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Part 1
Tobias
Heavily laden, I climbed down from the footboard. They didn't even have a decent platform. It really seemed to be the last backwater. Hohengrinde, what a funny name. I could see a small castle on a hill on the outskirts of the town, but couldn't see anything else. Three other boys got off the train with me, just as laden as I was.
How could I let myself in for this stupid idea of my parents? I should have just stayed at home and been bored to death there than to shovel this crap. ‘Holidays at the riding stables’ with active support, there was a nice affordable holiday.
They were just looking for cheap labour, nothing more. Just like the other boys, I looked around helplessly. I was told that I would be picked up from the train station. So I walked to the station building, or whatever else you could call this dilapidated shed.
A somewhat musty smell hit me, which was no wonder given the temperatures. My clothes were sticking to me anyway, and I wanted nothing more than a shower. By now I had crossed the hall of the building and came to the exit.
Behind me I heard a noise and realised that the other guys had just followed me. I stepped back outside and enjoyed the air that hit me. It was humid, but still better than inside.
A little annoyed, I put my backpack and the large bag on the ground. Again, there was no one to be seen who looked like a pick-up crew. In the meantime, the three others had also arrived.
‘Riding stables too?‘ the tall lanky guy asked.
I nodded.
‘I'm Benjamin,’ he said, holding out his hand.
‘Tobias,’ I said, shaking his hand.
I looked at the other two and realised that they were twins, and seemed to be about seventeen, like me.
‘Peter and Tim,‘ said one of the twins.
‘And who is Peter, who is Tim?’ asked Benjamin.
One of them grinned.
‘I'm Tim.’
‘So you must be Peter?’ Benjamin continued.
‘Yep!’
Well, if they didn't wear matching clothes, you could at least tell them apart! Well, Tim grinned all the time, while Peter kept a straight face.
‘Shouldn't we be picked up?‘ Peter asked.
‘In any case, the registration form said something about a transfer to the equestrian centre,’ Benjamin said.
‘Transfer...‘ I repeated and started giggling.
‘What is it?’ Tim wanted to know.
‘This word doesn't go with this place. Does it look like a shuttle bus is going to pull up here any minute and pick us up?’
All three shook their heads. I heard a neighing sound from somewhere and turned around. I couldn't believe my eyes – a carriage was actually coming. Well, driving – the guy was really picking up speed, the horses were practically galloping. But they were beautiful horses.
‘He's not going to pick us up, is he?‘ said Tim.
‘I think so, it's pretty close to the riding school,’ I said.
The closer it got, the more the carriage slowed down until it finally came to a stop right in front of us.
‘Whoa... Tristan. Sorry guys, the pickup gave up the ghost and I had to hitch the carriage first.’
Tristan? A horse that was an opera fan? The only thing missing was that the horse next to it was called Isolde. The guy jumped off the carriage and circled the animals.
‘Hello, I'm Georg, son of the owner of the Hellmann riding school,‘ he said, holding out his hand.
‘Tim.’ ‘Peter.’ ‘Benjamin.’ ‘Tobias.’
One after the other, we had shaken his hand.
‘Tobias... you have an allergy... I think,‘ Georg said.
Oh man, did that have to be brought up now? The other three looked at me and I couldn't stop myself from blushing.
‘Yes... a mild form of atopic dermatitis. But I have everything with me.’
‘Is that bad?’ Peter asked.
‘What?’
‘The atopic thingy?’
‘No, when it itches, I just scratch it until it bleeds,’ I said dryly.
George looked at me strangely.
‘Right, then take your bags and we'll tie them on the back.’
We followed him with the luggage to the back of the carriage, where there was a small hollow. One by one, we put our bags on it.
‘You can take your backpacks with you to the front,‘ said Georg and lashed our luggage down.
So we went back to the front.
‘Shall I help the lady in?’ Tim asked his brother, grinning and holding out his hand.
‘Ass!’ Peter just commented and got in without help.
The three of us got in as well and dropped onto the padded benches. I had never sat in a carriage before, let alone driven one. Georg took the reins.
‘Giddyup, Tristan, it's time to go home!’
A jerk and the coach started moving. But not as fast as before. Somehow I felt stupid. People walking on the street stared at us. Couldn't the guy go faster?
‘This is really >romantic<,’ said Tim and started giggling again.
He seemed to be the joker in the family. In fact, the twins were very different from one another. While Tim sat there, legs apart, rather macho, cracking one joke after another, Peter was probably the quieter of the two, had crossed his legs and was looking around.
‘You would be the last, the rest were brought by car,‘ Georg began to talk on the coach box without turning around, “would you four share a room?’
We all looked at each other and quickly agreed.
‘No problem,” Tim volunteered.
‘How many more have come?’ Benjamin asked.
‘With you, there are eight boys and eight girls, all the same age,‘ Georg answered.
Girls? That could be fun, I wasn't at all into women.
‘Hey, that'll be interesting,’ Benjamin said and laughed dirty.
Tim laughed back at him, while Peter continued to look around uninterested. Slowly the houses became fewer and we left the village. Great – now we're completely cut off from civilisation.
‘Can you all ride?‘ Georg asked.
‘Yes, I've had riding lessons and so has my brother,’ Tim said.
‘Benjamin?’
‘Yes, I've ridden from time to time.’
‘And Tobias?’ Georg asked, turning around briefly to take a look at me.
‘My parents work with horses, so I can ride too.’
I didn't want to boast about my father being a vet, and certainly not about him having a large practice, and I preferred not to mention the estate either.
‘To give you an idea of how you can imagine your stay here, I'll just tell you a little about it,’ Georg continued from the coach box at the front.
‘We get up at seven in the morning and then it's straight off to the stables!’
Hang on, no one said anything about getting up early, man, I was on holiday. And since when does an animal get food before a human? My mood was at rock bottom, I couldn't see the positive side of any of this.
