07-11-2025, 04:27 PM
I was still gently slumbering when the phone rang. I woke up with a start and looked tired and annoyed at the ringing nerve box.
Actually, I didn't want to answer the phone, but somehow it didn't stop and I finally answered with a short “Hello”.
It was my boyfriend calling from his skiing holiday with his three friends. He didn't want to take me with him.
I replied, aghast: “It's 8 o'clock in the morning! It's Sunday! What does that tell you???
What are you so irritable about? We just came from the party and I thought of you and wanted to hear your voice.?
And you remembered that at 8 o'clock in the morning? You haven't gotten in touch with me for three days and this morning you had to call?
Well, maybe I'm still a little tipsy.
He laughed.
Yes, but that's not my problem. I had a hard week at school. And on Friday I messed up with the grades again!
You're so sweet, my little one!
I knew he wasn't interested. He never listened to me. I was glad when he finally hung up and I could go back to sleep.
Hello? Why aren't you answering? I'd like you with me right now!
Tell me, do you actually care how I am? I've messed up again and you don't care at all?
I was really annoyed now. And no longer tired of sheer anger: “Why did you call?”
“I love you!”
“Bad conscience, huh?”
I knew he was cheating on me. I just sense these things.
No, really, you're so sweet!
You're repeating yourself.
In the background, at the other end of the line, I suddenly realized something that amazed me.
“Say, aren't you alone?”
“Yes, why do you ask?”
“You can't be kidding me, I can hear a voice in the background and you're a little out of breath, too.”
I realized that I wasn't getting more angry, but rather calmer, and that amazed me.
“Timo came up to the room for a moment and we wanted to have a quick nightcap, and I just ran up the stairs because I wanted to hear your voice.”
Maybe my voice and my pulse slowed down because maybe I was finally getting out of the relationship. I just wanted a reason. Maybe that was the reason. The end. I just didn't dare to complain.
Actually, he could do whatever he wanted. I felt like I was in a “fake open relationship”.
“Nice ass,” said a strange voice.
I swallowed briefly and asked, ”What? Who was that?”
It went quiet on the other end of the line and I only heard Kevin, my friend, say quietly, “Shh, not so loud!”
“What shouldn't be said so loudly?” I asked in a very calm voice. I realized that I had really closed myself off from Kevin. I didn't want any more and was determined to end it now.
“Kevin, what's wrong?” I asked.
I felt so strong. It was weird. Did I really wait a whole year just to end this relationship for a reason? I must be crazy. Anyway.
Kevin: ”He's drunk. He's groping all over the place. The old pig. Now he's quiet!?
“Why just now??
He's got something to do now!?
I could imagine what kind of employment it was and I heard how Kevin's voice became more and more agitated. Smugly, I just asked: “Oh? What kind of employment is that?”
Kevin didn't react immediately and I could tell that he was preoccupied.
“Hmm, it tastes so good.”
Now I was shocked again. My suspicion was apparently true. I couldn't believe it, even though I was prepared for it. Is my boyfriend cheating on me while he's on the phone with me?
That would be the crowning glory of his insolence, which he had already displayed on many occasions.
“You see, he's busy!”
How, though? I replied.
How?
What has he got in his mouth that tastes so good?
My friend was quiet for a moment, then answered with a question: How, in his mouth?
What does he like the taste of? I repeated slowly, so that any idiot would understand.
He drinks schnapps! You remember? Nightcap? I gave it to him.
I rolled my eyes.
He could lie so beautifully without blushing. That was my biggest mistake. I could never stay mad at him for very long. At the latest, when he stood in front of me with his dachshund eyes, I was usually done for.
Was that why I was hell-bent on breaking up with him by phone now? Since he couldn't look at me with his eyes? After all, he was still skiing until Thursday.
Yes, yes, whoever believes it will be blessed. Kevin, I know that you are very good at lying.
I was curious about his reaction.
I'm not lying. Why do you always have to be so suspicious? You know I love you. Do you still hold it against me that I didn't take you with me? There was a reason for that!?
Yes, I know the reason. It's called cheating, I said bitterly.
Now stop it and shut up. I'm sick of listening to this crap! I can't take it anymore. I was really looking forward to Thursday. But slowly I'm starting to doubt you. I don't have the strength.
You don't have the strength? What don't you have the strength for? I almost screamed hysterically into the phone.
