do you regret it now?”
"No, how could I, when Tim reacted so well. And now you too. Thank you.”
As a precaution, I had left out the fact that Tim himself was plagued by some doubts about himself in my story. That was something Tim had to come up with himself when he was ready to do so.
"No need to thank me. It shouldn't be anything special. So, now that we've been talking for quite a while, how are you doing? Are you not getting too much of it?”
Hm, now that he said it. I did feel a little weak – on the other hand, our conversation had quite successfully distracted me from my condition. Still.
“I think I'll lie down again for a while.”
"Do that. It's about time for your next pill anyway, I'll bring it to your room then.”
And so I found myself a few minutes later in Tim's bed, still sitting upright against the wall, awaiting the approach of the poison bomber. I was not disappointed; it wasn't long before Reinhardt appeared with pills and drops – the side effects of which I'd rather not even begin to think about. But there was no way around the disgusting stuff, so I swallowed it all bravely.
“Good boy, my little one.”
That brought a wry smile to my face.
"Try to get some sleep. Tim will be home around half past one, and I'll prepare a quick lunch for us. Would you like something then too?”
“I can't say right now. If I should sleep, you'd better let me. I'll let you know when I need something.“
”All right. Well, I'll leave the door open a little."
And then I was alone again. I decided to follow Reinhardt's advice, and sure enough, I fell asleep shortly afterwards.
Panic. Screaming people. The calm voice of a stewardess. Screeching metal. Fire. Flashing lights. Then darkness. And a voice from afar.
"Danny... Danny, come to yourself. It's just a dream... wake up... come on... please wake up...”
The voice slowly pulled my mind out of the terrible, burning dungeon in which it was trapped. I opened my eyes and saw the worried and nevertheless pretty face of Tim.
"Come on, Danny, everything's fine. It was all just a bad dream.”
It certainly had been. I knew this dream very well, I remembered it only too well. After my father's death, I had had it every night for months, later less and less often, but it had only been about a year since I had finally been left in peace. At least that's what I thought. Why had it come back now? Was it just because of my already tense mental state?
Tim was sitting half on the bed, holding me in his strong swimmer arms.
“Danny, it's all right. You were only dreaming. Are you all right again?”
At that very moment, Reinhardt stormed into the room.
“What happened? Tim, what's going on?”
"Danny had a nightmare, it took me a while to wake him up.”
“I see. Danny, are you okay?"
I tried to pull myself together, but I was still shaking all over. My pajamas were completely soaked with sweat again, and my eyes were also only providing a rather blurry image. But I had to answer something, so I put all my self-control into my shaky voice.
“I'm fine now. It was just so... so real. So intense.“
I looked my brother in the eye.
”Thanks for getting me out of there.“
”You're welcome. Would you like to lie down again now?“
”Please hold me for another minute until I've calmed down.”
While Tim did just that and his father looked for a dry pair of pajamas for me, I found the time to glance at my watch. It was just before six; I had slept through the whole afternoon. Or almost slept through it, because I vaguely remembered Reinhardt waking me briefly at some point and giving me my medication.
Slowly but surely, calm returned to me, and I told Tim that he could let go of me again – not without thanking him again. His father handed me the new pajamas.
“It's probably better if you change. I'll also bring fresh sheets in a minute.”
"Don't worry about it, you guys have enough on your hands with me as it is.”
“No way. Besides, I've already prepared a complete set of bedding. When Tim had the flu, it was the same for him. And when everything is done, I'll bring you a light supper and your medication.”
Well, it looked as if I had no say in the matter. With Tim's help, I got up from the bed to give Reinhardt the opportunity to remove the soaked bedding. I settled down on the folding bed, and shortly afterwards Tim's father had disappeared from the room. Three minutes later he was back, rearranging the bed. When that was done, he left me alone with Tim again.
“I'll be back in ten minutes with dinner. When I come back, I want you to be in bed, in dry clothes."
Aye aye, sir. I started to peel off the top of my pajamas. It should have been a simple matter, but it was as difficult as... as clearing the driveway in 8 inches of fresh snow. Eventually I made it, and I realized that I couldn't just put on the fresh clothes. I had sweated like a pig several times now, and no matter how dirty I was, I had to wash it off my body.
“Tim, can you get your father?”
"What's the matter, are you feeling worse?”
“No, but we have to change the plans a little. Please go get him, okay?“
”Whatever you say. I'll be right back."
In fact, I could barely blink twice, and the two of them were standing in the room again with worried expressions.