‘So, muck out the stables and then take care of the horses. Then it's off to breakfast and after that the riding lessons start. We'll have lunch together again, and you'll have the afternoon and evening off.’
At least something. Georg slowed down even more and turned into a dirt road. The carriage started to shake and I was glad that the benches we were sitting on were padded.
In the distance, between tall poplars, we could see houses. This place really was in the middle of nowhere, and for three weeks! Somehow it would be okay and besides, I wasn't alone.
The riding centre came closer and soon the first horses could be seen in the paddocks. I loved horses, they were such majestic creatures, powerful and loyal. Georg drove through a wooden gate before braking.
He jumped down and closed the gate. Then he got back on and we rolled on to the buildings. There were a few vehicles with people standing behind them. Apparently these were the ones Georg thought had been brought here.
I could also see a group of teenagers standing by a gate with horses. Georg brought the carriage to a halt.
‘Mum, here are the last four from the station,‘ Georg called to a woman who turned to us.
‘Good, then I'll ask everyone to come here,’ she said in a strong voice, ‘Georg, would you please get your father, he's in the stable.’
Georg jumped off the carriage and disappeared into the stable. The rest of the parents and teenagers now gathered in front of her.
‘Well, I would like to welcome everyone once again and hope that you will all have a great time here during the three weeks. For those who don't know me, my name is Corinna Hellmann. You have already met Georg, our son. My husband and I have been running this riding centre for ten years and our daughter Steffi also helps us.’
A man stepped up next to Georg beside Corinna.
‘The rooms have already been allocated... well, then it's time to say goodbye and move into our rooms afterwards.’
A wild confusion arose at the cars while Georg helped us unload our luggage.
‘Come on, I'll show you to your rooms in a moment. It'll take a while before they're ready anyway,’ said Georg, leading the way.
I pushed my way through the crowd to follow Georg, which was not easy with the luggage. Georg opened the door of the large house and let us all in.
‘Over there is our lounge, that's where we eat!‘ Georg explained before stomping up the stairs.
The narrow staircase wasn't designed for a lot of luggage either, so I almost tripped over every other step, and as if that wasn't enough, there was another floor to go up.
‘Well, since you're the first, you get the best room,’ Georg said, opening a door.
We entered a large room, half of which was separated by a wall. There were two beds on either side of the wall, and in front of them stood a table with four chairs. I could also make out two cupboards on either side.
‘Behind the door is your bathroom and out front is the balcony. Then get settled, we'll all meet downstairs in the lounge around six. Bed linen is on the bed, so see you later.’
And he was gone and we were still standing there with our luggage.
‘Are we sleeping together?‘ Tim Benjamin asked.
‘Well, that settles the bed question,’ Benjamin nodded and walked with Tim to the right side of the room.
‘Then I guess you'll have to make do with me,’ I said to Peter, who smiled at me sheepishly.
Peter
I put my bag on the bed, Tobias put his suitcase on the bed. Laughter was heard next door and when I looked around the wall, I got a pillow in the face.
Tim and Benjamin were lying on the bed and throwing pillows at each other. I retreated back to our side, where Tobias was already unpacking his suitcase. Somehow I was still annoyed.
Angry at my brother and my parents. I put my suitcase on my side of the bed and opened it. I would have liked to close it again and travel back. But my parents said that my little brother needed supervision.
Well, I was only four minutes old, but I was also the more sensible one. Last year, we only had trouble with Tim. Several times, my mother had been summoned to the school, or my father to the neighbours.
I was sure that the neighbours had a landslide of debris on their minds when they learned that Tim would not be at home for three weeks. I took my clothes out of the suitcase and put them on the shelf that was on my side.
Tobias did the same, well you couldn't call it laying, he really threw them on the shelf.
‘Is something wrong?‘ I asked quietly.
‘Oh... never mind. I just didn't want to come here...’ he replied and threw a pair of trainers on the floor.
‘That makes two of us!‘ I replied.
‘Why?’
‘I had to come along as my brother's minder.’
Tobias began scratching his arm.
‘Does it itch?’ I asked.
‘Yes... I actually wanted to take a shower. It's all stuck to me anyway.’
‘Good idea, but I'll let you go first, you seem to need it more.’
Tobias rolled his eyes and nodded. I walked around the corner where Benjamin and Tim were still busy with the pillows.
‘Tim, could you please unpack your suitcase?’
‘Hey man, you're not the boss of me,’ Tim replied.
‘I asked you, okay?’
I could really smack him in the face every now and then, always such a big mouth. But there was nothing behind it. Once the anger was there, it was as small as a dwarf. Tobias seemed to be ready for the shower already. He walked past me with a towel over his shoulder and shampoo in his hand, wearing only shorts.
‘I'll hurry, so you can do the same,’ he said and locked the bathroom door behind him.
So I took a towel off the shelf and looked for the toilet bag in my suitcase that Mum had bought me especially for these three weeks. I just thought it was stuffy. I pulled out the shampoo and threw the toilet bag back in the suitcase.
Benjamin and Tim still didn't seem to prefer unpacking their suitcases and ran past me out of our room. I watched them go as they dashed down the stairs and shook my head.
I had closed the door, because I didn't feel like undressing in front of the open door where anyone could see me. I heard the water rushing in the bathroom. I sat down on the bed and put on my laces.
A foul smell came from the shoes, no wonder, I had been wearing them for hours and with the heat... I stepped in stockings to the glass door and opened it. A beautiful balcony appeared.
I stepped out and enjoyed the view before I put my trainers down to air.
‘Hey, that's cool!’
I was startled and turned around. Tobias seemed to have finished showering. With dripping wet hair, he stood next to me, only with a towel around his hips. I didn't know why, but I couldn't take my eyes off him.
Tobi was tanned and in top shape. I admired the muscles.
‘That's a really hot view,’ Tobi said, which I could only confirm with a nod.
