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"Hello! Meals on Wheels are here!"
Sascha placed the full shopping baskets on the kitchen table.
"There was no cottage cheese left. You have to go into town yourself. I didn't feel like driving into the city for two euros."
"Whatever. It doesn't taste good anyway. You should spread it on your crispbread for breakfast," remarked Lena, who had come into the kitchen to help him unpack.
"Does your Brigitte diet say the thirty-seventh?" teased Sascha, taking off his jacket, which then landed on the sofa.
"Yes, come on, rub salt in the wound! Hit it! Beanstalk! You're eating your way through our supplies without putting on an ounce of fat!" Lena replied, mock-offended.
"I just want to protect you from your cravings! I'm only doing this for you!"
Lena threw a packet of soup at him.
"Here, your change... where's Philip?"
"Haven't seen him today. I assume he's still asleep." Lena packed her groceries into her refrigerator compartment.
"He's totally burying himself... what's wrong with him?"
"I don't know. I rarely see him anymore anyway. I don't know what he does all day. He's probably just sitting in front of his computer the whole time."
"Is there any way to lure him away? Or is he brooding over a hot new program for NASA?"
Lena let out an annoyed sigh. "I have no idea. I've become very suspicious of this guy in the last few months. Ever since that stupid internet incident last summer."
"Because of the IT guy? Really? Do you think he's still tackling this?"
"Well, it really affected him. And he was never the same afterward. Maybe he hasn't processed it yet."
They didn't say anything for a while until they had put away all the shopping.
"Coffee?" asked Sascha. "Sure!"

*****

It was almost two o'clock. The university library was about to close. Philip hated Saturdays. Why couldn't they work on the weekend too? He packed his things—his notebook, notes, and pen—after the unpleasant bell signaled the imminent closing. At least he'd gotten a lot done today. He could actually treat himself to a free weekend now. But what was he supposed to do with it?

Philip left the library. He loved being there on Saturdays, as most students were still recovering from the previous evening's parties and weren't thinking about studying. He usually sat alone in the computer science section, working on his thesis undisturbed.

It was April, the new semester had started the previous week. And spring had arrived. The weather was perfect for sitting on the balcony. But Philip didn't really notice the difference from the gloomy winter weather of the past few weeks. He got into his old VW Golf and drove off.

The streets were busy. Philip cursed a few times at the, in his eyes, hormone-driven convertible drivers who were taking advantage of the opportunity and the excellent weather to drive their summer cars. Finally, he pulled into the driveway of the house where he shared an apartment with Sascha and Lena. Just as he got out and locked the car, another car pulled into the driveway. A convertible.

Philip held his breath for a moment. It was Patrick.

"Hi!" Patrick got out of his Beetle convertible and smiled at him.
»Hi!«
"Well, have you been busy yet?" Patrick pointed to his bag.
"Uh, yeah, I was still in the library, writing something."
"Ah, and what else is on the agenda today? Do you have to keep working?"
"Nope, not today. I don't know yet. Maybe TV or something..."
"Are you crazy? In THIS weather? That would be throwing pearls before swine! What do you think about a little drive somewhere? To Cologne or Frankfurt..."
"What now?"
Patrick shrugged. "Why not?!"
"Hmmm..." Philip thought for a moment.
"Yeah, why not? I'll... bring in my laptop. Are you coming with me?"

They went into the house. The apartment was on the first floor. Philip unlocked the door. Lena was busy putting on her denim jacket in the hallway. A packed duffel bag stood next to her.

"Hi!" She smiled at the unknown visitor.
"Hi. Are you going home?" Philip wanted to know.
"Yes, it's my dad's birthday. But I'll be back on Monday."
"This is my roommate Lena. Lena, this is Patrick."
They shook hands. "Hi, Patrick! Are you studying together?" she asked, tying her hair into a braid.
"No, I'm already done! Luckily!" laughed Patrick.
"Well, Philip's almost done... so, I have to go. My train leaves in a quarter of an hour. Have a nice weekend!"
"You too! See you later!"

Philip put his bag in his room.
“Nice!” Patrick remarked when Lena left the apartment.
"Yes, she is. But sometimes a little curious."
"Aren't we all?" Patrick replied, leaning against the doorframe. He looked around his room.
"Nice room."
"Yes, I feel quite comfortable here too. Nice and bright. And above all, cheap. I pay just under 200 euros, including everything. Would you like a drink?"

Philip walked past him into the kitchen, where he poured himself a glass of Coke.

"Oh yeah, for me too, please!"
"So, what did you do at Easter?"
"Not much. I was home and enjoying myself. My mom got a new dog. He's only a few weeks old. She still needs a little help. But it was nice."
"Really? What kind?" Philip wanted to know.
"A French Shepherd. We already have one. Lili is already eight years old. At first, we thought things would be difficult with the little one. But Lili is really sweet. She takes good care of him."
"So, have you chosen a name yet?"
»House.«
Philip grinned. "Maya... Maaaajaaaaa!" Philip imitated Willi from Maya the Bee. They laughed.
»You can come along...«
"Let's see."

After finishing their drinks, they headed outside. Philip put on a baseball cap as Patrick drove off, top down, of course.
"I'm so glad it finally stopped raining! The car just has to drive WITHOUT the top!" Patrick was euphoric.
"Well, here you have to expect that it's only nice three months a year. I would never buy a convertible!"
Patrick looked at him reproachfully. "Now tell me you don't like it!"
"Nope!" Philip grinned. "It's pretty cool like that!"
Patrick turned on the CD player. Scissor Sisters.

Their journey took them to Cologne, where it was two degrees warmer than at home. They were lucky and quickly found a free parking space at the opera house.
"I haven't been to Cologne in ages!" said Philip as Patrick closed the roof. "To be honest, neither have I. I used to be here regularly two years ago. But then... my ex lives here."
"We could go to the banks of the Rhine. Have ice cream or something..." Philip suggested. Patrick agreed.

*****

Sascha was sitting on the balcony, listening to music and smoking, when Philip returned home late that evening. Philip joined him, holding two bottles of beer from the fridge.

"Hi, did you have a nice evening?" asked Sascha, picking up a bottle. "Thanks!"
"Yeah, it was okay... I was in Cologne."
"In Cologne? Alone?"
"No, Patrick was just standing at the door this afternoon when I came out of the library."
»The IT guy?!«
»Yep.«
"Aha... how come?"
"I was wondering, too. He wanted to go off into the blue with me. It was quite nice."
"Quite nice, aha... and what else?"
"Hmm, I don't know anything else... He just dropped me off here and said we could do it again sometime."
"And do you want that too?"
"If I knew! I mean, it was a great day today..."