“What is it, Danny? Do you need something?“
”Reinhardt, I have to take a shower. I stink, and I feel extremely dirty.“
”Danny, I can imagine that, but I don't know if a shower is such a good idea. You can hardly stand on your feet as it is."
I couldn't really disagree with that. Tim, however, had an idea.
“He could go into the tub. We'll help him get in and out, and while he's in there, one of us will make sure that nothing happens.“
Reinhardt looked at me questioningly.
”What do you think, Danny? It's either that or wash you here in bed."
Nah, I wasn't that frail. At least I hoped not.
“Let's try the tub.“
”Good. I'll run the water.“
”Should I get towels?“
”No, I'll do it. You stay here and don't let Danny out of your sight."
Hah, like I'd run away!
Fifteen minutes later, Reinhardt came back to us. He handed me a robe.
"Take off your pants right here and put this on. It's too tight in the bathroom.”
Easier said than done. In the end, Tim had to help me get rid of my socks and pants. Since I was still a little embarrassed in front of him, I got so red in the face from the whole affair that it could have passed for an overripe cherry. Fortunately, I was so turned on that no other body part even got any stupid ideas.
We had just finished undressing when Tim's father came to pick us up. Carefully guided from both sides, I managed the way to the bathroom. It was strange, only a few hours earlier I had covered the same distance relatively effortlessly under my own steam.
Once in the bathroom, a bathtub filled with inviting warm water awaited me. Reinhardt took my robe from me, and then the three of us stood somewhat indecisively at the edge of the tub.
"Hm, how do we get you in here without you slipping or hurting yourself?”
Reinhardt took a good look at my entire body.
“Tell me, when was the last time someone picked you up?” Literally, I mean.
Huh, not that, please not that! That was just too ernie... Ah. Before I could even start to protest, Reinhardt had used his size and strength to lift me off the ground, picked me up like a baby, and now let me sink slowly and carefully into the water.
“Is the water okay? Not too hot or too cold?”
"Just right.”
“Good. Just stay there for five minutes. Do you want me to help you wash or should Tim do it?“
Please not Tim. It was bad enough that he had to watch all this. His strong, big brother – helpless like a toddler.
”You.”
“Okay. Tim, please stay here and make sure nothing happens.“
”All right, Dad."
I leaned back and tried to sink as much body surface area as possible into the pleasantly warm water. I managed to get only my head and the tips of my knees sticking out in the end. Somehow I felt a little better.
“You okay, Danny?“
I glanced over at Tim, who was sitting on a stool, looking at me with concern.
”Thanks, that's great. I'm sorry to be such a burden to you guys.“
”Someone recently told me to stop apologizing all the time. I'm just going to pass that advice on to you now.”
Okay, okay. I got a taste of my own medicine. It wasn't long before Reinhardt reappeared in the bathroom and sent Tim to the kitchen to watch the water boil.
"So, let's get started. How would you like me to help you?”
“I think it's enough if you scrub my back, I'll hopefully manage the rest on my own.“
”As you like. But please don't be embarrassed if you need more help. I can assure you that there is nothing that I haven't already seen or done on Tim.”
Very reassuring. Nevertheless, I was glad that I really only needed help with my back. The wonderfully warm water had revived my spirits a little. A few minutes later, everything was done, I got out of the tub and wanted to reach for a large bath towel. Reinhardt, however, stopped me and rinsed the soap off me with the shower hose. Then he took the bath towel, wrapped me in it and then lifted me out of the tub again. All this with an ease as if I weighed nothing at all.
"So, I suppose you want to rub yourself off alone?”
Bull's eye. When I was dry and dressed again, Reinhardt took me back to Tim's room. I lay down, was left alone for a short time and then had my dinner served. A few slices of toast, tea and the inevitable medication. I bravely devoured it all, and just as I had finished, the phone rang. Tim's father rushed off and came back into the room shortly afterwards with the phone. I had a pretty good idea who was on the other end of the line, and my hunch was immediately confirmed.
“Danny, it's your mother. Would you talk to her?”
I took the phone and answered.
“Danny, how are you? You sound pretty good.”
It's a good thing she didn't call half an hour earlier.
“Thanks, I'm doing much better. Reinhardt and Tim are taking really good care of me. So, how's Paris?“
”It's still standing. It's a beautiful city, the city of love. Maybe I should send you here. Maybe you'll find a handsome boy for yourself here. Oops – I hope the call isn't on speakerphone! I really didn't want to give you away.”
That now caused a hoarse cawing, which, with a lot of imagination, could pass for laughter.