What am I doing here, staring at Tobi and thinking he's hot? Am I stupid or what? My gaze shot up abruptly and I looked in the same direction as Tobi. Voices were heard downstairs. Tobi and I took a step forward and went to see what was going on.
There were a few girls standing there chatting. When one of them looked up by chance and the others suddenly looked up too, they started to giggle loudly.
‘It seems you have your first fan club here, Tobi,’ I said and grinned.
‘Bah, chicken people, they should leave me alone... oh, Tobi can keep saying it, that's what everyone at home calls me too.’
‘At home? Where do you come from?’
‘Reutlingen.’
‘Oh really, we're from Stuttgart, so we don't even live far from each other.’
‘That's right... and then we meet here in the north.’
‘My parents chose it, not me,‘ I said and entered the room again.
Tobi followed me and closed the balcony door.
‘Yeah, I'll go take a shower then,’ I said and started to pull my sticky shirt over my head.
Tobi nodded and picked out some fresh clothes from the shelf. I threw my baggy over the chair and now disappeared under the shower too. I was surprised that the bathroom was so spacious; from outside, everything looked so small.
Two people could easily fit in the shower cubicle and there were also two washbasins. I hung up my towel and sat down briefly on the toilet. The door opened and Tobi poked his head in.
‘Sorry, I forgot my boxers.’
He reached for her, who was lying on a stool, and was gone again. Shit, I had to get used to locking the door. I felt really stupid, squatting on the toilet, and Tobi could see me like that.
I pressed the flush and then turned on the water. It was a relief. I just stood there and let the water run over my body. My thoughts turned back to Tobi, how he had just been standing on the balcony next to me.
That smooth skin, the well-formed chest and the six-pack. I flinched, frightened by myself. What the hell was I doing, I was even more frightened by my cock, which was pointing straight up.
What was wrong with me? Confused, I leaned against the wall, closed my eyes and tried to push these thoughts out of my mind. Did I have to fall for my roommate of all people right now?
I grabbed the shampoo, put some on my hand and began to rub it into my hair. I rinsed the foam out and soaped the rest of my body. My cock hadn't gone down at all.
What was I going to do now? It wasn't going to go away anytime soon... but jerking off in here? What if Tobi stormed into the bathroom again? Meanwhile, I was aroused by my soaping myself.
My head switched off and I jerked off. I was overripe, because I came quite fast and powerfully. I bit my lips together so that I didn't make a sound. Panting heavily, I leaned against the wall.
Out of the corner of my eye, I saw the thick blobs of my semen running down the shower wall. I had never come so powerfully before... I began to doubt myself.
I quickly sprayed everything to destroy my telltale traces. Then I turned off the water. My cock returned to its normal shape and my doubts returned.
Tobias
I was at my wits' end. My back was itching and I couldn't reach it. I stood at the door frame and rubbed my back against it. Ah, that felt good. I was annoyed with myself.
My mum was right. This morning she said that I should rub myself well, because today it would be hot and I would sweat a lot, especially in the train. I didn't want to listen to her and ended up walking around like a shiny bacon rind again.
And now I had the mess. My back itched and various other parts of my body. Annoyed with myself, I went to the suitcase and took out one of the tubes of cream that my mum had packed for me as a precaution.
I started rubbing it into the back of my knees when Peter came out of the bathroom again.
‘Hey, you're all red on your back,’ Peter said.
‘Yeah, it itches like hell... could you maybe put some cream on it?’
Peter hesitated briefly.
‘Yeah... sure, give it to me.’
I got up, handed him the tube and turned my back to him. It got cold for a moment, Peter had apparently squeezed the cream directly onto my back. I flinched a little.
‘Um... sorry,‘ Peter said behind me.
‘It's okay,’ I replied.
Peter began to spread the cream. I closed my eyes and enjoyed it. It felt good, he was doing a great job, and I let out a slight sigh. I felt Peter's hands slowly moving up and down my back.
My stomach began to tingle and a shiver ran through my body.
‘Better?’
‘Yes,’ I grumbled in a chubby voice.
The door was flung open and Tim and Benjamin stormed in. They looked briefly puzzled, because Peter and I still only had our towels wrapped around us.
‘I'll quickly rub Tobi's back with sun cream,‘ Peter said rather desperately.
‘He needs it, he's all red,’ said Benjamin, and he had already disappeared on his side of the room.
‘Will you be long?‘ Tim asked.
‘No, why?’ Peter asked.
‘There are a few hot chicks downstairs. We'll just take off our sweaty clothes and then we'll go back down,‘ explained Tim and also disappeared to his side.
I looked briefly at Peter, who stared at me and shook his head slightly. He seemed to have as little desire for this cackling as I did.
‘Go ahead, maybe we'll come,’ said Peter, still massaging the cream in.
‘Okay,‘ said Tim, freshly dressed, and ran out the door again, closely followed by Benjamin, also in a fresh outfit.
‘Close the door!’ Peter called, but the trampling was already moving away.
Peter went to the door and pushed it closed with his foot before turning back to me and stopping.
‘Now look at that,’ he said.
I ran to him and looked around the corner. It looked like the bomb had hit. The suitcases open and everything scattered wildly across the room.
‘I'm really glad that you sleep on my side,’ I said, and Peter smiled embarrassedly.
‘Wash your hands, so you don't accidentally get the stuff in your eyes.’
Peter nodded and disappeared back into the bathroom.
Georg
I dropped the door into the lock and ran to mum's estate car.
‘Where are you going?’ I heard my mum's voice.
‘You know, to pick up Alex, his train is arriving in a quarter of an hour.’
‘That's right, I'd forgotten – and what do you want with my car?’
‘My pickup won't start.’
‘That's why you took the coach? I was wondering.’
‘Yes, there was no other car available or parked by the guests... you should really expand our car park sometime.’
‘Oh honey, you know we want to, but we never find the time.’
I looked at my watch.