They didn't say anything for a while, but drank their cold beer.
"What's been going on with you lately?" asked Sascha. "You're just sitting around in your room..."
"The thesis... well, and otherwise I don't feel like going on the slopes."
"It's not about leaving... Lena and I don't even see you here anymore. We're worried."
Philip snorted.
"I'm just saying... if anything happens, feel free to give us a call."
"I know. I'm trying."
"I beg you. Man, we always had so much fun!"

Philip said nothing, but nibbled on the aluminum label of the beer bottle.
"How are you getting on with your thesis?"
"Hmm, pretty good. I'll probably finish next month. Definitely in time," Philip replied, taking a sip from the bottle.
"How about a job? Have you looked around yet?"
"Yes, I might be able to get a foothold where I did my internship. We'll see. I quite liked it there."
"That was something with CMS, right?!"
Philip nodded. "Yes, funnily enough, that's exactly what Patrick does." He smiled.
"Well... sounds good. But I'd look elsewhere. It can never hurt." Sascha held out the cigarette pack. But Philip declined.
"No, let's not! I quit a week ago. I've held out so far."
Sascha raised his eyebrows in appreciation. "Respect! Then I don't want to seduce you any further."
Having said that, he lit another cigarette.

"So, did you talk to the guy again? About what happened back then..." he wanted to know.
Philip shook his head. "No, I... what else can I say?"
"Hmmm, did you ever really talk about it? It didn't seem that way to me back then."
"Actually, not... he once wrote me an email saying he felt kind of weird about me lying to him. That he wasn't sure and all..."
»And now just come over...«
"Yeah, but... we're still in touch. We call or chat every now and then."
"But you haven't done anything together since then..."
"No... oh, I don't know... I'm pretty out of sorts right now, too. It was a really good day today. We had a good chat. It was totally relaxed. Apart from my nervousness..." Philip sighed.
"So you think there's still a chance that he might want more?" Sascha speculated.
"I really don't know. I don't even know if this was a good time to do something with myself. I mean, college... I don't want to get rejected again. That would set me back."
"Well, it takes two. You could have canceled, after all..."
"Yeah, maaaaann! But it was a nice change. I've been wishing for him to find time for me. Well, when he came today... it was pretty cool."
"Oh, man, Philip! You're making this really complicated!" Sascha summarized.
"Why complicated? What would you do?"
"I don't know. But I don't think I'd really want to live in uncertainty all the time. It would wear me out, really!"
"You think I should turn him on?"
"At least confront him... or turn him on... he MUST respond to one of those!"
"I can't do that..."
"You have to know. But you'll definitely feel better once you've gotten over it. Or are with him... I mean, THAT option is still definitely there, after what you're saying."
Philip looked at his hands.
"I'm going to sleep. Night."
"Night, Philip. And stop sitting in front of the computer so long! It's unhealthy!"

*****

“Hi, are you still awake?”
"hi... yeah... can't sleep"
"Me too. I was hoping to see you here."
"It was nice today"
"I think so too. And a thousand times better than watching TV."
„*g*“
"My neighbor wanted me to have a drink with her, but I fobbed her off."
"I drank another beer with my MB"
"Sascha"
"Exactly"
“You like him, don’t you?”
“Yes, that’s correct”
"Should I be worried?"
"Huh?"
“oh, forget it”
“no, he likes women *fg*”
"cut down"
“What are you listening to right now?”
"Mad world, but original. You?"
„patience“
"You have to burn it for me"
"clear"
„philip?“
„Patrick?“
"I thought a hundred times today whether I should come to you... I was really unsure."
"What, only a hundred times?"
“could have been a hundred and five times”
„?“
“Maybe I should have done it sooner”
„was?“
“visit you, do something with you”
„hmmm“
"oh oh"
„was?“
"Now you're "hmming" again..."
"hmm, yeah, sorry..."
"Do you still want to come over?"
"like right now???!!!"
"and"
"I don't know..."
“Okay, no need... sorry”
"No problem... but I'm really done for today"
"Okay... are you going to bed?"
"I think so... bad?"
“Too bad... but okay”
"good night then"
“Yes, sleep well too, Philip”
"see you then"

*****

Luckily there were gas stations, and thus (relatively) fresh rolls on Sunday.
Philip hadn't slept well, but he'd managed to stay in bed until eleven o'clock. He'd been too sluggish to get up. Now, after a long shower, he felt more rested. He'd walked to the gas station, which was only ten minutes from his apartment. The weather had held up. On the way back, his eyes fell on Patrick's car. It was parked in front of his apartment, which was also only a block away from Philip's. He didn't have a garage and always had to park on the street. Philip's heart beat faster.

He was very smitten.

They had met last summer, online. Philip had been very frustrated at the time because a relationship had ended, and it had been very unpleasant. Since he had developed a strong hatred of men at the time, he had unloaded it on the first person who had messaged him online in a chat. That was Patrick. Philip had fed him a ridiculous story about himself. The whole thing went on for several weeks and culminated in Philip sending him an email with his real CV. By that point, he had already been head over heels in love with him. They had chatted for hours and eventually even spoken on the phone. Before the whole thing finally got completely out of hand, he had decided to tell the truth after intensive consultation with Sascha, his best friend.
Philip had expected a lot: insults, a break in contact,... but not that he would be standing at his door ten minutes later. Which was what happened. Then they saw each other for the first time. It was very strange. They never exchanged pictures. Philip had fallen in love with him instantly. What followed was a night of wild kissing, followed by a lull. Patrick had calmed down and hadn't wanted to intensify their contact any further. This plunged Philip into a deep crisis for the rest of the year.

Philip had made coffee and made himself comfortable on the balcony. But he couldn't concentrate on the Sunday newspaper. Since yesterday, his thoughts had been constantly circling around Patrick. It was like nine months ago. He knew what that meant. It was pointless; he had to surrender to his thoughts. While the coffee brewed, his gaze wandered across the street. Maybe he should call him and ask if he'd like breakfast...

The doorbell rang. Once, twice,...
"Hello?"
»Hi, Philip here!«
»Oh, hi!«
"Um... breakfast at my place?"
"Yes... hmm... okay... I'll be right there!"
"Great! See you soon!"

What had he done?! He'd be standing at the door any minute! What did he even look like? Philip rushed into the bathroom to check his style. Okay, dark circles under his eyes. Well, the night had been short. A little gel in his hair. That would have to do. He waited for him in the bathroom. He looked at himself in the mirror the whole time. Brown hair, dark eyes... Patrick liked that, he knew it.

The doorbell rang. Philip jumped. He rushed into the hallway, pressed the buzzer, and opened the apartment door. Patrick.

“Hi!” Patrick greeted him, beaming.
"Good morning, or... it's already past twelve... come in!"
"I'm glad you called me."
Philip smiled. "It's great that you came!"

He led him to the balcony. "Coffee or tea? Oh, no, you prefer cocoa!"
"If you don't mind...?" Philip laughed. "Coming right away!"