“Don't worry, it's not on speakerphone. And even if it was, they both know.”
"What? You told them? So, how did it go?”
“Quite excellently. Don't worry about that. But I'll tell you all about it when you get back here, not that the long-distance call will make you poor. I'll give you your sweetheart again."
The latter smiled, picked up the phone again, and left the room with it. Well, secret meetings!
While Reinhardt was driving up the phone bill a little, Tim cleared away the remains of my meal. Five minutes later, everyone was back in Tim's room. Reinhardt looked at me a little reproachfully.
"But that wasn't the whole truth you told your mother. As if you were doing much better.”
“I hope you didn't betray me. I want her to enjoy herself in Paris. If I had told her what was really wrong with me today, she would have jumped on the next plane and would be here in a few hours.”
“I see what you mean. I didn't tell her anything, and I won't for the time being. But if you get worse, I won't be able to keep it from her. Agreed?“
”I can live with that.“
”Good. How are you doing now, have you survived the exertions to some extent?”
“I think so. What I need now is a quiet, restful night without headaches and other problems.“
”Then you'd better try to sleep. You also have something for pain, better take some of that right away, as a preventive. These suppositories are so strong that they should last until tomorrow morning.”
“Okay, I'll squeeze one of those things in.“
”Do you want me to help you?“
I thought back and forth. What the heck, it wouldn't make any difference now.
”Okay.“
”Good. Tim, in the meantime, would you please get the clinical thermometer?”
Tim did as he was told, and while he was on his way, his father gave me the painkiller. Then the thermometer was still in use, showing 38.8, and shortly afterwards my two orderlies left the room and left me to my own devices. Fortunately, I didn't have much time to brood, because after just a few minutes I fell asleep dreamlessly into Morpheus' arms.
All right, now it was time to be strong. Danny, don't be a wimp, you have to go through with it. What could possibly happen? But no matter how much I kept telling myself that, no matter how often I went over the statistics in my head, I still had a bad feeling. Of course, this affected my general condition, and slowly but surely I fell behind the others. Which, of course, was noticed immediately. Reinhardt also dropped back.
“You okay, Danny?”
“Yeah, I'm fine, great, wonderful.”
“You're a lousy liar.”
“I know. But I had to try.”
"Come on, let's go, it'll be okay.”
He put his huge right arm around my body, and together we walked through the narrow passenger tunnel to the entrance of the Airbus that was to take us to Orlando. Now it should be clear what had thrown me off track. Okay, the anticipation of Florida was huge, but the closer the day of departure approached, the more aware I became that it inevitably meant having to get on a plane. This is something I hadn't done since my father died. Mom did, though it took a lot of effort for her at first, too, but in the last few years she had flown across Germany and halfway across Europe. I, on the other hand... well, as I said, I was well aware that flying is a very safe form of transportation. I also knew all the physical principles, but still I had nagging doubts. I mean, these turbine-powered wannabe birds are heavy as hell and only kept in the air by tricks – no matter how scientifically sound these tricks may be – and when these tricks fail, the way down is damn long and the impact is damn hard and final. But wait, I had to pull myself together now; after all, it was not acceptable for me to spoil the others' well-deserved vacation with my (albeit understandable) cowardice. Besides, it was much too late to jump off now anyway. Jump off? Oops, apt choice of words.
With a look of defiance on my face, I gathered all my courage and stepped into the plane with Reinhardt, taking a reasonably firm step. After all, the reward for my courage was really something special, at least for someone like me. Almost two weeks out of the cold prevailing in Germany and off to a region where we would be able to walk around in T-shirts and shorts! That was more or less my idea of paradise. Incidentally, my cocky little brother had rushed ahead as if he feared that the plane would take off without him. Ah yes, the enthusiasm of youth!
Wait a minute, some of you might say. This guy was just lying in a strange bed, dying of a terrible disease, and now suddenly he's on his way to the land of the Big Mac? Well, folks, I've decided to spare myself (and you) the heart-rending description of my ordeal over the last two weeks. With slight improvements every day, it was mostly a repetition of what had happened on my first day with the Bergners. Fortunately, a few days ago the family medicine woman had given the green light for the trip to Uncle Sam, so that I could board the plane in good (or not so good) spirits, even though I didn't feel 100% recovered yet. The week I spent with Tim and his father had the pleasant effect of bringing the three of us together, which my mother was also very happy to see when she returned from the baguette capital. By the way, she had brought me a real Parisian! Well, unfortunately not one on two legs, but one wrapped in foil. And now he was on his way to Florida with me in my wallet – not that I had any increased hopes of being able to use him there.