‘Mum, I have to go now, okay?’
‘Yes, but please drive slowly, you don't want to risk losing your new driving licence.’
I grinned and got in. I started the car and let it roll slowly. Some of our new arrivals were standing at the gate, talking animatedly. As I drove past, they all looked at me.
I nodded briefly and then drove out of the yard. I pressed on the gas and the station wagon pulled away with a rich sound. Soon I would see my sweetheart again.
Peter
I sat somewhat bored in the dining room and bit into my sausage sandwich. Tim was of course the centre of attention. He told one stupid joke after another. Of course, the whole bunch at his table laughed.
Disinterested, I looked out the window, where I saw a station wagon pull into the yard. The son of the family, Georg, got out. Another guy appeared on the passenger side. Another guest?
Mrs Hellmann also appeared in front of the house and hugged the strange boy, so it couldn't be a guest. Georg had a small bag slung over his shoulder and circled around to the car.
The three of them made small talk until the boy suddenly took Georg in his arms and kissed him. They're kissing... on the mouth... hello? Tobi was sitting opposite me, looked at my face briefly and then followed my gaze and now also had to see Georg and the boy kissing.
He turned back, looked at me briefly, before jerking his head again.
‘Are they two boys?’ Tobi asked me, confused, but so quietly that no one else could hear.
I nodded.
‘That's crazy!’
‘Tell me about it! One of them is Georg.’
‘The son of the lady here?’
The farm owner seemed to think the kiss had gone on too long, at any rate she tapped Georg on the shoulder, causing the two to pull apart. Now Tobi could definitely recognise Georg.
‘That's really awesome!’ came over his lips again.
The young man fell around Mrs Hellmann's neck and hugged her. They also seemed to have known each other for quite some time. There was general laughter at the table, but no one except me and Tobi saw this scene.
Georg and the boy walked arm in arm behind Mrs Hellmann into the house. It was a shame, as curious as I was, I would have liked to have seen more. I now put everything back on my tray and decided to just go outside.
‘You're ready already?’ Tobi asked.
‘Yes, I want to go outside... it's too noisy for me here at the moment.’
‘You're right, I'm annoyed by your brother's chatter too. Wait, I'll come with you!’ he said, and he also put his things on the tray and got up with me.
When we carried our trays to the kitchen, the others took little notice of us. Except for two girls who looked at us briefly and then giggled. Annoyed, I rolled my eyes.
‘These silly people, I hate it!’
‘I feel the same way,‘ said Tobi, and we left the dining room.
‘You go ahead, I still have to go to the bathroom,’ Tobi continued as he walked out.
I nodded and left the house. Loud laughter came from the Hellmanns‘ house. I walked across the yard to get closer to the house, but I couldn't see anything. Suddenly the door was flung open and Georg and the boy stormed out of the house.
‘No, but I missed Brown almost as much as I missed you!’ I heard the boy say.
‘I see... almost,’ Georg commented on the statement.
The boy stuck out his tongue at him. When they were at my height, there was a brief hello from both of them and then they had already disappeared into the stable. Should I go after them? Or was that too much curiosity?
Curiosity won out and I followed them. After all, we were free to move around here, so why not in the stables too? I stepped through the open door, but there was no sign of the two of them.
A horse in the first stall stuck its head out and I was startled. A guilty conscience? I stroked the bridge of its nose and pricked up my ears. I heard voices from quite a distance away.
I slowly approached.
‘You look good, brown horse! I missed you so much!’
I heard the horse whinny loudly.
‘I personally gave him his food every day. He hardly lets anyone else get close to him.’
That was Georg's voice.
‘Did you ride with him?’
‘No, Alexander, I just let him out into the paddock. He doesn't let anyone else get close to him.’
‘He just has good taste!‘ I heard this Alexander say and had to grin.
‘Thank God my darling isn't conceited,’ Georg said.
I quietly stepped a little further forward and was able to see the two of them hidden in a box. The horse that this Alexander was grooming looked a bit – well – worn out. It seemed to have been through a lot.
‘Do you feel like going for a ride?’
‘Sure,‘ I heard Georg say.
‘Oh, there you are, I've been looking all over for you,’ I heard a voice behind me and I turned around with a start.
Tobias had come to the stables. At the same moment, Georg and Alexander stuck their heads out of the box.
‘Oh... um, hello,‘ I said.
What a bummer... I would have liked to have hidden in the nearest mouse hole. While the two of them came out of the box, Tobi came from the other side. Horses are flight animals... right now I would have liked to have fled too.
‘I was just... looking around a bit,’ I stammered.
‘Fancy a ride?‘ I heard Alexander ask.
‘Alexander, they just arrived. I don't even know if they can ride,’ Georg said.
‘I can ride,’ Tobi said.
Tobi seemed to have less difficulty talking to the two of them than I did.
Tobias
What was he doing here in the stables? And why did he have such a bright red head? Georg and this Alexander were now standing right in front of us. Peter's unease must also have been noticeable to the two of them.
‘Have you had riding lessons?‘ Georg asked.
‘My father is a vet, we have horses at home ourselves.’
‘And you?’ Alexander turned to Peter.
‘I had riding lessons... with my brother,‘ Peter replied.
‘Twins. So don't be surprised if you see Peter here twice, his brother's name is Tim and this is Tobi,’ Georg said.
It was admirable that he could already remember our names.
‘So, how about going for a ride?’ Alexander asked again.
I didn't really dare to, but Peter pushed me forward.
‘Sure! It's still better than spending time with those drooling tubes in there.’
Georg grinned at Alexander.
Alexander went to a phone and dialled a number. A little later, he said that he and Alexander would take two holiday guests with them for a ride. Meanwhile, Alexander had finished saddling the brown horse and went to another box.
He took a blanket and put it over the back of the horse in the box.
‘Will you take Brighton?’ Alexander asked, and Georg grinned at him.