He warmed a cup of milk in the microwave and added four spoonfuls of cocoa powder. Philip knew Patrick liked it very sweet.

*****

"Hello, Philip"
„Patrick!“
"How's it going?"
„gut“
"and?"
"and"
„hm“
"why, hmm?"
“Why are we chatting again?”
“because we are online”
"apparently"
"What do you mean, Patrick?"
"I feel like we've been talking like this for too long..."
“over the net?”
“Yes... we've gotten too used to it... that's why we can't even talk normally.”
"Do you think?"
"Yes, when we are together, we don't talk about such things"
"what things?"
"about, for example, that you don't feel well either..."
„hm“
„ring...“

The phone rang.
»And?«
"That's better, isn't it?" Patrick.
Philip leaned back in his chair. "Yes." He took a sip of water from the glass next to the computer keyboard.
“So, what do you think?” Patrick wanted to know.
"I don't really know... I thought today was a nice day..." Philip turned off his PC.
"I somehow find every day with you beautiful." Did he really say that?
"The way you say it..."
"What's wrong with that?"
"No."
"Okay... um, to be honest..."
»And?«
"I don't know what you're trying to achieve. I mean, you suddenly show up at my door, we spend time together... I don't really understand what's going on. You've been avoiding coffee with me for months. I kind of gave up on it because I thought you were going to get rid of me... in installments."
"Yeah, I know. I... I'm sorry. I've been very... confused these last few months, I don't know. And Saturday... I was planning this, to be honest. I was totally out of it all morning. I was staring out the window the whole time, trying to see when you'd get home."
"Really? Why?"
"I... I wanted to see you because... I miss our conversations and... it's nice when you're here."
"Wow, this is... real?"
Patrick laughed. "Yeah, man! Sorry, I don't find it easy to talk about things like that."
"But why? We've been talking about 'things like that' the whole time?"
"Yes, but... I don't know why that is..."
"Hmm, and now?"
"Do you have any plans for tomorrow evening?" Patrick asked quietly.
"No, I'm just at university all day, I guess."
"Can we see each other?"
"Sure! Maybe we can have a barbecue or something. If the weather holds..."
"Yeah, that would be an idea... we can call again tomorrow."
"Okay... then... good night, Patrick."
"Sleep well, Philip!"

*****

The weather held up.

When Philip came home that evening, Lena was already in the kitchen, preparing a salad. Philip had met her in the cafeteria that afternoon and told her about the plans to kick off the barbecue season. Naturally, she was immediately enthusiastic and agreed to contribute. Philip had taken care of the barbecue meat, which he put away in the fridge.

"So, when is Patrick coming?" she wanted to know as she took care of the dressing.
"He wanted to come by at seven." Philip poured himself a glass of milk.
"So, are you excited yet?" Lena grinned. Philip rolled his eyes.
"I don't know what that means. I don't want him to fly again. That was really too much."
"I can understand that. But if he's putting in so much effort... maybe he's really thought it through!"
"Well, we'll see. I'm going to take a shower."

It was just after seven o'clock when the doorbell rang. Philip had already fired up the grill. He was a real fire freak and loved throwing all sorts of things into the fire. But he held back because he knew Lena didn't like that at all.

"Hi!" Patrick stood in the balcony door. He was beaming. Philip smiled.
"Hello!" Philip poked at the coal. "Want a beer?"
"Gladly!"
Philip walked past him into the kitchen and took two bottles of beer from the fridge. He opened them with a lighter lying on the cupboard. He gave one to Patrick.
"Cheers!" said Philip, holding out the bottle for a toast. "Cheers!"
Then Lena and Sascha came onto the balcony.
"Hi, everyone! Have you put anything on the grill yet?" asked Sascha, placing plates on the wooden table on the balcony.
"No, I was just there."

It was a nice evening. Sascha's girlfriend joined us later.
It was around 11:30 when only Philip and Patrick were still sitting on the balcony. They had put the grill aside and filled the firebox with wood, so that a small fire was burning. They looked at each other. Patrick cleared his throat, an indication that he was nervous.

"It's getting a bit chilly here..." said Patrick.
"Yes, you're right. Let's go inside..." Philip stood up. "The fire will go out on its own. Nothing else can burn in here."

They went into Philip's room.
"Have a seat! Want another drink?"
Patrick shook his head and sat down on the sofa. Philip sat next to him.
"And that's where you always sit when we chat, huh?!" Patrick remarked.
"Yes... and now I'm sitting here... with you..." The alcohol had definitely made him more relaxed, even though he hadn't drunk much.
"I'm glad you're here."
Patrick smiled. "Yes, I'm glad I'm here too... with you..."
It was Patrick who stroked Philip's cheek with one hand. Philip placed his hand on his.
"My doctorate in biology!" whispered Patrick, leaning toward him. Philip laughed.
"Oh, man, I'll never get rid of this!"
"It's your own fault!"
They kissed.
"Was that so hard?" Philip asked, stroking his neck. Patrick smiled.

*****

Done. Philip plopped down on a chair in the kitchen. Lena was there too.
"I did it!" he said.
»Your thesis?«
»Yep!«
"Wow! Congratulations! Just handed it in?" Lena handed him a cup of coffee. Philip nodded.
"Yes, I got the okay from my editor yesterday. Then I printed the final version and had it bound today."
Philip took a folder out of his pocket and placed it on the table.
"Wow, classy! When will you get the results?" Lena wanted to know.
"Four to six weeks. Oh, I'm so glad this is over!" Philip leaned back. "I believe you! And what do you do now? Have you secured the job?"
"Yes, I start next month. So I still have four weeks of vacation left!"
"Envy! Are you leaving?"
Philip grinned. "I don't know... Patrick has no idea I'm finished with the work yet. He thinks I need another month. I'll surprise him at the office..."
"That's sweet!" Lena took a sip of coffee. "You guys are a really good match, you know that? I really think Patrick is very nice."
"He loves you too, by the way."
"Hmm, thanks... what are his people like? Have you met any of them yet?"
"Yes, his neighbors, well, the other residents. They're a clique. Yes, they're actually pretty okay. But it's always weird when you come into a community like that. You feel pretty stupid at first. You know..."
"Yeah, but the more we do things together... I get along really well with Daniel's people. But it took me a while."
"He always wants to take me to his mother's... he goes there often on weekends... but somehow I always talked myself out of it... I don't know if I'm ready yet... family stuff... I'm not really into that."
"Hmm, sure, that's still different. But if she's okay..."
"Yeah, she seems pretty casual. But still... it's official!"
"What's wrong with that?"
Philip hesitated for a moment. "Not really. It's a sign he's serious."
"Well, you see! Well, I'd go along... just out of curiosity!"
"I knew you'd do this for such ignoble reasons!"
Lena stuck her tongue out at him.
"How are your studies going?" he changed the subject.
"Good. I have two more exams, then I'll start my traineeship after the summer break. At the Karenngelisches Gymnasium."
"Cool... then you can annoy the kids!"
"I guess they'll annoy me more!"
"No, you'll get your way!"