But let's get back to the text and back on the plane. When Reinhardt allowed us a first glimpse of the tickets at the baggage drop-off, my eyes almost popped out of my sockets. It actually said Business Class! I briefly searched my memory, but found no indication of a recent lottery win. Both families were doing well financially, but spending that much money on a means of transportation seemed a bit excessive to me. I certainly wouldn't complain, but I was a little relieved when Tim's father explained how we came to this honor. It turned out that he had been translating technical literature for this airline for quite some time, with the result that he had free business class tickets himself and his companion got this luxury in economy class. I would ask him if he happened to work for Lincoln, too. It was only a few months until my 18th birthday, when I would be eligible for a driver's license, and a Lincoln Navigator at a discount price would make my luck complete. Okay, not quite complete, but I was still angling for the right passenger. It had to work out sometime!
Once on the plane, we were shown to our seats, and I generously let Tim have the window seat. That way, I hoped not to notice too much of the take-off. I made myself comfortable and waited for the things to come. For a while I watched the other passengers, then I dug out the information material that the operators of the flying metal heap provided for the amusement of the passengers. A glossy brochure from which the safety instructions jumped into my face as soon as I opened it. Very reassuring. At the sight of my tortured facial expressions, Tim giggled next to me.
“Really that bad?“
”Uh... um... yes. Do they really have to explicitly point out that something could happen?“
”I think so, just to protect themselves against lawsuits for damages.”
Very nice. I leafed through and found some more reassuring things, for example, the video and radio program and duty-free shopping. I felt a slight relaxation spreading and I didn't even notice how the time of departure was getting closer and closer. I was startled by the captain's voice, who announced that the flight attendants would now begin with the safety briefing.
“Not that too!“
My mother, who was sitting behind Tim and me with Reinhardt, leaned forward and whispered soothingly in my ear.
”You'll have to get through it, it won't take long.”
Like the proverbial sheep led to the slaughter, I endured the speech, and when it was over, I wished it would go on for a few more hours. It had suddenly occurred to me that the end of the drivel meant that takeoff was imminent. The flight attendants handed out sweets to help with the equalization of pressure (I would have preferred a general anesthetic), and then the plane started to taxi. I made myself very small in my seat and clenched my hands around the seat backs. Tim was no longer amused but rather concerned.
"We're not taking off yet, we have to taxi to the runway first.”
My level of tension dropped to 99%. Tim smiled reassuringly at me and placed his left hand on top of my right. 98%. The taxiing took quite a while, and a crazy thought flashed through my mind. 'Thank God we're taxiing to Florida!' 97%. We made a few turns across the airport. 96%. The plane came to a halt. 'Machine broken, flight canceled!' 25% and falling! (Yes, yes, I know: total nonsense. But what doesn't go through your mind when you don't know where to turn with fear.) Suddenly, there was a roar, the machine started to tremble and then began to move faster and faster. I was back to 100%. They would definitely need to replace the armrests after my flight, they were guaranteed to be permanently decorated with the imprints of my fingernails. I didn't want to be aware of any of this and squinted my eyes. I didn't have a total blackout, but I wasn't far from it either.
I can no longer say how long I remained in this state of rigidity, but when I was able to perceive my surroundings again, the roaring and shaking had stopped, and I now felt a bit like I was in a fast, comfortable car on a freshly paved highway. I took a careful look around and saw nothing but relaxed faces. Apparently, everything had worked as planned, and we were about to cover the first few kilometers on the way to Disney's wonderland. I turned my head to the right, and from there Tim looked at me with a grin that was so wide that it almost burst the boundaries of his face.
“Well, survived?”
“Just about.”
"Look at that.”
My brother pointed at the screen in front of my eyes. I had no idea what he intended to do with it, but the constantly rising altitude reading was not particularly reassuring. But what the heck, nothing could be done about it now anyway, so I thought I'd better come to terms with my situation. I reached for the book I had brought with me, and shortly afterwards I was surprisingly completely absorbed in the plot.
A little while later – the mysterious murderer in my crime novel had just struck for the third time – I was torn out of the story. A stewardess (wait, stop, objection: a flight attendant) was distributing drinks and snacks. Tim and I helped ourselves, the friendly lady wandered on through the rows, then the voice of the conqueror of the skies sounded to tell us that we could now take a look at the nightly Hamburg, many kilometers below us. This sight – Tim kindly let me look out the window too, which I initially only did with a little hesitation – made up for a lot. I would never have believed that you could see everything so clearly from this height. A few cars, a fully lit soccer stadium – simply magnificent. By now I was hanging with my whole body on my brother's, and our heads were pressed against the small window. A few minutes later it was all over, and we sorted ourselves back into our own seats.