You've already cheated on me here and there you were on vacation with your friends just right. That you're cheating is bad enough, but that you call me on it, too, is the last straw.
I wanted to end the conversation, but something inside me wouldn't let me press the button that would have released me. Did I really want to deal with everything on the phone RIGHT NOW?
“But you're forgetting one thing!”
“Oh yeah? What?”
“None of my friends here, neither Timo, nor Frank, nor Ludger are gay!”
“Bi!”
? H?r times they are scared to lie next to me. They panic I sink my morning latte accidentally in them! And you're jealous of them??
And please WHY didn't you want to take me with you?
Schatzi, I know what you think of straights and their drinking bouts. I wanted to spare you that. I'm just the type who can join in and even have fun with it. But not you. You know that. Smile, little one. Besides, I have a surprise for you!
I realized that I was getting soft again, even though I didn't want to.
“A surprise? What kind of surprise?”
I couldn't answer him, I was way too excited about the surprise he had announced. What could it be? Was it something positive? Or did he just want to tell me that it's over between us?
Actually, I hate it when you're so jealous and bitchy for no reason. I'm running out of ways to show you how much I love you. I feel like you're just waiting for a day to get rid of me. So I'll try my last surprise: I won't be coming on Thursday. I'll be staying until Sunday!?
?What? That's your surprise???
Yes!
How?
Schatzi, you took Thursday and Friday off because I was coming back, right?
Yes! So?
I hired Sandra to bring you here to me in the snow.
I was totally flabbergasted and didn't know what to say. I just stammered,
“Me?..to you?..in the snow?..on Thursday?..with Sandra?”
Yes, my darling, now you are perplexed. I miss you so much and I'm looking forward to spending a nice long weekend with you. Timo is asleep now. I love you, my darling. Try to get some sleep now and sorry for the early disturbance.
I was still speechless.
“Darling?” Kevin asked.
I stuttered.
“Yes, yes, yes, yes, yes!
Are you coming?
“Yes, of course I'll be there on Thursday,” I called enthusiastically.
“I LOVE you!”
Either he was a great liar or he was the best friend anyone could wish for. I said goodbye to him, in love, and hung up the phone. Until my next little attack of jealousy.
Love? That's how it is!
Actually, I didn't want to answer the phone, but somehow it didn't stop and I finally answered with a short “Hello”.
It was my boyfriend calling from his skiing holiday with his three friends. He didn't want to take me with him.
I replied, aghast: “It's 8 o'clock in the morning! It's Sunday! What does that tell you???
What are you so irritable about? We just came from the party and I thought of you and wanted to hear your voice.?
And you remembered that at 8 o'clock in the morning? You haven't gotten in touch with me for three days and this morning you had to call?
Well, maybe I'm still a little tipsy.
He laughed.
Yes, but that's not my problem. I had a hard week at school. And on Friday I messed up with the grades again!
You're so sweet, my little one!
I knew he wasn't interested. He never listened to me. I was glad when he finally hung up and I could go back to sleep.
Hello? Why aren't you answering? I'd like you with me right now!
Tell me, do you actually care how I am? I've messed up again and you don't care at all?
I was really annoyed now. And no longer tired of sheer anger: “Why did you call?”
“I love you!”
“Bad conscience, huh?”
I knew he was cheating on me. I just sense these things.
No, really, you're so sweet!
You're repeating yourself.
In the background, at the other end of the line, I suddenly realized something that amazed me.
“Say, aren't you alone?”
“Yes, why do you ask?”
“You can't be kidding me, I can hear a voice in the background and you're a little out of breath, too.”
I realized that I wasn't getting more angry, but rather calmer, and that amazed me.
“Timo came up to the room for a moment and we wanted to have a quick nightcap, and I just ran up the stairs because I wanted to hear your voice.”
Maybe my voice and my pulse slowed down because maybe I was finally getting out of the relationship. I just wanted a reason. Maybe that was the reason. The end. I just didn't dare to complain.
Actually, he could do whatever he wanted. I felt like I was in a “fake open relationship”.
“Nice ass,” said a strange voice.
I swallowed briefly and asked, ”What? Who was that?”
It went quiet on the other end of the line and I only heard Kevin, my friend, say quietly, “Shh, not so loud!”