‘What should I do with the old lady... you know I only ride with Flex!’
I looked at the stall sign and could read Flex. Why did Alexander ask if he was going to saddle Flex anyway? He lifted the saddle and placed it on Flex's back. Alexander coughed slightly and Georg was already standing in the stall.
‘Are you all right, darling?’ Georg asked, concerned, and put his hand on Alexander's shoulder.
Peter grinned at me, because he had probably heard the word “darling” too.
‘It's not a seizure, the air in here seems pretty dry...’
‘Please have something to drink, okay?’
‘Georg..., I haven't had a seizure in a month. But it's nice of you to worry so much.’
‘Seizure?’ Peter asked.
‘Yes... I was also a holiday guest here... well, more of a patient because of my bad coughing fits.’
‘And did you get well here?‘ Peter asked.
‘I had good care... yes,’ Alexander grinned and looked at Georg.
‘And now you're a couple... right?‘ I asked
Horrified, Peter looked at me. Of course, he also had this question on the tip of his tongue, but he would never have dared to ask.
‘Yes... you can see that,’ Georg replied and left the box again.
‘And you two?‘ Alexander asked us after he had finished saddling the horse.
‘Er... what?’ I stuttered.
‘Are you together too?’
Peter's face turned as red as mine.
Peter
Damn, was it that obvious that I had a crush on Tobi? I had tried everything to appear as normal as possible.
‘Er...what makes you think that?‘ Tobi stammered on.
‘Well, as Georg told me, you two have been really adoring each other since you've been here,’ Alexander explained, leading Flex out of his box.
Tobi looked at me and I would have liked to have run out of the stable. But I was paralysed.
‘Don't act so surprised,‘ Georg exclaimed from a neighbouring stall.
Tobi raised his hand, pointed hesitantly at me and then at himself. My head bowed and I could only nod. In this situation, denial was futile. I didn't want to and couldn't.
‘Really?’ I heard Tobi say quietly.
Again I nodded without looking up.
‘Why... didn't you say anything?’
Hello... what is he thinking? I looked up angrily.
‘How do you think it happened? I get off the train, see you, walk up to you and say to you >Sorry, I just fell in love with you when I got off the train... I'm gay<?’
‘It could have been a possibility!’ Alexander said, walking past our box.
I heard Georg laughing. And Tobi's mouth also curved upwards slightly.
‘Oh, fuck all of you!’ I shouted angrily and ran out of the box, straight into Georg's arms.
I tried to get out of his grip, but Georg was simply stronger.
‘Stop, young man! Not like this... Sorry I laughed. The idea that someone would do... something like that was just too funny for me. I'm sorry that Alexander and I took you by surprise.’
I looked up and didn't say a word.
‘What do you mean by taking us by surprise... you just have to force these two to be happy,’ Alexander said.
‘Alexander... please.’
‘What?’ he asked, annoyed.
‘Three months ago, you also arrived here. May I remind you how you were then?’
‘All right already... I'll be quiet.’
I turned my head and looked at Tobi, who was standing a little way from me.
Tobias
He's in love with me... wow! I couldn't believe it. Was I in love with him too? Was I in love with a boy? Slowly, all the things that had happened that day that I couldn't explain came back to me.
‘Tobi?‘ Peter asked quietly.
‘Yes?’ I replied.
‘Well... um... what do you mean... oh man, this is hard.’
Alexander stood next to Peter and put his arm around him.
‘Calm down!’ he said, ’You surely want to ask what Tobi thinks about your confession, right?’
Peter nodded violently and blushed again.
Now I was the one who was embarrassed. What should I say? Peter looked at me and was surely waiting for an answer. Suddenly he turned away and ran out of the stable.
‘Peter!‘ I called after him, but he was already gone.
‘I think you should go to him,’ said Alexander.
‘We'll wait a little longer... in case you two come back,’ Georg said.
*-*-*
I looked around outside the stable but couldn't find Peter. There was a commotion at the front door of our guest house. The rest of the group was coming back from dinner.
‘Tobias?’ I heard Tim call.
I looked at him. He walked over to me.
‘What's going on with Peter?’
I just played dumb, because I didn't feel like talking to Tim right now.
‘Why?’
‘He just ran past us crying!’
Shit... what had I done? I shrugged. Tim leaned forward.
‘Listen... if you harm a hair on my brother's head... then you'll have to deal with me!‘ I heard quietly from his mouth.
Speechless, I pointed at myself and shook my head.
‘I may be a real mess, but I know my brother very well!’
What should I answer him?
‘He's in his room,’ Tim said and ran back to the others.
I watched him go before entering the house. I quickly reached our floor. Our door was only slightly ajar, so I entered quietly. A glance at our half of the room showed me that at least Peter was not in bed.
I closed the door behind me and entered our half. The balcony door was open. I slowly approached it and looked out. Peter was standing at the balustrade smoking.
‘You smoke?’
‘None of your business!’ I got a snappy answer.
‘Peter please... I think you've misunderstood something...’
‘How can you misunderstand a hesitation...’
He turned around and I could see into his eyes. He had been crying.
‘I was just hesitating...’
‘Because you're not gay...’
‘Now please let me finish!’ I snapped, and Peter took a slight step back.
‘Do you know what it's like to suddenly realise you're interested in a boy instead of a girl?’
Peter's expression lit up.
‘I've been wondering all day why I reacted to you the way I did.’
What a sentence structure.
‘...how did you react?’ Peter asked quietly.
‘I felt comfortable with you and yet you totally confused me. My stomach feels weird and I can't stop looking at you. When you put cream on me at lunchtime, stars danced in front of my face.’
Now Peter smiled.
‘Does that mean...’
‘Peter, I don't know what it means... I'm feeling it for the first time.’
‘That you're attracted to a boy?’
I nodded. Peter stubbed out his cigarette in an ashtray on the table and came over to me.