“Well, Danny, wasn't that a great sight?“
”You can say that again. Is it always like that?“
”No, on my previous flights I was never so lucky. Either we were traveling during the day or there were too many clouds between the ground and us. Old St. Peter seems to be well-disposed towards you.”
“Well, I have to have a little luck sometimes. Will we see more of this today?“
”If the weather plays along, yes. The next stop would be Glasgow, and after the big water, Washington.“
”Great!“
”Well, where did your fear of flying suddenly go?“
”What fear of flying? Not me.”
“Haha. If you're so easily cured, I'll quickly get rid of your fear of water too.“
”Ugh. Don't remind me of that. Right now, I have enough to do with getting over flying at ten thousand meters without a net or parachute. To top it all off, I'll soon be flying over one of the largest bodies of water in the world.”
But Tim was right. I was now actually much more relaxed and could sit back in my chair relatively relaxed. Whereby one thing slowly but surely became clear to me.
"Tell me, Tim, is it always so cold in airplanes?”
“Well, it's certainly not particularly warm. Look at the outside temperature: minus 55 degrees. Every degree they heat costs extra fuel. So they prefer to distribute blankets. Do you need one?”
“No thanks, not yet. But if I get the idea to take a nap later on, I wouldn't mind a blanket.“
”As you wish."
At least I now knew why we hadn't already changed into our much more summery Florida clothes at the airport back home, but would wait until we arrived in the Sunshine State.
We spent the time until overflying Glasgow reading and following the in-flight radio programs. Above the Scottish capital, we were again very lucky with the weather, and the experience of Hamburg was repeated. Shortly afterwards, dinner was served, which... well, let's just say it was edible. After clearing the tables, the picture on the monitors changed, and the main movie of the flight was announced. Armageddon. Well, I hadn't seen that one yet, so I switched the headphones to the appropriate channel and spent the next two hours watching humanity's struggle for survival. Not bad, actually, but I couldn't quite understand what the girls at my school saw in Ben Affleck.
After the movie ended, I grabbed one of the blankets I mentioned earlier and slept for a good two hours. At least I could dream about having solid ground under my feet. But since something good never lasts forever, I was awakened by a gentle shaking of my shoulder.
"Danny, wake up.”
I tried to collect my thoughts a little, and after a few confused moments I actually managed to come up with an answer.
“What is it, are we there already?”
"No, but you have to fasten your seat belt. The captain has announced turbulence.”
Great! Just what I needed to top off my luck. I sat up straight and clicked the seat belt into place. Sure enough, an extremely unpleasant shaking started shortly thereafter. The plane wobbled in all available directions, and sometimes I could literally feel it sagging quite a bit. The mood in the cabin was correspondingly tense; you could literally feel the tension.
Our ordeal lasted about a quarter of an hour, after which the flight attendants had their hands full collecting the famous bags. Surprisingly, I didn't need mine – unlike my oh-so-cool little brother. But wait, I wouldn't make fun of him under any circumstances, since I had repeatedly given up on my own life during those 15 long minutes.
Well, luckily not only the good moments in life come to an end, but the bad ones too, and we found ourselves in air layers that were not quite so mixed up. Tim, as I said, was quite pale – and could now understand my situation much better. Mom and Reinhardt had also not remained completely unimpressed by the events of the last few minutes. If I had understood correctly, the flight attendant had to take two bags from the row behind us. It then took about half an hour for everyone to calm down again to some extent and for the normal on-board program to start again with short films and a small snack.
The rest of the flight went by in a flash. What's that stupid saying again? Well, stupid but true. Washington was hidden under a thick cloud cover – well, maybe George had just been visited by an intern and wanted to avoid being watched from above. Maybe it wasn't clouds at all, but rather cigar smoke.
The last stretch was down the coast towards Orlando, where we landed at around 10:30 p.m. Just an hour and a half later, we had completed the immigration formalities, found our luggage, changed, and were about to look for a taxi to the hotel when suddenly the name “Bergner” was called out. So we made our way to the information desk as requested, where a man in the airline's uniform was waiting for us. The latter actually seemed to be quite grateful to Reinhardt; the employee waiting for us turned out to be our driver, who now took us to the hotel in a minibus (I deliberately use this word; the word “van”, which has become fashionable in our country, would be a significant understatement considering the size of the vehicle).