“What shouldn't be said so loudly?” I asked in a very calm voice. I realized that I had really closed myself off from Kevin. I didn't want any more and was determined to end it now.
“Kevin, what's wrong?” I asked.
I felt so strong. It was weird. Did I really wait a whole year just to end this relationship for a reason? I must be crazy. Anyway.
Kevin: ”He's drunk. He's groping all over the place. The old pig. Now he's quiet!?
“Why just now??
He's got something to do now!?
I could imagine what kind of employment it was and I heard how Kevin's voice became more and more agitated. Smugly, I just asked: “Oh? What kind of employment is that?”
Kevin didn't react immediately and I could tell that he was preoccupied.
“Hmm, it tastes so good.”
Now I was shocked again. My suspicion was apparently true. I couldn't believe it, even though I was prepared for it. Is my boyfriend cheating on me while he's on the phone with me?
That would be the crowning glory of his insolence, which he had already displayed on many occasions.
“You see, he's busy!”
How, though? I replied.
How?
What has he got in his mouth that tastes so good?
My friend was quiet for a moment, then answered with a question: How, in his mouth?
What does he like the taste of? I repeated slowly, so that any idiot would understand.
He drinks schnapps! You remember? Nightcap? I gave it to him.
I rolled my eyes.
He could lie so beautifully without blushing. That was my biggest mistake. I could never stay mad at him for very long. At the latest, when he stood in front of me with his dachshund eyes, I was usually done for.
Was that why I was hell-bent on breaking up with him by phone now? Since he couldn't look at me with his eyes? After all, he was still skiing until Thursday.
Yes, yes, whoever believes it will be blessed. Kevin, I know that you are very good at lying.
I was curious about his reaction.
I'm not lying. Why do you always have to be so suspicious? You know I love you. Do you still hold it against me that I didn't take you with me? There was a reason for that!?
Yes, I know the reason. It's called cheating, I said bitterly.
Now stop it and shut up. I'm sick of listening to this crap! I can't take it anymore. I was really looking forward to Thursday. But slowly I'm starting to doubt you. I don't have the strength.
You don't have the strength? What don't you have the strength for? I almost screamed hysterically into the phone.
You've already cheated on me here and there you were on vacation with your friends just right. That you're cheating is bad enough, but that you call me on it, too, is the last straw.
I wanted to end the conversation, but something inside me wouldn't let me press the button that would have released me. Did I really want to deal with everything on the phone RIGHT NOW?
“But you're forgetting one thing!”
“Oh yeah? What?”
“None of my friends here, neither Timo, nor Frank, nor Ludger are gay!”
“Bi!”
? H?r times they are scared to lie next to me. They panic I sink my morning latte accidentally in them! And you're jealous of them??
And please WHY didn't you want to take me with you?
Schatzi, I know what you think of straights and their drinking bouts. I wanted to spare you that. I'm just the type who can join in and even have fun with it. But not you. You know that. Smile, little one. Besides, I have a surprise for you!
I realized that I was getting soft again, even though I didn't want to.
“A surprise? What kind of surprise?”
I couldn't answer him, I was way too excited about the surprise he had announced. What could it be? Was it something positive? Or did he just want to tell me that it's over between us?
Actually, I hate it when you're so jealous and bitchy for no reason. I'm running out of ways to show you how much I love you. I feel like you're just waiting for a day to get rid of me. So I'll try my last surprise: I won't be coming on Thursday. I'll be staying until Sunday!?
?What? That's your surprise???
Yes!
How?
Schatzi, you took Thursday and Friday off because I was coming back, right?
Yes! So?
I hired Sandra to bring you here to me in the snow.
I was totally flabbergasted and didn't know what to say. I just stammered,
“Me?..to you?..in the snow?..on Thursday?..with Sandra?”
Yes, my darling, now you are perplexed. I miss you so much and I'm looking forward to spending a nice long weekend with you. Timo is asleep now. I love you, my darling. Try to get some sleep now and sorry for the early disturbance.
I was still speechless.
“Darling?” Kevin asked.
I stuttered.
“Yes, yes, yes, yes, yes!
Are you coming?
“Yes, of course I'll be there on Thursday,” I called enthusiastically.
“I LOVE you!”
Either he was a great liar or he was the best friend anyone could wish for. I said goodbye to him, in love, and hung up the phone. Until my next little attack of jealousy.
Love? That's how it is!