In the early afternoon, Philip hopped on his bike and set off for the company where Patrick worked. It was just a few hundred meters from his apartment. Philip had never been there before, but Patrick had given him the green light to pay him a visit.
After locking his bike, he looked for the somewhat hidden entrance. It was a small, well-organized CMS agency that had already achieved considerable success and made a name for itself.

"Hi, um, I'm looking for Patrick Müller's office!"
Philip had stopped the first employee he came across.
"Second door on the right."
"Thanks!"

Philip walked down the hall. All the doors were open. He knew the atmosphere here was very good. Second door on the right. There he was, sitting at his desk, typing on his computer. Philip knocked on the doorframe. Patrick looked up. He immediately beamed from ear to ear.

“Hi!” Philip greeted his friend.
»Hey, hi!«
Patrick had stood up and walked around the desk to him.
"What are you doing here?"
He gave him a kiss on the mouth.
"Surprise you and keep you from work a bit..."

Someone else came into the office. It must have been Patrick's boss, because he himself was the company's "vice" boss, so to speak, and shared the office with him.

"Who wants to stop you from working?" he asked with a grin.
"Ah, this is Philip Kamp..."
"Oh, that's you! I've heard a lot about you! I know you inside and out! André Lenkeit." They shook hands.
"He's exaggerating, of course!" Patrick smiled embarrassedly.
“I should hope so!” replied Philip.
"Yeah, well... I just wanted to tell you that I just submitted my thesis!" he announced proudly.
"What??! I thought you needed another four weeks!" Patrick was genuinely surprised.
"Well, I've been fooled! Again!" grinned Philip.
"Yeah, and now? Vacation or what? Or are you already working?"
"No, I start next month. One more month of vacation."
Patrick rolled his eyes.
"Four weeks! Wow!"

"Why don't you take some vacation? You've got enough overtime," André chimed in. He had meanwhile sat down at his desk.
"Well, you know what it looks like here at the moment..." said Patrick.
"Oh, we'll manage. Why don't you take the next week off? Then you can finish the client for this week, and that'll be it for now. I don't have vacation until next month."
"Hmm..." You could really see Patrick's brain working at full speed.
"Patrick! Don't make yourself more indispensable than you are! If you think about it any longer, I'll change my mind!"
"Yeah, okay, boss! Then I'll just take a vacation! Before I get beaten!"
Philip smiled. "Yeah, great! Then I won't keep you any longer! You finish your business. I have some other things to do." Philip gave him a light punch on the upper arm.
"Do you want to leave already?" Patrick was disappointed.
"Yeah, I just wanted to tell you. I was on my way to the hairdresser... we can do something later..."
"Okay... I'll let you know when I'm done, okay?"
"Okay, take care, you!"
"You too..." A kiss. "Mr. Lenkeit, good business!"
"Yes, and celebrate hard! Bye!"

Patrick sat back down at his table.
"Great love, huh?!"
"Hmm, yes, you could say that... He's great..." Patrick enthused dreamily.
“Why don’t you bring him with you when we go out to eat soon?” suggested André.
"Hmm, yeah, I could actually do that... I'll ask him."

"Was that your friend?" It was his colleague who had poked her head into the office.
"Yes, Lotte. Of course you noticed!" laughed Patrick.
"He looks great! Congratulations!" And she was gone again.

*****

Philip dozed on the balcony in the early evening sun. He'd done nothing but treat himself all day. First, his hair appointment, then a little stroll through town with Lena. And now he was relaxing. He'd been concentrating on his thesis for the past few weeks. Now he was enjoying his free time.

"Honey..." It was Patrick whispering in his ear.
Philip turned around and looked at him tiredly.
"So tired of doing nothing?" Patrick stroked his face.
"Hey, time to call it a day?" Philip sat up.
"Yes, I haven't been home yet..." Patrick smiled.
"Oh, man... I kind of fell asleep!" Philip stretched extensively.

"How was work? Any more stress?" he wanted to know, taking a sip from the water bottle that was on the table next to him.
"No, it wasn't that stressful today. Thanks for helping me get three weeks off!"
"You're welcome!"
Philip leaned forward. They kissed.
"Shall we get something to eat? I'm hungry!" Patrick remarked afterward.
"Yes, of course! But I don't have anything in the fridge. I was too lazy to go shopping."
"My mom called today and asked if we wanted to come over for a barbecue..."
"Ah, so your mother..." Philip grinned.
"I swear, I had nothing to do with this! She called this afternoon!"
"Yeah, okay! Don't panic! Yes, it's a good idea." Philip stood up.
"But I really need to take a shower. I feel disgusting!"
"Yeah, okay, I need to freshen up too. Say, in an hour? I'll pick you up."
"Good... I'm happy!"

At exactly seven o'clock, the horn honked outside Philip's apartment. Freshly showered and dressed casually in beige chinos, a light blue polo shirt, and leather flip-flops, Philip disappeared and quickly walked down the stairs. Patrick was waiting in the car. He, too, had changed and was now wearing cargo pants and a funny T-shirt. A red baseball cap was on his head.

"Hi!" Philip got in and kissed him on the mouth.
"Hmm, you smell good!" Patrick stroked his neck.
"Okay, hmmm, then let's get started!" Philip was visibly tense.
"Hey, calm down! It's no big deal. She'll like you... and you'll like her. Christian and his girlfriend are here too."
»What.«
"It'll be fine... I'm still here!"

They drove off.
They didn't talk much during the drive. Philip was too excited, and Patrick left him alone. It only took half an hour until they reached the place where Patrick grew up. It was more of a large village than a town. Patrick drove the car into a residential area. Finally, he pulled into a driveway that led to a large single-family home.

"So, here we are. Ready?"
Philip just nodded. They got out and walked through a wooden gate into the garden. It already smelled of charcoal. Patrick took his hand as they rounded the corner and landed on the terrace, where they could hear chatter.

His family. Philip's heart was pounding in his throat. He hated situations like this. People were eyeing him curiously, and everyone was waiting anxiously for the first sentence he would say.

"Hello, you two!"
A woman in her fifties approached them. She was good-looking. She had a friendly smile. There was no denying a certain resemblance between her and Patrick. The area around her eyes was unmistakable.

"Hi, Karen!" Patrick gave her a quick hug.
"This is Philip."
“Hello, Mrs. Müller!” They shook hands.
"I'm Karen! Glad you could make it!"

A knee-high ball was already scurrying around her legs.
"Oh, Maja! Well, you sweetie! She's grown again!"
Patrick crouched down to pet the young shepherd dog.