After a ride on still quite busy streets, we reached our accommodation for the next few days: a resort right at the Magic Kingdom. Reinhardt really splashed out, as was evident shortly afterwards when we were led to a breathtaking suite. A large living room, two bedrooms, each with two huge beds and a private bathroom with a whirlpool, of course, TV sets everywhere (okay, not everywhere, in the bathrooms they had inexplicably done without them), and fully air-conditioned. In two simple words: pure luxury.
However, we decided against further explorations due to the late hour. We quickly packed the most necessary things and shortly afterwards we were lying in bed. Despite the rather exciting hours that had passed, sleep came quickly this time.
It was only 8 o'clock and I was already awake. And that on vacation. And it only took me about an hour to figure out where I was. No, it wasn't that bad, but I was a bit puzzled to wake up in a bed in which I could have gotten lost because of its size. All this in a slightly over-decorated room. For my taste, it was all a bit over the top, but I guess that was typically American. Before I could indulge in further analysis, however, I was torn out of my ruminations.
“Hello sleepyhead. Well, finally awake?"
An unpleasantly perky Tim stood grinning happily in the bathroom doorway, wearing only skin-tight boxer shorts. This sight was pure psychological terror for my lonely heart, and I once again cursed the fact that – contrary to certain prejudices – you can't be gay by choice. My little brother would have been worth any effort in this regard. But it just wasn't meant to be.
“How come you're already awake? They always say that little kids need their sleep.”
“If I didn't need all my energy for today, I'd show you who's a little kid around here.”
"Don't promise what you can't keep, Timmy!”
“Argh! Now you're done!“
With these words, my little brother bridged the few steps between the bathroom door and my bed, only to stop abruptly just over an arm's length away. He stared at me with a brooding look.
”Wait a minute. What's that, you know karate?“
”You can count on it.”
“Okay, apology accepted. You really had a lot of luck now. But you shouldn't push your luck too far. If you don't hurry up and get out of bed, you're guaranteed to get into trouble with our elders. We have a lot planned for today.”
Normally, I would have been annoyed by such nagging, but since I myself was only too eager to discover my surroundings, I generously overlooked it this time. I flung off the blanket, which, for a change (and in contrast to wintry German climes), did not end in a shivering fit.
"Tim, have you already found out what the thermometer says?”
“Around eighteen degrees. And it should get up to twenty-five.“
”Hallelujah! And where did you get this divine news?”
Tim pointed with his right arm in the direction of the television, which – as I only now noticed – was flickering silently and showing current weather data. I sent a short prayer to heaven regarding the reliability of American weather forecasters and then made my way to the bathroom.
Fifteen minutes later I entered the room again, dressed more or less the same as Tim when I woke up, with the only difference that I was less into skin-tight clothes. Reinhardt's son had meanwhile completed his wardrobe and was standing in the room in a T-shirt and blue jeans cut just below the knees. Since this seemed to me to be quite appropriate for the temperatures, I followed his example and joined him shortly afterwards in a very similar outfit. Tim turned off the TV, then we went to the “living room” of the suite, where we were already expected by Mutti and Reinhardt.
"Well, have the young people finally woken up?”
“Oh, Reinhardt, leave them alone. Yesterday was really exhausting.“
”I didn't mean it like that. Good morning everyone.“
The morning actually looked good. However, it would have been even better if my stomach wasn't rumbling so loudly.
”How about breakfast?“
”We were just waiting for you. So come on, everyone who's hungry follow me.”
He didn't need to ask for long. The caravan set in motion, and after a march through long corridors and the ride with an elevator, we found a cozy table for four in one of the hotel restaurants. Ten minutes later, our breakfast was in front of us, and it was quite different from what we were used to at home. Toast (rather limp toast) with ham, bacon and fried egg, with tea and coffee (which our parents said was not particularly good). Well, as unusual as the food combination was (my mother and I usually prefer the “sweet alternative” for breakfast, i.e. rolls and jam), the stuff was definitely filling. I would have to get used to the taste first, but it didn't taste bad.
Now that this extremely important need had been satisfied, we turned to planning the day together. Tim was the most impatient, of course.
"Dad, what are we doing today?”
“Well, we'll be here for four days, so we can visit a different park every day. Maria and I thought it would be best to visit MGM Studios today, you don't necessarily need a whole day for that. We have to get used to it a little first anyway.”
I briefly searched my memory, which I had already thoroughly stuffed with all kinds of data and information about our destination at home. Keywords like StarTours and Tower of Terror came to mind. Well, today would show how brave my little brother really was.