‘You're attracted to me?’ I heard Peter's soft voice.
His eyes sparkled and I couldn't stop staring at them. I nodded again. Peter put his arms around me and pulled me a little towards him.
‘Would that be such a bad idea?’
His face came closer to mine and I suddenly felt a soft kiss on my cheek. My heart accelerated to double its normal rhythm. Again I shook my head, unable to utter a sound.
Suddenly I felt Peter's lips on mine. They were so soft... so warm. Something inside me clicked and I broke out of my stupor. I slowly raised my arms and put them around Peter.
‘When you're done, will you come down?’ we heard someone call and moved apart.
We both looked over the balustrade down into the courtyard. There sat George and Alexander on horses, with two horses in tow. Both grinned at us. I looked at Peter and he nodded.
We ran down the stairs.
‘Peter, take this horse,’ came from George, handing him the reins.
*-*-*
I didn't know how long we had been riding, but I realised that I hadn't lost my touch. Although I had my own horse, my commitments prevented me from riding him more.
Sometimes I even thought that Star resented me for it. When I did have a moment to visit him, he would punish me by turning his back on me. A branch in my face startled me out of my thoughts.
‘Tobias, you have to look where you're going,’ I heard Georg call.
The trees thinned out and the beach came into view. It was good to know that you could safely go for a swim here at lunchtime. Alexander picked up speed, heading straight for the water.
Peter and I followed him. Peter looked elegant on his horse. Tim had said that they had already had a few riding lessons, but the way he sat on the horse – it was as if he had always done it.
‘Everything okay?’ Peter asked, noticing my gaze.
I nodded and tried to stay close to his horse. Georg and Alexander were now at the water. The water splashed quite high when the horses‘ hooves hit it.
Somehow it was beautiful. The fresh air here on the beach. The sun was already quite low. Peter was riding next to me and kept glancing over at me.
‘Tobi?’ he asked.
His horse slowed down again and I also went back to walking.
‘Yes?‘ I asked.
‘I somehow feel guilty now,’ he said.
‘Why?’
‘Because I more or less took you by surprise.’
Somehow I was now at a loss.
‘Huh?’
‘If Alexander hadn't been so forward, everything would still be normal...’
‘What do you mean by normal? I don't understand what you mean at all right now.’
Peter took a deep breath.
‘Two years ago, I told my family that I felt more for boys than for girls.’
‘Yes, and?’
‘They didn't take me seriously. My mum said it was just a phase and I shouldn't worry, and my dad agreed with her.’
‘And Tim?’
‘He just teased me about it, made fun of everything.’
‘And what about now?’
‘They seem to have realised that the phase seems to be lasting. They don't talk about it, but I can tell that I'm being watched more closely in everything.’
‘That's good... or - I mean... you're not fighting with them... about that.’
Alexander and Georg had left the water and stopped at a large tree stump. Peter and I now headed for this stump as well.
‘No, I haven't, but it's still not the same as it used to be. My dad doesn't hug me anymore, no more long talks with my mom...’
‘And what about Tim?’
‘He still makes fun of me, constantly putting me in embarrassing situations.’
What should I say to that? In the meantime, we had reached the other two. Like them, we dismounted and tied our horses to the stump. George had sat down in the sand and was looking out to sea.
Alexander stroked his horse on the head. Peter looked at me briefly and so we sat down with George.
‘Can I ask you something?’ Peter asked George.
Peter
‘Yes, sure!’ Georg said to me.
Alexander now joined us too and leaned against Georg.
‘How did your parents take it... when you told them you were into boys...?’
Georg exhaled.
‘Phew..., tough question... what was it again?’
I noticed that his face was turning red.
‘Shall I tell it?‘ Alexander asked, amused.
Georg nudged his friend in the side.
‘Did you have something to do with it?’ Tobi asked Alexander.
‘No, that was before my time, but I already know the story.’
‘Okay, do you want the long version or the short version?‘ Georg asked.
‘The short version... please, darling,’ Alexander said.
‘All right... so that my darling isn't bored... the short version. My father caught me in the straw with another boy – that was that and they've known ever since.’
Alexander giggled.
‘Was there trouble?‘ I asked.
‘No, why?’
‘Well, I don't know, did your father just accept it?’
‘He didn't have much choice,’ Alexander said, giggling.
Georg poked his friend again.
‘Alexander, maybe you don't realise it, but not everyone has it as easy as you do when they come out!‘ Georg said.
‘It's all right,’ he said, sitting up.
‘Are you having difficulties?‘ he now asked me.
I briefly recounted what I had told Tobi earlier.
‘You should maybe talk to them,’ Alexander suggested.
‘I don't really dare.’
‘Why... they already know,‘ Georg said.
‘I'm still afraid because we never talked about this topic again.’
‘But you should, otherwise nothing will change!’ Alexander said.
‘And what did you mean by ‘take them by surprise’ earlier?’ Tobi said.
‘Oh, I don't know. I see what's going on at my house and thought about how you would fare if you said that at home...’
‘Peter, you're just worrying too much. Now just enjoy being together,’ said Georg.
‘And I haven't even thought about it,‘ came from Tobi, “my parents have very little time due to their large practice, I don't even know if they would react to this message at all.’
I sighed and looked out to sea.
‘And you're here on a visit now... on holiday?” Tobi asked Alexander.
‘Yes and no,’ he replied.
Tobi and I looked at him questioningly.
‘At the moment I'm still visiting, but I'm not on holiday. My parents are moving here in about two weeks.’
‘Where do you live?’ I asked.
He told us a place in southern Germany that I didn't know, but that didn't matter.
‘And now you're moving here so you're closer to Georg?’
‘No, definitely not. My father got a great job here. Well, maybe it's also for my health, the climate here is good for me.’
‘Oh, you said something about coughing fits,‘ I said.
‘Fits is good, he even passed out in front of me once. I almost died of fear,’ Georg said.