"Yes, this is our youngest family member. She's four months old now."
"It must be very tiring... he's practically a toddler!" Philip remarked.
"You could say that! But that's what I wanted. Our Lili is already very old. She hardly goes outside anymore. And I wanted a dog for walking again. It's working quite well with the little one."
"We always had dogs at home. There were three in total. Well, they were like my babysitters when I was a little older." Philip chuckled. "But they were always some kind of mongrel."

Then someone else joined them. It appeared to be Patrick's brother Christian.
»Hi, I'm Chris!«
"Philip!" Handshakes.
"And how's your thesis coming along? Patrick's already snitched, of course!" grinned Christian, who looked nothing like his brother. Christian was tall, lean, with blond hair and deep blue eyes.
"Oh, I dropped it off this morning! I'm really glad to be rid of that thing. Now I'm on vacation. It's about time," Philip explained.
"Wow, congratulations! And you already have a job lined up?" Christian wanted to know.
"Yes, I'm starting in Bonn. It's a CMS agency, basically the competition!" Philip grinned in Patrick's direction.
"I did an internship there last year. Well, I felt very comfortable there and just asked around. I was lucky; they had openings and were apparently impressed with my work."
"Well, that sounds good. Are you staying in Siegen or moving?"
"Oh, I'll stay at home for now. Who knows how it will turn out. There's still the probationary period. And Bonn isn't far away."
"That's right. I drive to Frankfurt every morning, too. I don't find the commute so bad. I can always relax quite well in the car."
"You just don't want to move out!" Patrick chimed in, referring to the fact that his brother still lived at home with his mother, although he lived in the granny flat with its own entrance.
"Yeah, yeah, the same old story!"

"Come on, guys, go check the grill!" said Karen, heading toward the patio door.
"What would you like to drink, Philip?" she asked.
"Oh, um, I wouldn't say no to a beer either!" Philip replied.

“Hi, Sabine!” Patrick greeted the young woman who had just come out of the house.
"Patrick! How are you? How's work coming along?" she asked, giving him a quick hug.
"Good, good, good! Nice to see you! And did my brother finally propose?"
"Oh, God! What do you dream about at night? He's bristling!" Sabine laughed and went to her friend.
"Just be quiet over there!" Christian shouted in Patrick's direction, who was busy at the grill.
"By the way, that's Patrick's friend, Philip!"
"Hello, I'm Sabine! Nice to see you!"
She was very nice. Very open and friendly.
"Now you've met the whole Müller clan, huh?! They're always awkward situations. But they're all quite friendly."
Philip smiled.
"Yeah, they don't seem like mass murderers... or anything like that!" he laughed.
"You have to congratulate him, he submitted his thesis today!" Christian interjected.
"Hey, congratulations! What subject?"
»Business Informatics.«
"Ah, exciting. I'm currently writing my business administration thesis. But I only started last week. I'm so glad I'm so far through with the exams. This was really getting on my nerves!"
"Yes, the exams were annoying. I'm also glad I have all that behind me. And I already have a job. Most of my classmates are still looking. Well, sometimes you have to be lucky."
"Yes, I'm also curious to see where I end up. But first, let's get to writing, and then we'll see. I'm actually feeling pretty optimistic. Maybe the company I'm writing for will hire me."

The evening was very relaxed. Philip felt very comfortable with the others. He liked Patrick's mother. She behaved completely normally and casually towards him. His own parents hadn't been able to handle his relationships so relaxedly to this day. Although they hadn't broken off contact with Philip, he was happy to communicate with them only by phone.
But Karen was different. She was warm, funny, and interested in what Philip had to say.

As they drove home, it was quite late, Philip was completely silent. But it was different from the nervousness on the drive there.

"It was a nice evening, wasn't it?" Patrick asked during the drive.
"Yes... yes, it was very nice."
"I think Karen likes you."
Philip said nothing.
"Is everything okay?"
Philip nodded.
"You have a very nice family."
"Yeah, well, a little eccentric, but who isn't?!" laughed Patrick.
“Would you like to come with me?” he then asked.
"Oh, no, better not. You have to get up early. And I... I kind of have a headache."
»Oh.«
"I don't know, all the stress that's gone now."
"Okay... do you need any more medication? I have some left."
"No, I still have some pills. Thanks."
They remained silent for the rest of the journey.

"Well, um... sleep well then. And if anything happens, call me, okay?"
They were in front of Philip's apartment.
"Yeah, okay... thanks, it was a lovely evening." A kiss.
"Is everything really okay?"
Philip looked in another direction. He snorted audibly.
"It's just... I felt really good today. I kind of miss that... family life... I don't know what to call it. I don't have that anymore."
Patrick turned off the engine.
"It's not like that at my house... it used to be better, but since I... they can't handle the fact that I'm into men. I mean, they never said it explicitly, but... it was so obvious. No more calls, my mom apparently doesn't have anything to say to me anymore either. And my dad... he always says he doesn't have time. What do I know?"
"I'm sorry for that."
Philip waved his hand. "Oh, it's okay... but when you see that things can be done differently, it always makes me angry. But I can't change it. They are the way they are." He picked at his fingers.
"When was the last time you were home?" asked Patrick.
"For one afternoon on Christmas Day. But I could have saved myself that. I mean, they don't yell or anything. They just treat me like... yeah, like I don't belong. So indifferent."
"I see. But sometimes that's worse than being yelled at, huh?"
Philip nodded.
"And have you ever tried talking to them about it? Maybe if we address it openly...?"
"Forget it! I don't think they're interested. It's been ten years since they found out. If they were interested in any way, they would have spoken to me by now. I'm out of hope. The train has left the station."
"I didn't know you two had such a bad relationship. I'm really sorry about that. But I think my family is also the exception. Well, and I don't have much contact with my father either."
Patrick squeezed his shoulder.
"But knowing my mother, she adopted you long ago."
Philip smiled.
"Thank you, that's kind."
"Do you really want to be alone tonight?" asked Patrick.
"Yes, I... I really have a headache. Thank you. I'll call you tomorrow, okay?"
"I beg you!"
They kissed.
"Sleep well, Philip."
"You too. I love you."

*****

It was Friday afternoon.
Philip sat in the kitchen. He stared at the phone the whole time. Should he call? What would she think? They'd only seen each other once. On the other hand... they obviously liked each other. And besides, Karen was a psychologist. He could talk to her. And he had her phone number. Patrick had given it to him once, in case he wanted to reach him when he was at his mother's.

Philip picked up the phone and dialed the number written in his notebook under "Patrick / Home."