As expected, there was no big discussion, and now that everyone had been fed, we went back to our suite. There, Reinhardt showed us various things he had found on the room table. These included Disney passes, maps, advertising brochures, as well as papers and keys to a rental car. We got all the video and photo equipment ready for use, then it was time to finally set off for our actual destination, so we walked back downstairs, and shortly afterwards we were sitting in a Disney-owned bus that was supposed to take us to the MGM Studios. The ride went over partly six-lane roads, the traffic was brisk but not too dense.
When we arrived at the park entrance, we stocked up on information material and decided on a meeting point in case we got lost in the crowd. The hordes of people were still relatively manageable, but that would probably change during the course of the day. Not for the better, mind you. The technology was divided up, Reinhardt took the video camera, Mom got our 35mm camera and I received the digital camera. There was nothing left for Tim, and that didn't seem quite fair to me.
“Hey Tim, do you want to take the digital camera? It's yours, after all.”
“Nah, I'll pass. I'm not that into photography.”
"Okay, if you say so.”
We decided to work our way through the park in a clockwise direction, which brought us first to the “Indiana Jones Epic Stunt Spectacular!” We were really lucky, the show had just started and we found a good place in the middle of the stands. These filled up quite quickly; if we had come ten minutes later, we would have had to wait for the next show. Shortly after the hall was filled to capacity, a “moderator” appeared and welcomed the guests, then went in search of a few volunteers to participate as “backup stuntmen”. I briefly considered volunteering, but then decided against it (afterwards I was very glad I did). Five spectators were picked out and “taken away” to be prepared for their roles. Then the big spectacle began in several scenes. Among other things, the giant boulder from “Indiana Jones and the Temple of Doom” (if I remember that right) was used, then there was a wild car chase and a foot chase, a brawl and a shootout, and the famous scene with the airplane rolling wildly through the area was not missing either. All that accompanied by music, bangs and pyrotechnics (all extremely loud!), plus some blazing flames. The volunteers also had their appearance, and now I'll stop telling this story, after all I don't want to spoil all the excitement for future Florida tourists null
The show was really spectacular, and at the end of it we left the arena – stunned by the action and the volume. Next stop was “Star Tours,” a ride that I can highly recommend to all Star Wars fans. Outside the entrance, a crashed X-wing fighter lies around, and a giant walker shoots water from its “laser” cannons – accompanied by the typical Star Wars sounds.
Inside, we experienced a fast-paced chase through space, including free-roaming asteroids and attacking villains. The sound, light and motion effects made it all seem incredibly realistic – something I simply wouldn't have thought possible before. Okay, I had heard about how great it was supposed to be, but I had always dismissed it as an exaggeration. It's really not! I knew already at that moment that the next four days would be the most exciting days of my life so far.
Once we had returned to our space and time continuum, we decided to split up. Mom and Reinhardt wanted to take it easy, but Tim and I couldn't get to the next attraction fast enough.
"Guys, we'll meet at the Christmas tree at five o'clock, okay?”
This decorated fellow, by the way, is worth a special mention. Christmas “tree” is probably not the right term, because surely no real tree can grow with such geometric precision. It was hung with baubles, garlands and other frippery to the point of no return, and was a living (or rather, non-living) example of American exaggeration. Everything has to be a little bigger, more colorful, more extravagant than anywhere else in the world. You just have to love the Yanks for it. But back to the actual event. After my mother had decided on the meeting point, Reinhardt now took out his wallet and handed Tim and me $50 each.
"Here, but that doesn't mean you have to spend it all in the next few hours.”
Hm, I had seen a few things in the Star Wars shop that I would have liked to have bought – but they would have gone over both the budget and the baggage allowance for the return flight.
"Right, off you go, you're hardly going to be able to be kept back anyway. Make sure you don't lose sight of each other. And Tim: you stick with Danny, right? Do what he tells you. Have fun you two.”
I wasn't so sure whether I liked this role as a big brother. Sure, it was fun to take care of the “little one” – on the other hand, I didn't want him to see me only as an “authority figure”. Well, if necessary, I would clarify that with him when the time came.
Mom wished us a pleasant time as well, and then we were finally able to leave. I really liked the two “oldies,” but I preferred to explore Disney World with someone my own age. Tim seemed to feel the same way, because he couldn't get enough distance between us and the old folks either.
“Phew, finally alone! I thought they'd never leave us in peace.“
Yup, Tim felt the same way I did!
”Well then, what's our next destination?”