‘Now don't exaggerate,’ Alexander said.
‘Don't believe him. You should have seen him when he arrived here. Pale, emaciated, sick,’ Georg said, grinning.
‘I can't have looked that bad, otherwise you wouldn't have fallen in love with me.’
Now both of them laughed and I felt Tobi leaning against me. I just put my arm around him and let my hand rest on his leg.
‘And how do you imagine it? So, how do you two want to proceed?‘ Alexander suddenly asked.
‘Um... I haven't thought about that either,’ Tobi replied.
‘Me neither.’
‘Should we keep quiet?‘ Georg asked.
‘Well... for now, yes,’ I said, looking uncertainly at Tobi.
But he just nodded.
‘Okay. Your wish is our command,‘ said Alexander.
‘And if there are any problems, you know where to find us!’ Georg said.
‘Thanks!’ Tobi and I said at the same time.
Tobias
Georg had reminded us to leave, since we had to get up early the next morning. So we had ridden back the same way. Peter and I helped as best we could to take care of the horses in the stable.
A little exhausted and tired, we arrived in our room. There was no sign of the others, far and wide. Peter opened the door and I followed him.
‘Where did you come from?’ I heard Tim ask.
‘We went for a ride,‘ Peter answered the question, while I closed the door behind us.
Benjamin and Tim were lying on their beds, the rest of their room looked war-torn. Everything was thrown into confusion.
‘Riding out...really? How come?’ Benjamin asked.
‘Georg asked us if we wanted to come with us,’ I replied.
I couldn't help noticing that Tim's eyes kept wandering back and forth between me and Peter.
‘And why are you already in your rooms?‘ Peter asked.
‘We finished at 10:00. Ms Hellmann sent us to our rooms.’
I looked at the clock and saw that it was almost half past ten.
‘Okay, then we'll hit the hay too,’ Peter said.
I said good night obediently and followed him to our side. We quickly took off our clothes.
‘Do you want me to rub cream on your back again?‘ Peter asked me quietly.
I had my back turned to him and apparently my back was red again.
‘Yes... that would be nice of you,’ I replied just as quietly.
‘But I'm going to the bathroom first,’ he said.
‘I have to go too.’
A little later I was lying on the bed, wearing only shorts. Peter had grabbed the cream and sat down next to me. I felt a sudden cold on one spot of my back, but it went away as soon as Peter began to spread the cream.
I fell into a dream again and enjoyed Peter's hands on my back. Someone else seemed to like it too. I felt something stirring in my shorts.
‘I'm going to quickly wash my hands,’ said Peter, and he was gone.
I heard Benjamin and Tim laughing next door, but I didn't understand what they were talking about. That way I could be sure that they didn't understand us either. The bathroom door opened and Peter came back.
He was now also only wearing one pair of shorts and crawled into bed next to me. I slowly crawled under the covers as well. Peter looked at me.
‘What?’ I said quietly.
He lifted his blanket and grinned.
‘Um... I've never,‘ I stuttered.
‘Silly... I just wanted to know if you wanted to snuggle up to me.’
I blushed bright red and Peter started giggling.
‘Sorry,’ I said.
So I slowly moved over to him and snuggled up to him.
‘Hey, you don't have to apologise… I would never do anything without asking you,‘ Peter whispered in my ear.
‘Thanks,’ I said and Peter turned off the light.
‘It would be better if you also slowly went to sleep,’ Peter shouted loudly, “tomorrow at seven we have to be down at the stables.’
‘Shit, right,” I heard Tim say and quickly the light was off.
‘Good night,‘ called Benjamin.
‘Good night,’ Peter and I replied simultaneously.
*-*-*
Peter
A ringing of the alarm clock woke me up, but I couldn't turn it off. Something heavy was lying on my arm. I turned my head and looked into the sleepy eyes of Tobi.
‘Can you turn off the damn alarm clock?‘ I heard my brother call.
But before I could react, Tim had already come around the corner and was about to get the loud culprit by the throat. He paused briefly, reached for the alarm clock and turned it off.
‘Sorry,’ Tim said and disappeared again.
‘What was that now?’ I asked.
‘What do you mean?‘ Tobias grumbled.
‘It's not my brother's way to leave something unseen uncommented.’
‘Never mind!’ Tobias said, spreading himself on my chest, ‘do we have to get up?’
‘Yes... we're supposed to be at the stables in half an hour,’ I replied, enjoying Tobi's weight on me.
He raised his head and looked at the alarm clock.
‘Damn... I could stay like this forever,’ he said and sat up.
The blanket slid down, revealing Tobi's chest. His six-pack reappeared, which I had already admired yesterday. He stretched his arms up and stretched.
My eyes enjoyed watching this display of muscles.
‘Peeping Tom,’ Tobi pulled me out of my thoughts.
He leaned forward briefly, gave me a little kiss on the mouth and stood up. Shortly thereafter, he had disappeared into the bathroom. With a heavy heart, I also struggled out of bed. I went to my shelf and took out the clothes I wanted to wear later.
A little later, Tobi came out of the bathroom again.
‘You can,‘ he said with a gorgeous smile.
‘Thanks,’ I said, ‘your back?’
‘It's okay, I still have enough from last night!’
‘Are you sure? It looks as red as it was last night.’
Tobi took a deep breath and looked annoyed.
‘At home, my mother always makes sure that I'm always well protected with sunscreen... I guess you'll have to take over that part now...’
I paused.
‘Are you mad at me?’ I asked, feeling insecure.
‘No, definitely not. If I'm not careful, I'll scratch my skin open again. My mother's biggest concern was probably that I didn't apply enough cream here, which is probably why the Hellmanns know about my allergy, so they can take care of it.’
I breathed a sigh of relief.
‘If you don't mind, I'll be happy to remind you,’ I said.