»Müller?«
"Hello, um, this is Kamp, Philip Kamp."
"Philip! Hello! What a surprise! What can I do for you?"
"Um, I... don't really know. It was kind of idiotic to call..."
"Well, if you'd tell me what it was about, we can still decide whether it was idiotic."
"Hmm, right. Oh, man! This is really uncomfortable!"
"Oh, take heart! It won't be that bad."
"I... I'd like to talk to someone. I already... Patrick is great, he's so supportive. But there's one thing... I'd like... could we maybe make an appointment? I know it sounds silly..."
"That sounds really stupid... an appointment... just come by! Do you have time?"
"Uh, now?"
"Sure! I just had my last client. I have time. I'd like to come to you, too, but it's a bit inconvenient because of Maja."
"Yeah, sure... hmm, yeah, if that's okay... I could be here right now."
"Okay, see you later then!"
»Yes, see you soon!«

Completely perplexed, Philip stared at the phone.
Now. He should go to her right now! He hadn't expected that.

Excitedly, Philip pressed the stainless steel doorbell. An excited bark was heard. Maja. Philip had to smile. The modern front door opened. Karen. She beamed.

"Hello, nice to see you! Come in! Have you eaten yet? I made a salad. Feel free to join me."
Philip entered.
"Hello! Um, thanks for letting me come. I didn't think..."
"Nonsense! I have time! And you have something on your mind! That's no problem at all!"

They went to the terrace, where Karen had set the table for two. They sat down.
"Water?"
"Yes, please!"
She poured him water from a glass jug. It contained a few lemon slices and ice cubes. Philip took a sip. It was wonderfully refreshing.
"Would you like some too?" She meant the salad.
"Yes, please. It looks delicious." He helped himself to some salad and dressing.
"Oh, I love being out here in the summer! Last year, my whole life took place here in the garden. It was a great summer!" she enthused.
"Yes, that was it! Well, so far it looks pretty nice. It doesn't have to be 35 degrees in the shade, as far as I'm concerned."
"Yes, sometimes it was too much of a good thing."
"Let's see, Patrick and I might want to go away for another two weeks. He's on vacation starting tonight."
"Yeah, great. Where should we go? Any ideas yet?"
"Hmm, we're not quite sure yet. Something last-minute, or we fly to my sister's in California. That's also an option."
"Oh, that sounds good! Where does she live?"
"In Los Angeles. Well, we'll decide this weekend. First, check out the offers online."
"I'm going to Greece with a friend for two weeks next month."
"Greece is great too! I once vacationed on Rhodes. It was two weeks of pure sunshine. And the food is fantastic!"

During dinner they talked about things like vacations, dogs, convertibles...
Only later did Karen cleverly steer the subject back to Philip's real reason for his visit.

"How's Patrick doing? Is he behaving himself?"
Philip smiled.
"Yes, definitely! He's great. Did he ever tell you how we met?"
"Yes, you were the number one topic of conversation last year. And a few weeks ago he came back, and I advised him to do something with you again. Well, you know the rest."
"Yeah... I'm glad he did it. I'd actually moved on from the whole thing. I still had hope, but... I was totally devastated when he showed up at my door."
"Beautiful... I think he loves you very much... he treats you very lovingly."
Philip was embarrassed.
"I love him very much too."
"What's going on, huh?"

Philip swallowed.
"It's very hard for me... to be honest, I haven't told anyone yet..."
Karen said nothing.
"I somehow suspected it, even before I... I had a nasty flu at the beginning of the year, with all the trimmings. It just wouldn't get better. So I went to the doctor. He diagnosed it with influenza. Eventually, I got better. But... during the examination..." Philip interrupted himself. He took a sip of lemon water. His throat was very dry.
"They tested for all sorts of things. I don't know what you can read from a blood sample. In any case, I'm..." Philip's voice wavered. He took a deep breath, and you could hear him trembling.

He felt a hand on his forearm.
"I'm sorry." Karen spoke quietly but firmly.
"I haven't told anyone yet. It was like... I walked out of the doctor's office and in that moment I couldn't bring myself to say it. I don't know why... I just know I have to tell Patrick. I have no choice."
Philip had stood up and was now standing with his back to Karen.
"I love Patrick. He must know."
"He won't drop you," Karen said.
"We haven't had sex yet. Everything's been perfectly safe. But... I want to too, and he... I don't even know what excuses to give him anymore. But it's not about the sex..."
"I know... you want to tell him."
He nodded.
"Okay... I'm sure he's on your side. I've known Patrick my whole life, you know... and I know he loves you."
"I don't know how to tell him."
"It will work."
They said nothing for a long time.

"How are you, Philip? What are you feeling?"
"At first, I thought, 'That's it, I'm going to leave the practice and be dead.' But that wasn't the case. I left the practice and I was alive. But I'm afraid of that."
"Would you like me to call Patrick? Should he come over?"
"I don't know."
"You have to get rid of it. The sooner the better."
"But what... he still has to work!"
"Let that be my concern."
Karen had also stood up.
"Hey, come here!" With these words, she hugged him tightly. Philip returned the hug. He had to swallow hard a few times to keep his composure.

Philip spent the day with Karen. She had called her son and asked him to come as soon as possible. However, he couldn't get free until around four o'clock. Until then, Philip stayed in the house. He sat in the living room, staring into space, and waited. Karen left him alone. She knew he needed the silence. This calm before the onslaught of strong emotions.

It was around 4:30 a.m. when he heard a car pull into the driveway. It had to be him. His heart immediately began to race. A key turned in the front door lock.

"Karen? What's Philip's car doing here?" With these words, Patrick came into the living room.
"Philip? What are you doing here?"
He rushed to him.
"Hey, what's going on? What are you doing here?"
"It's good to have you here!" Philip stood up.
"Honey! What's that face you're making?" They hugged each other.
“Don’t let me go, please!” whispered Philip.
"Yes, I'm holding you, my darling. I won't let you go."
Patrick held him tightly in his arms for a while. He felt Philip's body tremble. He rocked him gently to calm him down, stroking his back.
»Hey, Philip...«
"Patrick..." Philip freed himself from the hug.
»Was?«

"I... I'm HIV positive."

It was outside. A buzzing sound filled Philip's ears. He felt as if he were wrapped in cotton wool. Everything seemed to be happening in fast forward. He looked at Patrick, then past him. He couldn't hold his gaze.

"I wanted to tell you sooner, but... I couldn't. Nobody knows... I went to your mother's because... I felt with her that I could tell her without... I'm sorry, I should have told her sooner..."
"It's okay," Patrick said calmly.
"But you... you're probably upset and angry right now and... I understand if you don't want to see me again... I mean..."
“Idiot!” Patrick interrupted him.
Philip's house.
"Don't talk such nonsense, listen! I don't want to hear it!" Patrick stroked his head, ruffling his hair. Then he hugged him again.
»Mann, Philip!«

They didn't even notice Karen briefly sticking her head through the living room door, but then carefully closing it.