We took a look at the map together, then a look at the terrain, and we were on our way to the Muppet Show – or, to be precise, to “Jim Henson's Muppet Vision 3-D”. As the name suggests, this is a three-dimensional adaptation of the famous puppet show. At the entrance, appropriate glasses were distributed, the waiting time until the next show was shortened by appearances of various Muppets on video monitors, and a few minutes later we were sitting in a real theater. The show that began was ... simply breathtaking! It's a very strange feeling when suddenly a car rushes out of the screen towards you. I jumped in my seat and was about to cower down. Not a good idea, because Tim next to me had similar thoughts, so we bumped heads.
“Ouch!”
“Likewise!”
Now, of course, some will say: They knew what was coming. 3-D says it all. Right! But just think of it when you are carried away by the action! By the way, we weren't the only ones who reacted like that. Fortunately, the collision wasn't particularly violent; the shock was greater than the pain, so we were able to continue enjoying the show. We winced (like everyone else in the theater) a few more times, but we were able to avoid further physical collisions.
By the way, knowledge of the English language is very helpful. You don't need it for the rides, but the shows are only really fun if you understand what is being said. Tim and I had no problems with our school English – we understood not only the played but also the spoken jokes.
And another thing: whether language, music or special effects – everything is extremely loud. Thomas may be used to that from his sisters arguing – but it totally freaked me out at first. You get used to it over time, but subsequent damage cannot be ruled out. (Which can be quite pleasant if you no longer hear your significant other snoring. Which, however, requires having one, which brings us back to the tiresome topic of lonely Danny.)
Tim and I decided after the Muppets Show, in any case, to insert a short break to recharge the spent energies. Because the Disney people came to the completely correct conclusion that starving guests do not represent good advertising, we did not need to search long until we ran across a hot dog stand. We treated ourselves to a hot dog and a bottle of Sprite each and then looked for a shady spot to consume the dearly bought food (2 dollars 50 for a 0.5 bottle of Sprite – phew). By the way, you can purchase a very useful accessory for the bottles – a carrying strap that allows you to hang the bottles around your neck. This leaves your hands free, and you always need free hands at Disney.
As I said, we sat down on a strategically well-placed bench and first devoted ourselves to the hot dogs. After our spirits had been refreshed in this way, we leaned back comfortably and watched the colorful hustle and bustle for a while. Meanwhile, huge crowds were on the move, and since “people watching” was one of my favorite pastimes anyway, I really enjoyed it. I mean, the more people, the greater the chances of a few really nice sights null
Tim watched me watching the people for a while, then it got boring for him.
“Well, anyone you're interested in?“
I grinned at him.
”I've already seen a few that I wouldn't mind.“
”You're a dirty mind. And you're supposed to be a role model for me. Tell me, what type of guy do you like best?”
“Hm, let me think hard. Blond, slim, athletic – but not a bodybuilder, more in the direction of a footballer or swimmer – intelligent, funny, about my age.”
There was, of course, a much shorter answer, but I couldn't bring myself to say, “Just look in a mirror.” To be honest, I didn't have much hope left for Tim in this matter. Don't ask me why, it was just a feeling.
“Don't fall for an American here, or are you looking for a holiday romance?“
”Nah, I want something long-term. With the guy I fall in love with, I want to share not only my bed but also my life. That may sound old-fashioned now, but that's just the way I am.”
“Don't worry, that doesn't sound old-fashioned, it sounds romantic. I couldn't imagine a purely sexual relationship either. Although at the moment I can't really imagine a relationship at all.“ ‘Say, why are we whispering, no one understands us here anyway?’
”I wouldn't be so sure about that if I were you.”
Our subsequent flinching was about as intense as the first moment of shock in a 3-D movie. There you are, sitting on a bench far from home at Disney World, and suddenly you're addressed in your native tongue! Japanese wouldn't have surprised me as much; we had already come across a few people with the matching facial features and the inevitable cameras in front of their eyes, but German? And on the neighboring bench, of all places?
After we had recovered somewhat from our shock, we looked in the direction from which the familiar sounds had come. On the bench next to us sat a couple (a heterosexual couple :-), maybe two or three years older than us. Both grinned happily at us and at the same time a little guiltily.
“Excuse me, guys, we really didn't mean to scare you. Bernd can be a little impulsive sometimes.“
”Hey, I just couldn't let that pass me by. By the way, this is Sandra. You already know my name.“
”Ha... hi. I'm Danny, and the guy next to me is Tim."
How long had they been listening to us?
“Nice to meet you. Are you here alone?“