Tobi smiled. I grabbed the tube from my bedside table and went to Tobi. He turned his back to me and I creamed him. Behind me, I heard someone disappear in the bathroom.
‘It looks pretty gross,’ I suddenly heard Benjamin behind me.
I turned my head and saw him leaning against the wall. He, too, was standing only in shorts, like us. Benjamin was quite thin and his height emphasised that even more. You could literally count his ribs.
‘Why? It's been worse; I used to scratch myself regularly,’ Tobi said.
‘Does it hurt?‘ Benjamin asked while I was finally finished and closed the tube.
‘No, it just starts to itch a lot without the cream.’
‘Does it go away?’
‘I don't know. Peter, you should wash your hands,’ said Tobi.
‘Can't. Tim is in the bathroom.’
‘Then don't touch your face or eyes, it can burn like hell.’
The door opened and Tim came out of the bathroom. He looked at us both strangely and then quickly disappeared into his room.
‘You go first,‘ Benjamin said, pointing to the bathroom.
‘Thanks,’ I said and disappeared into the bathroom.
*-*-*
Tobias
I had already gone ahead. Most of the others had already gathered in front of the stable when Frau Hellmann arrived.
‘It seems that some of you had a short night,’ she said, ’good morning everyone.’
The ‘good morning’ of those standing around was drowned out by the girls‘ giggling. Now Benjamin and Peter came running out of the house as well. They joined us. Tim stood a little apart and seemed absent-minded to me.
‘So, I'll now assign you each a school horse. I'll tell you the names of the horses, which you can then look for yourselves using the stall signs,’ Frau Hellmann began.
‘I heard that Peter and Tobias have already been assigned a horse. You can go in, Georg and Alexander are already in the stable.’
All eyes turned to us. Tim seemed to have already introduced us to the others, even though we hadn't been near them except at dinner. Slightly embarrassed, we pushed our way through the crowd and entered the stable.
As on the previous evening, Georg and Alexander were in the boxes with their horses. And both were already in full swing. I smiled, as did Peter next to me. The two were standing in the stable aisle, hugging and kissing closely.
Apparently the two hadn't heard us, so I cleared my throat. Both of them were startled.
‘Oh, you're already here?‘ Georg asked, pulling up his shirt.
‘Yes. And the others are still in front of the stables. Your mother said we've already been assigned horses,’ Peter said.
‘The horses you had last night. I had the feeling you got along well with them,’ Alexander explained.
We walked over to the boxes from which they had taken our horses yesterday. Gahna was standing next to my horse.
‘She's a golden chestnut mare, a Holsteiner, and very sweet,‘ said George.
‘I've got a Holsteiner too,’ said Peter.
‘Yes, he's our lovable rascal, Jacco. But after you rode so well with him yesterday, I think you can handle him,‘ Georg explained further.
Jacco raised his head when he heard his name. Alexander opened the stall to Gahna and entered.
‘Morning... well, hello there,’ I heard him say and saw him gently stroking her on the head.
I carefully stepped behind him.
‘So, here are the cleaning supplies – it's time to take care of the horses,‘ said Alexander, handing me a box.
‘There are buckets of treats in the alley, so you should take some of those. Gahna is crazy about them,’ he continued.
While I was getting the treats out of the bucket, Georg Peter explained what he should do. As I entered my box, the stable door opened and it got noisy. The whole bunch now entered the stable and looked for their horses.
I devoted myself to Gahna and did what Alexander had told me. Gahna had quickly realised that I had something in my pocket, because she kept sniffing my trousers. So I gave her a treat, which she chewed with relish.
After the first rush was over and everyone had found their horse, I heard Alexander, Georg and his mother explaining what the others had to do. I could see Benjamin in the box two boxes away from me.
The horse looked quite small next to him, and I couldn't help grinning. I looked around some more and finally found Tim. He was standing next to a dark brown horse in its stall and looked rather unhappy.
Gahna nudged me with her head. It seemed as if I should carry on, or give her another treat. So I continued grooming her fur.
Peter
Everyone was talking excitedly as we were on our way to breakfast. No one complained about getting up early anymore. And Tobi and I were right in the middle of it. Everyone raved about their horse.
When we entered the house, I couldn't see my brother anywhere.
‘Have you seen Tim?’ I asked Benjamin.
‘No, I thought he had already gone ahead.’
I shrugged and entered the breakfast room with Benjamin. There was plenty of everything, so I tumbled hungrily over the breakfast table.
‘Rascal is a bit of an understatement,‘ said Tobi as he sat down next to me.
‘Why?’ I asked.
‘Jacco is teasing me all the time. He's pushing me or grabbing at me.’
‘You have to show him who's the boss!‘ I said, grinning.
‘Haha...’
I bit into my bun.
‘Where's your brother?’ Tobi suddenly asked me.
‘I don't know, I've been looking for him too,’ I replied.
‘That's strange... He was with us a moment ago.’
‘I don't know either. He's been acting weird all morning.’
‘Why?’
‘Since he...’ I looked around the table and whispered, ’since he saw us together in bed.’
‘You mean...’
‘I don't mean anything at all. I just can't figure out my brother.’
Tobi looked at me helplessly. When we had finished breakfast, we dutifully took our things to the return desk. In the hallway, we met Georg, who had just come out of the kitchen.
‘Have you seen my brother?‘ I asked.
‘Tim?’
‘Yes!’
‘He was in the stable with Alexander when I left. Wasn't he at breakfast?’
‘No.’
Georg went to the door and stepped outside without saying a word. Tobi and I followed him. Alexander was standing in the yard with his brow furrowed.
‘Have you seen Peter's twin brother?’ Georg called.
‘Yes, he's still in the stables, why?’
‘Because he wasn't at breakfast.’
‘If I were him, I wouldn't have left either.’
‘Why not?’
‘He's crying...’
Please – my brother is crying? Stunned, I looked at Tobi, who just shrugged his shoulders.
*-* End of part 1 *-*