"I love you, Philip."
Patrick took him by the shoulders and held him away so they could look at each other.
"Don't forget, listen! I love you."
Philip couldn't help it. He'd successfully suppressed it all along, but now the feelings were too strong. His face twisted. He couldn't do anything about it. He felt the tears burning in his eyes, pushing to escape. Seconds later, they made their way down Philip's cheeks to his chin. His throat ached. He sobbed. He wriggled out of Patrick's grip, bent forward, and braced himself with his hands on his thighs. He felt like he couldn't breathe.

"Hey... it's okay..." Patrick said, noticing Philip trying to swallow his tears again. He rubbed his back. He also felt his eyes filling. But he knew he had to be a support to Philip now, so he calmed down and suppressed the strong feeling.
Instead, he took him back into his arms...

It was late in the evening when they set off for home, each in his own car. Patrick was glad to have half an hour alone. He needed to think. He needed to organize his thoughts. Now a lot of things made sense. They'd been together for four weeks, but apart from kissing, nothing had happened so far. Not that it had been particularly important to Patrick, but he had found it a little odd how original Philip had always evaded his advances. They had never spent a single night together.

Patrick turned on the CD player. Come what may... It was the soundtrack to his favorite movie, Moulin Rouge. I will love you until my dying day... Patrick cried uncontrollably. He had finally found the love of his life. He was so sure it was Philip. And now this. He felt like he was in a movie. Barely found, already lost. He had trouble seeing the road ahead. I will love you until the end of time...

By the time they got home, Patrick had calmed down, but his red eyes spoke a different language. He couldn't change it. He parked his car behind Philip's and got out.
Without saying a word, Philip took his hand and led him up the stairs to the front door. The apartment was quiet. The others had left.
Philip noticed his tear-stained eyes, but said nothing. Instead, he led him to his own room, where he switched on a soft mood light that bathed the entire room in a dark orange glow.
"Philip..." Patrick pressed himself against him. "Kiss me!" he begged.
They kissed as if there were no other day. Philip finally took off his glasses. They both knew what would happen tonight. It was long overdue.

*****

The sun's rays formed a path through Philip's room, moving ever closer to the bed. They had already reached the edge of the bed and were now warming an arm that extended over the edge. It was Patrick's arm.

He slowly woke up. He blinked. The room was so bright it almost hurt. He rubbed his eyes. His gaze fell next to him. There lay Philip on his stomach, his mouth slightly open, his hair messy and pillow marks on one cheek. The blanket was only halfway over him, so his upper body was exposed.

Patrick turns to him and just looks at him for a while.
Philip's thick brown hair was slightly wavy and a bit longer on top. When he first saw him, he couldn't help thinking of Hugh Grant. He had a certain resemblance to him. Although, of course, Philip looked a thousand times better!
Two days' worth of stubble was visible on his cheeks. Patrick gently stroked it with a finger. It felt rough, yet soft.
Patrick loved his lips. They were full, sensual, and infinitely soft. He could still remember their first kiss very clearly. He hadn't wanted to stop kissing him. He smiled.
There, a scar, at the bottom of his chin. He'd gotten it in elementary school, at a sports festival. He'd fallen on the cinder track. He was skating along the thin white line. He'd certainly been brave and hadn't shed a tear...
There was a tiny mole next to his left eye. He had incredibly long eyelashes. Long, dark eyelashes. When he'd cried yesterday, they'd been completely stuck together, making him look even sadder.

Patrick leaned forward and kissed his lips. Then he closed his eyes and breathed in his scent. He could get drunk on it. He smelled irresistibly of... yes, what exactly? It was a delicate scent, always with a hint of perfume, but only a very slight one. It was a unique smell. In any case, it drove Patrick crazy.

Then Philip moved. He cleared his throat and shifted his position. The sun had now reached the bed. Philip turned onto his back, stretched, and flexed to stretch his tense muscles. He sighed with relief. He turned his head toward Patrick, who had been watching the whole thing intently. He looked at him.
"Morning!" he murmured.
"Good morning!"
Patrick smiled. He would have loved to hold on to this moment. His heart fluttered at the sight of Philip. He had wanted this since the day he saw him, since July 13, 2003. It was a very intimate moment. Watching someone wake up.
"How long have you been looking at me?" Philip asked, rolling toward him.
"For a while."
"So, did you see anything special?"
"Yes..." Patrick kissed him.
"You're breathing very quietly..." Patrick then remarked, stroking his hair.
"And curl up like a baby."
Philip snuggled close to his friend. Their faces were only a few centimeters apart.
"It was beautiful." Philip was referring to last night.
"Yes I love you..."
"I love you..."
Philip touched Patrick's upper arm.
"Do you think we can do it?" he then asked.
"Of course! I'm absolutely sure." A kiss. "Yesterday was a start."
"Can we perhaps continue there?"

Without answering, Patrick leaned over him and began kissing him, all over. Philip closed his eyes and savored it.

*****

They spent Saturday morning in bed. They didn't manage to get up until around 1 p.m. They took another shower together, and they couldn't keep their eyes off each other.

"Oh, man, I really need fresh clothes! I drove straight home from work yesterday afternoon," said Patrick after his shower.
"I can give you some of mine if you like," suggested Philip.
"Okay, then I don't have to go to my place..." A kiss.

After getting dressed, they made themselves comfortable on the balcony with their laptop and coffee.
"Where would you like to go?" Philip asked. They wanted to look online for last-minute vacation deals.
"Somewhere nice and warm."
"Hmm, that really narrows things down. Europe or overseas?"
"I don't know, I haven't really thought about it yet. The vacation came a bit suddenly."
"Well, we could go to my sister's. I've already talked to her. That wouldn't be a problem. She has a big house and has to work anyway. So we'd have some peace and quiet."
"Los Angeles? Hmm, sounds good..."
"She has a great house! You'd love it! Even a pool outside!"
Patrick smiled.
"You're trying to make this sound appealing to me, aren't you?"
"Sure! And besides, I haven't seen my sister in ages. But we can go somewhere else..."
"No, no, that's okay! I haven't been to California yet. It's sure to be beautiful..."
"Really? Do you want to tie this down?" Philip beamed.
"Yes! Let's fly to LA!"
"Great! It's going to be great, I tell you! When do we want to fly? Do you have a valid passport?"
"Yes, I did... as far as I'm concerned, we can leave tomorrow..."
"Great! I'm so happy!"

*****

Less than 24 hours later, they were sitting in Philip's car and on their way to Frankfurt, from where their plane departed for Los Angeles.

Sascha had agreed to drive them both. "When does your flight leave?" Sascha wanted to know from the back seat.
“At one!” Philip replied.
"Oh, then you're at the airport early enough. Do I have to wait the whole time until you take off?"
"No, you can just throw us out at the terminal. The parking fees are extortionate."
"Okay... I have to be back in Siegen by half past one."
"You'll manage... Thanks for driving."
"No problem."
"Does your sister live on the beach?" asked Patrick, unfolding the map of Los Angeles.
"A quarter of an hour by car."
"Ah... shall we borrow one?"
"My sister and her husband have a few cars in the garage. There'll probably be one left for us."
"A couple of cars? Who are they? Jennifer and Jonathan Hart?" came from the back seat.
They laughed.
"Yeah, sure, self-made millionaires! I'm laughing my head off! My sister is a surgeon and Steve's a musician," Philip explained.
"Wow! I didn't know that! Does she look good?"
"She's married, Sascha! No chance!"
"I'm just saying!" Sascha took a sip of water from the Evian bottle he'd brought with him.
"Can I drive your car somewhere this weekend?" he wanted to know.
"Depends on where!"
"Coast?!"
"Yeah, okay, but don't kick it like that. I need a new timing belt."
"Okay... cool, thanks... then I can visit Karl..."
“The one from Bremen?”
"Yeah, haven't seen him in ages. Let's see what he's up to..."
“We’re flying for almost twelve hours!” Patrick had unpacked the ticket.
"Yes, nonstop! It's better than changing trains a thousand times! And besides, we'll arrive in the afternoon, so we can relax and sleep in!"
“You have to leave here, Philip!” Sascha interjected.
"Oh, cool! Here we are!"

They had reached the airport.
"Terminal B... this way!" Philip became very excited. Patrick looked at him sideways. He had to smile.

It took a good quarter of an hour until they reached the terminal and found a parking space in the short-term parking zone.

"Here we are! Everyone out!" Philip unbuckled his seatbelt and got out.
It was pleasantly warm, a plane had just taken off, and the noise was almost deafening. Philip locked the trunk.
"You have no idea how much I envy you!" said Sascha, helping unload the suitcases. "Can you bring me something nice? A coffee mug with the Hollywood sign on it?!"
"It's probably still in there! Here..." Philip handed him the papers and the car key.
"And here are the dates again for when we'll be back. Do me a favor and be on time, okay?!"
"Ready, Boss!"
"I also wrote down my sister's phone number for you in case anything happens."
"Okay, if the apartment burns down, I'll call! Hey, have fun on vacation, Philip!"
Philip smiled.
“Thank you, Sascha!” They hugged each other.
"I hope you have fun too, Patrick!" Sascha shook his hand.
"Thanks!"
"Okay, then... let's go!"
"I hope so! Take care!" Sascha got into the car and waved to the two of them as he pulled out of the parking space.
"Then we can get started!" said Patrick and went to organize a luggage cart.

Patrick stood at the glass front facing the runway, taking pictures of the plane they were about to board with his digital camera. Philip browsed through a travel guide.

Yesterday had been stressful, but it was stress they were happy to take on. Positive stress, so to speak. They had quickly found tickets online. They had even found them at a very reasonable price. Afterwards, he had called his sister out of bed and asked if they could come. Of course, it was no problem. Quite the opposite. She was happy to see her little brother again.

Afterwards, they went on the usual shopping trip to drugstores: shampoo, shower gel, toothpaste, sunscreen... the kind of purchases you enjoy. Patrick had last been on a proper vacation four years ago: two weeks in Ibiza at a friend's house. So it was time to relax again.

Finally, they were allowed to board. They had good seats with plenty of legroom. Philip sat by the window after stowing his hand luggage and placing his MP3 player in the storage compartment. Patrick, meanwhile, had stocked up on daily newspapers, which he put aside for the time being. He leaned over Philip and looked out. The weather was beautiful.
"I'm looking forward to seeing you!" he whispered in his ear.
Philip smiled. He gave him a gentle kiss.
"I'm excited too... it's going to be a great vacation."
They held each other's hands.

It was a smooth flight, no turbulence, and they took off on time. Philip fell asleep during the movie a few hours later. Patrick covered him with the fleece blanket to protect him from the dry, cold air.

He couldn't sleep. His thoughts were everywhere and nowhere. Before leaving this morning, he had spoken to his mother on the phone. She supported him completely, because she also liked Philip very much. She knew it was a difficult situation and that both of them still had many hurdles to overcome. But at the moment, all that mattered was that they were growing even closer, that Philip could be sure that he had found a partner who would stand by him, no matter what.

Last night, which they had spent apart, Patrick had researched the internet. About the current state of medicine regarding AIDS, about therapies, and specialized practices in the area. He knew that information alleviated fear somewhat. He was someone who approached problems rationally. He had spent almost the entire night in front of the screen until his eyes were almost closing. He had also ordered various literature. He wanted to learn as much as possible. He had discovered that research in the USA was much more advanced than in Europe, and that new medications came to market faster. He had decided to get some literature.

"Can I get you anything else? A coffee, tea?" a flight attendant interrupted his thoughts.
"Oh, um, yes, that would be very nice. A tea would be nice, thank you!"
The young woman poured him a cup of tea.
"Here you go!"
"Thank you, very kind!"

His mother had offered to involve some of his colleagues. She had many contacts in the medical field. Patrick was very grateful, but he still had to find out to what extent Philip had already received treatment. But he knew he had to proceed cautiously. He didn't want to overwhelm Philip.

A few hours later. Philip had woken up. Patrick had also managed to doze for a short while. But the general commotion in the cabin indicated that the destination was near. The screen showed that the approach had begun and they only had half an hour to wait.

"Well, you sleepyhead!"
"Oh man, I was snoring the whole time?"
"You could say so! Look, we're about to land!" They looked outside.
California was cloudless. The pilot had reported 35° Celsius. The forecast for the next few days was also excellent.

*****

Patrick pushed the luggage cart toward the baggage claim exit. Philip looked around searchingly. His sister Merle wanted to pick them up. She had the week off and was looking forward to a visit. Her husband, Steve, was often away as a musician, and he was in England for the next two weeks to record.

"There she is!" Philip cried. He had spotted her.
»Merle!«
Then she noticed her brother. She waved and ran toward him.
"Philip! Hello!" They hugged each other.

Merle was pretty. She had short dark blonde curls with lighter highlights and a radiant smile. Her whole face was smiling. She was a head shorter than her brother and very petite. Patrick didn't know much about his family, only that Philip was very fond of his sister.

"I can't believe it! You look great!" Merle was thrilled.
"How was the flight? Did you make a layover? Is this Patrick?" So many questions at once. Philip hugged her tightly.
"Oh, Merle, I missed you so much!" he whispered.
"And I'm looking at you! Look!" She pushed herself away from him and pushed up her T-shirt. A round little belly was visible. Absolutely obvious.
"Oh, my God! Merle!!!" Philip placed a hand on her stomach.
"When?!" He was stunned.
"I'm five months pregnant... awesome, right?!"
"That's great! I'm happy for you!" He kissed her forehead.
"My big sister is going to be a mom!"
Meanwhile, Patrick had maneuvered the luggage cart toward them...